WildCard

Those guys are awesome! talk about being musically talented!

Oh by the way, the time i went they did ask to see our passports, so be on the safe side and take yours with you if possible

The Niwas is beautiful, i was fortunate enough to stay there when i did Darshan of Darbar Sahib last year. I'll ask around and see if anybody has a contact number, one of my cousins may do.

I think its important to be realistic about these things. Marriage seems to be the primary concern of most young people and rightly so. Look in any group of asian origin, you have young people stuck between two cultures, neither of which seems to fully take care of business. Two generations back people mostly got married wherever they were told and the system of introducing people was working to some extent. Today that is no longer the case. young people are coming to realise in their mid twenties that the system they were told is going to take care of them and facilitate a match for them has fallen to peices because so much has changed in the world in the last 20 years. Suddenly the social networks that should provide reccomendations are finding that they cant vouch for people at all let alone find suitable matches. I myself know of at least 4 Amrit Dhari people (2 Singhs and 2 Bibiya) of decent character who now have passed their mid thirties and are actually going grey, yet there is no sight of a match to be made for them. So what do we say to them? should they now be told that they should marry whoever comes along, tell them beggars cant be choosers and that everything that they invested in in order to qualify for a good match (living a decent lifestyle, getting an education, having successful careers etc) was for nought? Because the elders in the community, and in some cases their own parents are literally saying exactly that... on the other hand others have been challenged by their parents (who are themselves stuck with this broken system) out of sheer frustration that "You go to all these programs, why didnt you find someone yourself?" Some of those people are now effectively saying that if they had known it would come to this they would have taken action themselves when the opportunities were around them and secured a match for themselves. one of them is advising his younger brother at university to not fall into the same trap that he has, to find someone himself and then get the families involved. Some of these people who frowned upon fratenising with members of the opposite sex now lament the fact that they have been left on the shelf because they werent open to opportunities when they appeared. So what are young Sikhs to do? This is a matter of universal concern. Young Sikhs, Hindus and Muslims have all fallen prey to the same problem and it is not something to be taken lightly. Its a constantly recurring theme that keeps rearing its head in one form or another all over message boards like these and is a common theme of conversation for anybody in their twenties. If the old way of doing things isnt working anymore, then there has to be something to take its place. Either the youth themselves have to start facilitating for each other or, the direction alot of us are going in, its going to be everyone fending for themselves. And it is important to add that its not just a problem for young GurSikhs. today that is the state of play across the board. Why is it that despite there being a "system" to facilitate marriage for all of us of asian descent (regardless of religious background), there are speedating events geared especially towards Hindus, Muslims or Sikhs? something has obviously gone horribly wrong somewhere because there are people exploiting this issue and making money out of it through such events. When the original poster said "We should wake up", i agree with him, but in order to tackle this we need to wake up as a community and look at the issue hollistically, its not right to point the finger at the product of this failed system (the confused or dissillusioned youth). If we want to make sure that people adhere to a chaste and morally pure lifestyle, then as a bare minimum they need to be shown that there are clear advantages to them in walking that path. That is to say that a young GurSikh needs to have faith that they are not hamstringing themselves or dealing themselves out of the game by taking the moral high ground. If that can be acheived the rest will fall into place. fix the machine, or get a new one. those are the only real options that are going to make a difference.

Question is, why do they let him touch them? this is a question of the mentality of whoever that group of people is. why are they so disempowered that they think someone can touch them as intimately as that and as openly?

I know some people that used to have a dog called "Tiger".. i dont know who was more confused, the Dog or the people who named it!

WaheGuru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh! Vikramjit Singh Ji, to expect others to pay the same attention and have the same concern for our (or any) circumstance or situation is futile. Each of us has a unique perspective of the world and how long or short our memory is of anyone or anything is directly related to our unique view. just as Mahraj has created us all with unique DNA, unique fingerprints and uniqe dispositions, we each have a unique world view. It is not important that others do not remember, do not concern yourself with that. What is important is that you and your immediate family (your father and siblings) remember. The love that you would have shared as a family is different in both its nature and its intensity than it would be for anybody else in the extended family, so do not judge these people too harshly. when they lose somebody that close, they will remember their own loss and then, just as you are finding now, others will not and they will ask the same question. What counts is that you remember her, what she did for you, what she stood for in your life and how she has influenced your journey. What did she teach you in life and what did she teach you in her passing away? Be grateful for her, all that she taught you, and look for her when you look at ur dad, your siblings, the other people in your life both near and far. look for her in the smiles that you share, the hugs, the comfort and even in the disagreements and arguments. look for her mannerisms in those close to you and i think you will find that the essence of who she was and what she meant to you is not far at all. be strong Veer.