Marriage - "caste Problems"

[PranaamShaheedaNu]

GurFateh to all.

Before I start could I please request that only those members reply that actually have sound advice to give and are not here to ridicule. Thanks

I'm 24 years old, and have been introduced through friends to a girl, (as I told them

I am

Looking for a partner for marriage) the girl and I get on extremely well and both have similar future plans.

I have brought this up with my parents, and they have discarded the idea as she is not from "our caste" as they remind me that we are Jatt and she is a Khatri.

As far as we are both concerned, in line with the tenants of Sikhism we aren't doing anything wrong as the Gurus refused any notion of the caste system. Her parents have no problem at all, mine do.

We are in this situation and don't know what to do, could anyone advise?

GurFateh

[pangaphish]

Sikhi says it doesn't mean anything.

Your parents say it means everything.

It's a choice to make, a lose lose situation...for me it sounds like lose your family or lose the fundamental Sikh principle.

Only you can make that decision.

Do the RIGHT thing brother...

[StarStriker]

GurFateh to all.

Before I start could I please request that only those members reply that actually have sound advice to give and are not here to ridicule. Thanks

I'm 24 years old, and have been introduced through friends to a girl, (as I told them

I am

Looking for a partner for marriage) the girl and I get on extremely well and both have similar future plans.

I have brought this up with my parents, and they have discarded the idea as she is not from "our caste" as they remind me that we are Jatt and she is a Khatri.

As far as we are both concerned, in line with the tenants of Sikhism we aren't doing anything wrong as the Gurus refused any notion of the caste system. Her parents have no problem at all, mine do.

We are in this situation and don't know what to do, could anyone advise?

GurFateh

Tell ur parents that they shud b gratefull u have brought a sikh girl home, n not a hindu/muslim/chinee etc, who wud do besti to their name within the community, surely?

[Koi]

Sikhi says it doesn't mean anything.

Your parents say it means everything.

It's a choice to make, a lose lose situation...for me it sounds like lose your family or lose the fundamental Sikh principle.

Only you can make that decision.

Do the RIGHT thing brother...

Yes, do not dishonour your parents wishes.

[jkvlondon]

Waheguru ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru ji ki Fateh,

Veer ji have you and your intended had amrit ?, because that would make your case stronger as to say jaat is a valid bar to marriage would be equivalent to insulting Khande di pahul as mere Pani . I am sure somebody can give the exact rehitnama quote to back this up to show your folks. In the end do ardas do paat become Guru wale and He will help you always.

[JagsawSingh]

Lots of unkowns here. For example is the original poster an only child ? If that was the case one might understand the mother's wish to gain a daughter she never had etc.

In the end though....our parents can't help but use a little emotional blackmail. It's only temporary though. They soon come round and will, in time, appreciate you marrying a good Sikh girl (assuming of course she is a good one ?)

[PranaamShaheedaNu]

Jagsaw Singh, I'm

Not an only child, I have one younger brother

[JagsawSingh]

Jagsaw Singh, I'm

Not an only child, I have one younger brother

Well then you really want to sit down with your mum and dad and have a heart to heart with them. I know someone above called it a lose lose situation but the way I see it you are in a win win situation. Sit down and talk to them about Sikhi, and how it knows no caste and hopefully they'll learn something from you and embrace the situation. Happy days. :cool2:

If, on the other hand, despite your talk, they remain stubbornly in their caste ways, then join them and remind them how the khatris are, and always have been, far superior to we Jatts and it would be a great honour for your family to gain a "high caste" daughter in law. Happy days. :cool2:

Either way, you can't lose.

[JSinghnz]

Well then you really want to sit down with your mum and dad and have a heart to heart with them. I know someone above called it a lose lose situation but the way I see it you are in a win win situation. Sit down and talk to them about Sikhi, and how it knows no caste and hopefully they'll learn something from you and embrace the situation. Happy days. :cool2:

If, on the other hand, despite your talk, they remain stubbornly in their caste ways, then join them and remind them how the khatris are, and always have been, far superior to we Jatts and it would be a great honour for your family to gain a "high caste" daughter in law. Happy days. :cool2:

Either way, you can't lose.

Hear from our in house caste expert. LOL

[pangaphish]

Hear from our in house caste expert. LOL

Yes...read the post before replying ji.

Only those with genuine advice should bother to reply or post.

Very well done, I'm sure your ridicule is a positive addition to this brothers situation. Way to go??