58 replies to this topic

[japjeev singh]

So i am Sikh and 14 well i have a turban i wear. and i have Mustache Which i secretly shave without my parents finding out.I am starting to have a beard and i dont want to have it. while my parents are religious there amrit shaika. I want to cut my hair and shave. I want to shave now i am scared to tell this to my parents. I really want to shave its not that i dont believe in the religion. I have a lot of trust in this religion i have soul for it,i am a vegeterian even i dont mind that i do path everything. But Having hair is just a real pain. Its really unconformable,girls dont find it attractive at all, You spend so much time doing it and stuff, People find it weird and make fun of you and there are more i dont feel like listing. but you got the point. I mean how can i convince to cut my hair. please be nice and have a good reply

[Wales85]

Hey Buddy,
First of all I think its awesome that you haven't cut your hair yet. I am a white dude, and I can promise you that lots of those white dudes who may make fun of you are really just insecure about themselves. Why else would they mess with you?
Your 14, its perfectly normal to feel awkward about yourself and want to change yourself. All the other kids in the class feel the same way, but just about different aspects of themselves. Cutting your hair would not make this go away... you would still need the latest clothes/the right little "click" of friends/etc.
Also, you think shaving every day isn't a pain? Its a huge pain!
If girls don't like your hair you should consider that a blessing. At your age you should focus only on school and success. Nothing else matters. Did you hear about that gursikh doctor who cant get a wife? Oh yea... he doesn't exist. I know its hard, but girls are a distraction right now... anything that keeps them away is a blessing. Also, any girl that would date while in high school is not worth your time. Be top of your class and get into a good school... excelling is much better than fitting in.
You have been born into a beautiful religion, trust me. If you desert your heritage just to fit in, man you will regret it later. I see the kids at Gurdwara that keep kesh and I always think man, those guys may take a lot of crap now... but think about the strength of character they are building. That singh in your name is their for a reason, so earn it man. I got complete faith in you.

Fateh!

-W

[.- Prabhjot Singh -.]

thank you for that post Wales85 veerji

[Only five]

Japjeev Singh, I say you read chritropakhyan and see what type of woman you are cutting your hair for. As one poster said, these woman are like light switches. One second your on for them and next second they are looking for another guy and your lights out.

You need to change the people that you hang out with. This is mostly likely one of the problems why you want to cut hair.

Why do we keep hair, because to say to Satguru we as Sikhs love you and will follow your Hukam. If you have ever met a Gursikh they will never give up on a person that is struggling to find God. They will devote time to help him/her and set him in the right direction. The girls your chasing after will drop you in a split second and your going to be stressed out and heart broken because some broad kicked your a55 to the curve.

it's your choice, either keep your hair and Satguru will help you in everyway to get passed this brick wall you have hit or take the way which will set you up for failure no matter what.

There are many people here who can sincerely help you get passed this stage in life with flying colors.

[puneetkaur]

Wahegurooo... its amazing to read the replies of everyone here!
To the original poster, hope you will find inspiration in all that everyone has to say to you..
Here's a beautiful Shabad i thought of sharing :
Guru Maharaj always inspires

ਆਸਾ ॥
Āsā. Asa.
ਕਰਵਤੁ ਭਲਾ ਨ ਕਰਵਟ ਤੇਰੀ ॥
Karvaṯ bẖalā na karvat ṯerī.
To be cut with the saw is better than that thou turnest thy back on me.

ਲਾਗੁ ਗਲੇ ਸੁਨੁ ਬਿਨਤੀ ਮੇਰੀ ॥੧॥
Lāg gale sun binṯī merī. ||1||
Take me to thy bosom and hear my entreaty.

ਹਉ ਵਾਰੀ ਮੁਖੁ ਫੇਰਿ ਪਿਆਰੇ ॥
Ha▫o vārī mukẖ fer pi▫āre.
I am a sacrifice unto thee. Turn thy face towards me, O my beloved.

ਕਰਵਟੁ ਦੇ ਮੋ ਕਉ ਕਾਹੇ ਕਉ ਮਾਰੇ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
Karvat ḏe mo ka▫o kāhe ka▫o māre. ||1|| rahā▫o.
Why doest thou kill me by turning thy back on me? Pause

ਜਉ ਤਨੁ ਚੀਰਹਿ ਅੰਗੁ ਨ ਮੋਰਉ ॥
Ja▫o ṯan cẖīrėh ang na mora▫o.
Even if thou cut my body, I shall not turn away my limb from thee.

ਪਿੰਡੁ ਪਰੈ ਤਉ ਪ੍ਰੀਤਿ ਨ ਤੋਰਉ ॥੨॥
Pind parai ṯa▫o parīṯ na ṯora▫o. ||2||
Even though my body falls, I shall not break my love with thee, even then.

ਹਮ ਤੁਮ ਬੀਚੁ ਭਇਓ ਨਹੀ ਕੋਈ ॥
Ham ṯum bīcẖ bẖa▫i▫o nahī ko▫ī.
Between me and thee, there is not another.

ਤੁਮਹਿ ਸੁ ਕੰਤ ਨਾਰਿ ਹਮ ਸੋਈ ॥੩॥
Ŧumėh so kanṯ nār ham so▫ī. ||3||
Thou art the same Spouse and I the same wife.

ਕਹਤੁ ਕਬੀਰੁ ਸੁਨਹੁ ਰੇ ਲੋਈ ॥
Kahaṯ Kabīr sunhu re lo▫ī.
Says Kabir, hear O Loi, my wife. <a class="dict" href="http://www.srigranth...y?Param=ਅਬ" onmouseover="ddrivetip('iab /i now, this time', 250)" ;="" onmouseout="hideddrivetip()">
ਅਬ ਤੁਮਰੀ ਪਰਤੀਤਿ ਨ ਹੋਈ ॥੪॥੨॥੩੫॥
Ab ṯumrī parṯīṯ na ho▫ī. ||4||2||35||
Now, no reliance can be pleased in thee.

Ang. 484

[hkaurP]

I think its quite inspirational how my younger brother is striving for his hair to grow and he wants to wear Guru Ji's dastaar. He's around your age. He used to cut his hair and now he wants to keep it. And there is another one of my younger brother's at some corner in the world who wants to cut his hair, the gift given to him by his father Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji. Don't make this mistake chote veer. It takes a lot of courage to represent Guru Ji's dastaar.

And if you are really intersted about girls, lemme tell you, many girls fall for your personality. At least the good ones. The ones that fall for your looks only are not good girls that you would want to be around. There are many boys with kesh who "get girls" if that's your motive. Dont waste this beautiful jeevan given to you by Waheguru due to girls. But I suggest that you should keep your hair, keep your rehet strong, do bhagti and you will get shakti to defeat these lustful thoughts you have about girls.

And for your question, "Is having hair mandatory in Sikhism?"then yes it absolutely is. Just take a look at my signature at the bottom and you will get your answers on why it is mandatory.

Rab Rakha

[Akal Warrior]

Japjeev Singh, I say you read chritropakhyan and see what type of woman you are cutting your hair for. As one poster said, these woman are like light switches. One second your on for them and next second they are looking for another guy and your lights out.

You need to change the people that you hang out with. This is mostly likely one of the problems why you want to cut hair.

Why do we keep hair, because to say to Satguru we as Sikhs love you and will follow your Hukam. If you have ever met a Gursikh they will never give up on a person that is struggling to find God. They will devote time to help him/her and set him in the right direction. The girls your chasing after will drop you in a split second and your going to be stressed out and heart broken because some broad kicked your a55 to the curve.

it's your choice, either keep your hair and Satguru will help you in everyway to get passed this brick wall you have hit or take the way which will set you up for failure no matter what.

There are many people here who can sincerely help you get passed this stage in life with flying colors.

Great advice to give to a 14 year old kid! (sarcasm) You think by him reading Charitropakhyan all his problems will be solved? Charitropakhyan requires knowledge and maturity to read, and if a person does not have these qualities, they will probably just get more confused. I think these forums are good, but sometimes people just post the most ridiculous advice that it can lead to more confusion and doubt.

And Shastr's advice on beating the kid up...that'll work. Nothing better than a good beating to make a person love his religion! You guys should stop posting on EVERY single thread because i don't think you have the maturity or knowledge to be giving advice
(neither do I).

[Singhstah]

VahegurooJiKaKhalsaVahegurooJiKiFateh!

Guru Gobind Singh Ji, GOD HIMSELF, keeps his hair and took amrit, how important must it be if GOD himself keeps it? Do you realise some *edit* girl might find you attractive, but the cost of this is losing the blessings of Guru Gobind Singh Ji? As long as we have Guru Ji's blessings we are protected in this life and also in the afterlife, nothing can harm us. But as soon as hair is cut or sikhi is left in some other way, you can't count on this protection or blessings any more. Guru Ji has already written for you who you're wife is going to be, how many friends you are going to have, how easy life is going to be for you. There is nothing that any of us can do that will change that, the only thing we can do is make our life WORSE by disobeying Guru ji.
Remember Guru Ji is the master of all souls and the master of the whole creation, he controls EVERYTHING, ask yourself how can anything become better for you if you turn your back on him?

You are worried about people making fun of you, when Sikhs were given long hair the whole country and government wanted to KILL US. If they didn't have courage and keep their hair then, there would be no Sikhism today. Sikhism isn't about giving into tyranny, and thats what people making fun of you is. Sikhism makes warriors out of normal people, if you want to be a warrior and at the end of your life say you did something, then you can say that you stayed firm like a rock to your beliefs even when the world was against you.

Millions of Sikhs did not undergo torture and death for something thats not mandatory. Sikhs such as bhai taru singh ji who would rather have his scalp removed than allow his hair to be cut



Or the Sahibzades (Guru Ji's sons) aged 6 and 9, who would rather be bricked alive instead of agree to cut hair



None of us are anywhere near the level of any of these Gursikhs, they chose to DIE in horrific ways than cut their hair, who are we to say its not important?


Also would you please mind sharing where you are from.

[whyhellothere]

Do you realise some *edit* girl might find you attractive,

Mate I stopped reading your post at this line.

Charitropakhyan requires knowledge and maturity

Remember maturity doesn't always come with age!