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Relationship Dilemma


22 replies to this topic

#1
_Just somone in love_

_Just somone in love_
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WJKK WJKF

Ive been dating a tamil girl for 6 months and are quite serious.ive never felt this way about anyone in my life. I guess we just clicked and are compatible. I just have a question do these relationships have a future in marriage? We all all know that in asian cultures the families will always stay a big part of the relationship. Anyone have any experience of any problems in these marriages. She said that she's will convert to Sikhsim if that what it takes. She is actually very interrested by Sikhism.

#2
_Good happy_

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You will both have to adapt to each other after marriage. If you can respect one anothers faith then y not.

#3
_Just somone in love_

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Well Yeah I am a open minded person and generally respect all faiths. She is Quite religious to some extent. And I wouldnt want to interfere with these practices. But saying that some maybe go against Sikhsim. And I wouldnt want the kids to follow anything other then Sikhism. I dont mean to sound big headed but Ive been brought to believe in my religion strongly. And I dont take Relgion like its just some ritual. It very important to me.

I guess its not just the couple that has to get on and make the relationship work. But the families can have to do their part. And we know what Asian families are like. Always fighting lol...

#4
HDSH

HDSH

    Tav Charnan Man Rahay Hamaaraa

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If religion is important to you, then don't even think about marrying a non-Sikh. Period.
sBnw aupir ndir pRB qyrI ] iksY QoVI iksY hY GxyrI ] quJ qy bwhir ikCu n hovY gurmuiK soJI pwvixAw ]3]
Your Glance of Grace is on all, O God. Upon some it is bestowed less, and upon others it is bestowed more. Without You, nothing happens at all; through the Guru, such understanding is obtained. ||3||

#5
_dharm_beats_religion_

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If dharam is important to you perhaps you can marry a hindu, but if religion is important to you then I guess not.

#6
_gupt_

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If she is ready to accept sikhism by heart and by this she will not get hurted then its ok to marry her.

But in marriages the main part is of parents........Don't hurt them

#7
xtremesingh18

xtremesingh18

    Nimakh Naa Bisro Tum Ko Har Har

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If your religion was important to you then you wouldn't be going out with her to begin with . break up with her

#8
_Just someone in love_

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Thanks for all the advice.

Well I am having second thoughts about it now. I mean I would rather marry somone who is Sikh to begin with. Becuase we share the same History and culture. But being with my GF has also made me want to learn about other cultures and traditions. I dont know why but before I was with my partner I never really paid much attention to Tamil culture and religion. But now I have took some interest in it.

I guess being close to somone. you naturally get a desire to take an interest in their religion and culture. But we kind of have some stuff in common. She's from Sri Lanka so her community has experienced the civil war ect.
I mean I dont want to want end up regretting it down the line. And finding out that our cultures are just to different and this might cause conflict and resentment.

sometimes i feel that she would be better off with marrying someone from her community and I and I would be more happy marrying someone from my community in the long run.

#9
xtremesingh18

xtremesingh18

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It's nice too see you have acknowledged my advice and taken it on board. Good job OP (sarcasm)

apart from HDSH, the rest of the advice is pathetic. My 10 year old sister could guide you better then them. BREAK UP WITH HER, marry a Sikh. Read the rehat Maryada, in particular the bits about marriage. If you still are persistent in going out with her then I give up.

#10
gurdssingh

gurdssingh

    naabh kamal mehi baedhee rach lae breham giaan ouchaaraa ||

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If the girl is willing to follow Sikhi what is the problem? I mean most people who get married in Gurdwareh these days in UK are just born into a Sikh religion, have no clue about it.

If someone converts to Sikhi and their family are not born Sikhs can she/he not marry a Sikh? I think they should!



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