It's difficult to even say what date means if you are talking about courtship http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Courtship


The opposite is arranged marriage you will find a difference in arranged and forced marriage. Loads of us in the community reject forced marriages. Marriage also consider economic factors for stability and security so in the past people married quick due to money problems, war problems etc. If you are considering marriage I think you would be silly in this day and age not to speak privately with the partner you are considering to marry and at times one meeting is not enough you may need several rushing into it can be terrible can result in divorce and delaying it too long can break it equally. Depends on the culture of where you live, you don't want a pointless act of courtship aswell that just ends up sleeping together and breaking up imagine someone using shaadi.com to do that. Muslims do halal dating where they have a chaperone someone to sit to make sure everything is kosher, halal or chardi khalla.

If you are amritdhari you are obliged to marry another amritdhari so if you have your family introduce you, you should set up meetings always when you go out tell someone where you are going. You don't want the case of abduction, kidnapping and date rape everyone regardless of communities fear that. You will find lust everywhere in different forms in the world, sometimes just thinking about a girl walking, or advertisement, movies, (certain websites), Lust is a selfish act which creates paap and furthers you from yog and mukhti you need selfless acts of true pyare and love.

Some people have odd relationships with their partners of lust it destroys relationships and marriages don't last you need to be genuine to yourself and others. You will find emoitional bonds (moh) worldly attachment all around the world even with friends and family when someone dies you can't move on or you can't move past them and remember maharaj these things inhibit simran. The rehat you should worry about is more your diginitiy, honour and self esteem. Don't be a pervert, don't be a rapist, don't be a hoe - I think loads of people would understand that. Be sincere, genuine, a gentleman, a kind, noble person (a sardar).

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

You remind me of the verse

ਜੇ ਕੋ ਬੋਲੈ ਸਚੁ ਕੂੜਾ ਜਲਿ ਜਾਵਈ ॥

Don't be a MOORAKH, think before writing.

In present times who gets married at 10 or 11 ?

Don't know what goes on in your pind butChild Marriage is illegal (human rights violation).
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Curious if your parents plan to get you arranged then it's better to wait otherwise just go with the flow.
Just keep in mind that everything happens as per God's Will !


Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

By your first comment, it is easy to see you are not mature enough to be discussing this stuff. So marriaging in teen years is pendu world. Before such degrading marks are made, a person should take a Sikh history lesson.

Satguru Sri Guru Teg Bahadur Sahib ji Maharaj was married at the age of 11, Born in 1621, married in 1632.
Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji Maharaj was married at the age of 11, Born in 1666, married in 1677
Satguru Sri Guru Har Rai Sahib ji Maharaj was married at the age of 10, Born in 1630, married in 1640.

You thought your common sense represented the time to get married and recieved a tasty history lesson. When Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji Maharaj would go do ishan did Maharaj have a 3 foot long sword wrapped around his head? Maharaj kept his kirpan on which was wrapped around his Dastar. The size of this Kirpan would have been no bigger than the one Gurmukhs wear today. Again understand the difference between Kirpan and sword.

Here is a link to Taksal Rehat. Have a read and maybe some nirmat would be come upon you.
http://www.damdamita...id=80&Itemid=68

Mr. Warrior, why blame other jathas for the problems of punjab, when it is people like you have destroyed the sharda of Sikhs from Rehat Maryada. First gain some humility and then maybe some understanding will come to you.

Gurbani of Sri Guru Granth Sahib jeeo is superior to any other Bani and Rehat Maryada

So when did your leader Darshan Laal give you the command to shoot his Gurnindak thinking here? Rehat Maryada comes from Gurbani. If no Bani is superior to Satguru Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji Maharaj then go take Sri Jaap Sahib, Sri Chaupai Sahib, Tuvai Parsaad Suvaye, and beginning of Chandi di Vaar out of Gutka which rest at Gurdwaras.

Little kids should not play with matches

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

Actually the appropriate age for marriage is still late teen years.

Ya in pendu world.

So your saying teens in older days were more mature, educated, and financially fit to take on the responsibility than todays 25 year old. If Sikhs would have followed the Khalsa culture from when their kids are born, then by their teens, the kids are very mature. But you have punjabis follow the culture of alcoholism. What do you accept from their kids.

I am saying, in older times due to the absence of t.v, all couples did was have s-e-x for entertainment. In the absence of education and family planning they landed up with dozen kids to raise. And if you come across a single HONEST elder ask him how did he make Money to raise such big families, check the facts-don't follow False Myths !

Keep everything in context. Those couples that live the Gursikh lifestyle do not run into problems. There early learning of Gurbani makes them mature. Those that indulge in lust and get the girl preganant have their own set of problems later. Those kids that don't have been educated in Gurbani will have problems later on. The punjabi with western culture mix that people live by today has clearly shown to cause divorces in a matter of months from the wedding. Funny part is parents hate doing big engagment parties because they know this new punjabi generation will call it off in a split second. They consider their own kids to be a drain on their retirement money. This is what punjabi so called superior culture has come too. Those families that follow the Khalsa culture are living the good life.

Akj jathedar's daughter was after me, she used to sing Shabads in Darbar to get my attention. Came to meet me at Gurdwara without knowledge of her parents but Guru Sahib saved me from these

ਅੰਦਰਹੁ ਝੂਠੇ ਪੈਜ ਬਾਹਰਿ ਦੁਨੀਆ ਅੰਦਰਿ ਫੈਲੁ ॥

Nope never have changed. It is still appropriate to get married in your teens by the Khalsa. If people don't follow that does not mean the Rehat Maryada changed. That means the people changed.

Times have changed, paisa pradhaan !

You should come see how blunt my kirpan is. Show us where in Maryada the Kirpan was longer in size. Also say there was a lenght requirement. When a Sikh doesn't follow the Hukam of Guru Sahib does that mean the Hukam has changed? No that means the Sikh is not following Guru Sahib. The Hukam (Rehat Maryada) stands on Guru Sahib's words not on the action of the Sikh.

You just need Common Sense to know how long was a Kirpan in Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's time. May be those who edited the Rehat forgot to mention it. Now let me ask where in SRM do they mention practice of baptizing infants can you please point that out !

The Khalsa Panth carried swords of various sizes when in battle and on daily basis. But a kirpan is different than a sword. The kirpan is used in instance when kirpa needs to be done. The Kirpan is not like a regular sword that can be pulled out at anytime and be used by anyone, including the enemy. The Khalsa Army went to all lengths to make sure their kirpans are never taken away from them. The kirpan was blessed to the Khalsa Panth by Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji Maharaj, which gives the kirpan the status to liberate (send people into Sachkand) and destroy (send a person to hell). If the Kirpan was a regular sword then Satguru would have not given it a special name. In Shastar Naammala, a Sati or theer or any other weapon used by the Khalsa is not refered to as Kirpan. ONly the sword given at Amrit Sanchar is refered to as kirpan.

Kirpa + Aan

Forget about doing kirpa on others what have your role models or jathas done about protecting Sikh aan in punjab ?

''all talk no action''


If we take your thought process of saying the kirpan is being forced to change in size, then which government is forcing you, or the Sikh not to marry at the age prescribed Rehat Maryada?

''Raaj bina na dharam chale hain dharam bina sab galle malle hain''
Which age is prescribed, kindly enlighten.

I guess you have not read Sri Charitorpakhyan. When Bibian talk to other Singhs, then it is sister to brother, but if people don't, then you can't blame the site. Many people use Gurbani tuk to suit their manmat lifestyle. Do you blame Gurbani now for causing the manmat backing for it? Rehat Maryada has not changed. Many Sikhs have moved away from Rehat Maryada and they are following what you want them to follow the mix of punjabi and western culture, which creates arrogant, lustful, narrow minded, immature adults. If the parents start teaching the Khalsa lifestyle to their kids from birth, then you will see alot of change in how a teen see's the world and understands what is needed to achieve in this life.

Can't blame kids for the wrong teachings and doing of parents.


ਗੁਰੂ ਜਿਨਾ ਕਾ ਅੰਧੁਲਾ ਸਿਖ ਭੀ ਅੰਧੇ ਕਰਮ ਕਰੇਨਿ ॥



The parents have failed to teach their kids. Rehat Maryada waits for Sikhs to come and implement it, so their kids can become mature must faster.

Gurbani of Sri Guru Granth Sahib jeeo is superior to any other Bani and Rehat Maryada.

Will have to start a new topic Gurbani v/s Rehat Maryada (the contradictions) in due time.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

Curious your questions are very valid in this day & age.

In olden days couples were married in their TEENAGE but now 25 years is considered an appropriate age for marriage.

Actually the appropriate age for marriage is still late teen years.

Reason, a person needs to be Educated, Mature and Financially Independent to take on such RESPONSIBILITY.

So your saying teens in older days were more mature, educated, and financially fit to take on the responsibility than todays 25 year old. If Sikhs would have followed the Khalsa culture from when their kids are born, then by their teens, the kids are very mature. But you have punjabis follow the culture of alcoholism. What do you accept from their kids.

Those who get married early have their own set of problems later.

Keep everything in context. Those couples that live the Gursikh lifestyle do not run into problems. There early learning of Gurbani makes them mature. Those that indulge in lust and get the girl preganant have their own set of problems later. Those kids that don't have been educated in Gurbani will have problems later on. The punjabi with western culture mix that people live by today has clearly shown to cause divorces in a matter of months from the wedding. Funny part is parents hate doing big engagment parties because they know this new punjabi generation will call it off in a split second. They consider their own kids to be a drain on their retirement money. This is what punjabi so called superior culture has come too. Those families that follow the Khalsa culture are living the good life.

Khalsa Rehat Maryada is a set of guidelines which have changed over time.

Nope never have changed. It is still appropriate to get married in your teens by the Khalsa. If people don't follow that does not mean the Rehat Maryada changed. That means the people changed.

For instance some jokers argue that our Maryada is authentic then why do they wear small blunt kirpans instead of the Bigger ones !

You should come see how blunt my kirpan is. Show us where in Maryada the Kirpan was longer in size. Also say there was a lenght requirement. When a Sikh doesn't follow the Hukam of Guru Sahib does that mean the Hukam has changed? No that means the Sikh is not following Guru Sahib. The Hukam (Rehat Maryada) stands on Guru Sahib's words not on the action of the Sikh.

Any reasonable person knows that in Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's time there were constant battles so how could Guru Sahib give a command to keep small ones ?


This is a compromise reached by Sikh leaders later on with Govt.

The Khalsa Panth carried swords of various sizes when in battle and on daily basis. But a kirpan is different than a sword. The kirpan is used in instance when kirpa needs to be done. The Kirpan is not like a regular sword that can be pulled out at anytime and be used by anyone, including the enemy. The Khalsa Army went to all lengths to make sure their kirpans are never taken away from them. The kirpan was blessed to the Khalsa Panth by Satguru Sri Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji Maharaj, which gives the kirpan the status to liberate (send people into Sachkand) and destroy (send a person to hell). If the Kirpan was a regular sword then Satguru would have not given it a special name. In Shastar Naammala, a Sati or theer or any other weapon used by the Khalsa is not refered to as Kirpan. ONly the sword given at Amrit Sanchar is refered to as kirpan.

.

So one has to adapt according to the circumstances and prevailing times.

If we take your thought process of saying the kirpan is being forced to change in size, then which government is forcing you, or the Sikh not to marry at the age prescribed Rehat Maryada?

Lastly do you think girls interacting with guys over here is acceptable according to Strict Sikh Code of Conduct and do their parents or husbands know what they read and write over here ?

Guess Not so Please Stop this HYPOCRISY !

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

I guess you have not read Sri Charitorpakhyan. When Bibian talk to other Singhs, then it is sister to brother, but if people don't, then you can't blame the site. Many people use Gurbani tuk to suit their manmat lifestyle. Do you blame Gurbani now for causing the manmat backing for it? Rehat Maryada has not changed. Many Sikhs have moved away from Rehat Maryada and they are following what you want them to follow the mix of punjabi and western culture, which creates arrogant, lustful, narrow minded, immature adults. If the parents start teaching the Khalsa lifestyle to their kids from birth, then you will see alot of change in how a teen see's the world and understands what is needed to achieve in this life.

The parents have failed to teach their kids. Rehat Maryada waits for Sikhs to come and implement it, so their kids can become mature must faster.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

Curious your questions are very valid in this day & age.

In olden days couples were married in their TEENAGE but now 25 years is considered an appropriate age for marriage.

Reason, a person needs to be Educated, Mature and Financially Independent to take on such RESPONSIBILITY.

Those who get married early have their own set of problems later.

Khalsa Rehat Maryada is a set of guidelines which have changed over time.

For instance some jokers argue that our Maryada is authentic then why do they wear small blunt kirpans instead of the Bigger ones !

Any reasonable person knows that in Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's time there were constant battles so how could Guru Sahib give a command to keep small ones ?

This is a compromise reached by Sikh leaders later on with Govt.

So one has to adapt according to the circumstances and prevailing times.

Lastly do you think girls interacting with guys over here is acceptable according to Strict Sikh Code of Conduct and do their parents or husbands know what they read and write over here ?

Guess Not so Please Stop this HYPOCRISY !

Waheguru ji ka khalsa
Waheguru ji ki fateh

1. No , not allowed to date.
2. Yes it would be lust. Pretty much all relationships before marriage are related to lust. Don't see how it wouldn't be lust.

Getting to know a potential marriage partner is advisable... you can go out places together etc ..but with parents knowledge is a good idea...

Showing affection physcally before anand karaj is not allowed and most likely will lead to a bujjar kureit.

You've got to balance the two... Obviously you dnt want to go into a marriage blind not knowing the other person at all... But you dnt want to spend to much time together before marriage that it leads to something innapropriate...

It's a pointless distraction. That love should be focused towards Guru Jee.

1. No
2. Yes. No relationships before marriage.

52 Hukam by Guru Gobind Singh Ji at Nanded Sahib

15)Par-Istri, Ma-Bhain, Dhi-Bhain, kar jaanani. Par Istri da sang nahi karna - Recognize all other women other than your wife as mothers and sisters. Do not engage in marital behavior with them.

ibnw AnMd ibvwh qy Bugqy pr kI joie ] sux isKw gur kih Q~ky myrw isK n soie ]25]
binaa ana(n)dh bivaah thae bhugathae par kee joe || sun sikhaa gur kehi thhaakae maeraa sikh n soe ||25||
Without having Anand Karaj those who have sexual relationships. Listen O' Sikh the Guru states, he is not my Sikh.
Rehatnama Mukhthnama