Leaderboard

Telling a woman to try harder to make her abusive husband change is the most idiotic and dangerous advice you could give. It is becuase of the advice of people like yourself that so many women and families have irreversibly ruined their lives.YOU are perpetuating a harmful and deluded belief system. Maharaj can change anything if they so wish, obviously. But they do not wish for us to sit still and take beatings whilst praying that they might one day stop. A Kaur is sovereign, courageous, and loved by her Father - she has every right to stand up and leave any abusive situation. What would Guru Sahib, or the real Singhs, have said and done? I think they would have instantly gone to sort this douche out but, at the very least, they'd have kept their daughter/ sister safe. And here you are today, telling her to put up with <banned word filter activated> in case things change. Think. Your words have consequences, even on a forum. This is coming not from a "15 year old" "paapu poster", but a paapu who's unfortunately had experience in the matter.

I am well aware of the ill health effects of homosexual acts, just as I am well aware of health effects associated to straight sex if not done safely and in moderation. My use on harmfulness was that there would be a victim from the result of an incestuous relationship i.e. the child. Yes, I can say there was an attack towards homosexuals because their behaviour was likened towards criminals. Either members here do not understand the seriousness of paedophilic crimes or they think homosexuals should be locked up. Either way, they should stay away from young children because their moral judgment is messed up. I would defend anyone if I see someone being unnecessarily attacked. I am still on the topic of homosexuality so there is nothing wrong with stating my opinion on this matter. Regarding those that indulge in homosexual acts while in prison, I am surprised that some people here cannot understand this. If those that indulge in homosexual acts become heterosexual when they come out, it is likely that they were never attracted to men but making the best out of a bad situation like someone here has already stated. They were performing homosexual acts because they were trying to get the closest sexual experience and pleasure, in other words they were masturbating or using a sex-toy and were most probably having thoughts of a woman.

yeah that's true man, sometimes it's tough accepting the will of Waheguru because you feel cheated but you just gotta keep the faith

Two examples of inaction from Gursikhs (one male, one female) that I personally knew who were constantly told to "stick it out" in marriages that were doomed from the very beginning. The first, an incredibly tender and straight-down-the-middle young man, who had his marriage arranged with a Gursikh girl from back home. To cut a long story short she was in love with somebody else from her teenage years, and her lover was already over in the UK on a work permit. Her plan was to piggy-back to the UK via marriage to my friend and then leave him once she was here. And that's exactly what happened. Yet, the poor guy was bombarded with do-gooders telling HIM, "You can't divorce her, it's paap, you've made a promise to Guru Sahib..." when SHE was the one who ran away! "Increase your naam, etc" was the extent of the advice he was offered, whilst another man was most likely pleasuring his wife. Who exactly was this Singh going to remain married to; thin air? Second example, a Gursikh girl, UK born and raised. Again, a very mild-mannered and respectable individual from a no-frills family. This girl had it rough from almost the very next morning of her marriage. Her husband and her mother-in-law were Gursikh, but the father-in-law was not. It was the standard passive-aggression on the part of the MIL at first, which gradually morphed into manipulating the son into believing the girl wasn't doing things correctly in the home. He gradually started to slap her around. The crowning moment was when the girl was doing her evening prayers and the MIL took a bottle of whiskey from her husband's drinks cabinet and poured it over the girl's head as she was reciting her prayers. Yet, people were still offering nuggets of advice such as, "You must try harder! You made a commitment when getting married. Don't you dare walk away from the marriage and spit in the face of your sacred vows." I know the healing power of faith more than most, but in some situations where others are basically beasts in human form, no amount of godliness will ever tame such animals who deceive, abuse, and destroy others.

Hey people, I've heard friends say that they know people who can see aura's, do we believe this in Sikhism?

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2wxe2n_mob-tries-to-assault-sikh-truck-driver_news#from=embediframe These coward hindus thought they were tough lmao.

You're first paragraph is just ridiculous, just because your "friends" are apparently not horny at all, doesn't mean everyone is like them. Plus you don't know what your friends get upto in their spare time There is NO WAY a homosexual can have sex with a female? What about the men who can't come out of the closet and marry a woman to conform? or the teens who sleep with girls prior to coming out? Your thinking is similar to a unedcuated villager.

Making the best out of a bad situation??? LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, too funny. Lets agree to disagree.

Often in times where nothing seems to be going your way, you can lose all hope, it's happened to me, but Waheguru doesn't just up and grant you your desire like that, you need full faith, undying faith and when your faith starts to slip so can your connection with Waheguru. Don't leave Sikhism because of your troubles. The people that get in your way are the ones you need to help create that unbreakable faith by them trying to keep you away from Sikhism you need to resist. Keep your faith in Waheguru, don't get upset or feel depressed because that's what the people who want you to fail want to see. Be strong. Peace

Listen brother, You are who you are, you love Sikhism and don't want to change that, there are women out there who will love you for that. We all are different, just because women might not look at you the way they do to other guys doesn't make you any less of a man and if a woman thinks any less of you because you're a Sikh, let me tell you that woman is not worth your time. Don't let it effect your job or your faith you will find the right woman as long as you be patient. Focus on Waheguru above all else and the rest will fall into place. You say you're "mentally weak", well in life the hard and rough times make you mentally tough, we're not all born as mentally tough, it's the life Waheguru puts in front of us that makes us tough, makes us worthy to hold the name Singh because a Lion isn't called the king of the jungle for nothing. So at the end of the day have faith in Waheguru, love Waheguru and stay strong my brother. Peace

we will be victorious, I have faith in Waheguru and the Guru's that our time will come to put an end to our persecution. WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH

Any budding authors are probably wary of the religious police getting the wrong end of the stick and branding him or her as an apostate or something, lol.

Maharaj condemns the belief in ritual purity throughout Asa Ki Vaar. Eg. the belief that a person is impure because of their caste, for example, and a Brahmin who accidentily touches them must therefore wash themselves. Maharaj also talks about ritual purity in regards to food. It is particularly the Vaishnava Hindu branch which condemned the "impurity" of women due to menstruation, and this is the belief that Maharaj is talking about here - it fits right in with that which Guru Sahib is criticising throughout Asa Ki Vaar.Sources? If you want academic sources I can give them to you, since this formed part of an essay I did. I can send you book names tomorrow, when I'm on my laptop. However, you don't need academics to tell you this. Plently of Sikh sources or parcharaks will know the context of the Bani.

I'm up at around 3 or 4 a.m and listen to prayers from the Harmandir Sahib when they bring Guru Granth Sahib JI out, I try to do the Jaap Ji sahib etc and meditate upon Waheguru's name. I know it's not a lot at all but I'm slowly trying to get better and be able to do more prayer while I'm concentrated

You know, there are quite a lot of imbeciles who mar this forum with their benighted presence. Seasoned veterans of the art of stupidity. The fact that you've managed not only to surpass all these people, but have established yourself as their chieftain after just 13 POSTS is a breathtaking testament to the potency of your craziness. I'm done trying to reason with you. If you wish to continue to believe that you 'schooled' me, go ahead. Your sense of pride is obviously low enough that it desperately needs the boost. I'm content just knowing that a century from now you and your anti-evolution ilk will have disappeared into the gaping maw of history and become the subject of universal ridicule. Rather like you already are.

Kill your thoughts through simran. Focus on the sound of your voice and make a conscious effort to listen. Find sangat depending on where you live: http://mysimran.info/simran-in-your-city/

Waheguru Ji ka khalsa waheguru Ji ki fateh. Which prayers are you reciting? Also waheguru gives to everybody. Nobody really has it easy it just seems that way. By becoming Amritdhaari problems don't go away we ask maharaaj for the blessings to deal with them. Hope this helps.

Without stating the obvious, life is never easy, no matter whom you are. Just look at the lives of the Fifth Guru Sahib and Ninth and Tenth to know that many things happen but we have to accept the Baaana [will] of the almighty. Getting baptised is essential, or why else would Dhan Guru Gobind Singh Nirnakaar Ji take Amrit? who can be more pure than him on this earth? nobody yet he still deemed it necessary for himself to partake in the Amrit consumption. Fateh

these videos cover all aspects of Sikhi and they will help answer your questions Who is a Sikh Part 1 - To be in Gurmat means to: 2 Who is a Sikh Part 2 - How Simran improves your: 3 Who is a Sikh Part 3 - The importance of keepin: 4 Who is a Sikh Part 4 - How Maya can trick us: 5 Who is a Sikh Part 5 - Code of conduct for the : 6 Who is a Sikh Part 6 - Dont get trapped in the : 7 Who is a Sikh Part 7 - Naam: 8 Who is a Sikh Part 8 - Knowledge begins at the : 9 Who is a Sikh Part 9 - Doing simran in gurmat m: 10 Who is a Sikh Part 10 - Do simran to churn Tr: 11 Who is a Sikh Part 11 - In Naam, everything is:

Where did she complain that he asks where she is going? Point that out to me. As far as I know she NEVER said that, what she said is he doesn't let her go anywhere. Is it also a lack of communication that causes him to grab her by the throat? Sooner or later he'll end up getting more physical. Dropping her off at the gurdwara because she wont be intimate with his moronic <banned word filter activated>? Won't be surprised if he tries forcing himself upon her sooner or later. Why don't you read what she is saying, instead of eagerly jumping to attack posters lol.

Ooh! I'm still amazed at the linguistic beauty of the Guru Granth Sahib, quotes like this can make me sit back and think about them for ages haha, thank you again!

Our community always says no to divorce, for one reason or another, then a couple years later they'll be at the dead, battered womans funeral crying. You say go to panj pyare or elders, how on earth can any of them enforce anything and make him stop being physical? And you're give the <banned word filter activated> to much credit to respect her because she is immersed within bani. To the OP, leave before you become another dead victim of spousal abuse, call the police and get out of there. You're lucky to live outside of India, you don't have to rely anyone, not him or your parents, leave whenever go wherever.

It seems like you're waiting for someone to come along and make the tough decisions only you can make. If what you're saying is true (and don't take that the wrong way, but I've been in a few situations where the innocent party was anything but innocent once the other side told their side of the story), what are you waiting for? I don't think your mother has the will to support you if the marriage ends. Your husband clearly thinks you don't have the stomach to do what needs to be done. So, why not confound these people, stand on your own two feet, and regain a bit of respect? I can guarantee you that nobody will ride along for the rescue and make things any easier for you. That's not how these things work unfortunately. You can wait for your husband to become a permanent resident OFF YOUR BACK, or you can spare yourself a lifetime of misery and regret, and bring this situation to an end.

So don't you think he would leave you once he's got permanent status? This is the big question to ask yourself. If he's like this now, what do you expect afterwards? I think he's just waiting to get "pakka" I don't know how the immigration thing works in UK, here in Canada, you can send a letter to immigration telling your story and they know what's happening in your case and can hold on to the status of the person involved. Police records, doctor's medical should be their to support you when it comes to immigration or if something unexpected happens. Stay strong, do ardas. If possible gather courage and report to police for physical abuse. And you should keep your family doctor aware of whats happening with you emotionally and physically. I know it's realy hard, but what are you going to do if he leaves you after getting pakka, as he says.

This is really awful. I wish I could start a campaign against this douche-bag - our community really are a bunch of idiots when it comes to things like this, yet they boast about stupid crap like stopping interfaith marriages. Pathetic. I know it's really difficult. But would returning to live with your family not be an option? Failing that, a friend's house? A women's shelter? Obviously it would be a big decision for you to make, but I want you to know that the option is always there. As your younger sister, I'd also be happy for you to stay at mine for as long as you need (assuming you're in the UK).

on this website you can download the entire Guru Granth Sahib in urdu free along with other sikh books in urduhttp://sikhbookclub.com/books/sikh-books-urdu/1656/1318

Tell yourself its a homosexual act...should do the trick for you

I'm still a teenager (i suppose haha) so I can feel your pain. What Balkeer bhaji said is pretty spot on. Try and minimize the time you spend alone, Masturbation urges can usually come when someone can be "bored" or have nothing to do. Find a hobby and get submerged into it, going out with friends (good sangat) is also a pretty good way to negate that, rather than wasting your time going looking up porn, perhaps get a start on that really long and tedious work (if you're studying) load. Music or even better Gurbani can also help with this. Keep yourself distracted from lustful thoughts. Barricading yourself away is by far the worst thing you can do. I'm not sure how old you are but if you're going into those awkward teenage years, controlling the urge will be a challenge.

First of all, let me say that I respect you for having the humility to openly confess this problem. Personally Veerji, I don't think there's much harm in masturbating very occasionally to relieve stress. If you don't then your semen will emerge of its own accord whilst you are asleep, causing some nuisance and a little mess. However if you are masturbating regularly and incorporating pornography, this can be quite detrimental to your well-being. I used to spend inordinate amounts of time alone in my room watching porn. However I did several things to end this corrosive habit and they were quite effective - - Leave your bedroom door open. The prospect of my grandmother walking in, beholding ungodly horrors and subsequently succumbing to a fatal heart attack pretty much crushed any of my masturbatory plans. - Make your room a positive environment. Have a lot of pictures of the Guru Sahibaan, Mahapurakhs or Gursikhs. Keep gutka sahibs and shastars out in the open. By the end of it, the idea of masturbating in your room will seem very, very unappealing. - Exercise often and hard. It is a good way to dispose of any pent-up energy or frustration. - Simran and Paath, of course. I wish you luck.

Bhenji, I'm really sorry to hear this. This is so wrong. I can't tell you to leave, but I can tell you that you deserve more - there's no doubt about it. You are a Kaur and you had an Anand Karaj to an Amritdhari man who's failed to be a decent husband or Gursikh. You are still a Kaur, and with Guru Sahib by your side you still have the capacity and self respect to cut your way out and come out fighting. I know that you want to make things work. But know that no matter how much you want to work on the marriage, if he remains uncooperative then your efforts are futile. A marriage and your efforts to move forward have to be two-sided - how can he change if he is unwilling to? Don't go silent, don't stop seeing things clearly, don't fall for his manipulation. Threatening suicide is one classic example abusers use to keep the partner trapped in the relationship. I hope you have a family and friends who care for you with whom you talk to this about. Don't become isolated. I'm here too, please feel free to message anytime. And calling the Sikh Helpline is a good idea, whether you want advice or someone to listen.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fateh This is a serious issue you must contact Sikhhelpline http://www.sikhhelpline.com/contact/ Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji ki Fateh

singhni wants to hear a swimming hijab? say whatt!?

Brother, A person is not a Singh or a Kaur simply by appearance. Don't think that those Sikhs who have wronged you are a reflection of your Guru. Guru Sahib is forever yours, forever compassionate, and always ready to take your hand. You are still Their pyaare son, whether you feel that right now or not. Gurbani warns us: a(n)dharahu jhoot(h)ae paij baahar dhuneeaa a(n)dhar fail || Those who are false within, and honorable on the outside, are very common in this world. at(h)asat(h) theerathh jae naavehi outharai naahee mail || Even though they may bathe at the sixty-eight sacred shrines of pilgrimage, still, their filth does not depart. It's unfortunate, but brother, you're not defined by the inability of others to treat you well. You're not defined by your perceived "failures". You are just you, the only version of yourself around, with your own unique path paved out for you. Forget these people, they don't see your light yet. You have the capacity to give to others the love and hope which you want others to give you. You are the very jot of Vaheguru ji, how can you ever think lowly of yourself? I'm here to talk to you, to listen.

You have not failed anyone. At this stage you are reaching out and that takes immense courage. Reaching out when needed is not failure. There is an entire world out there that has far more fundamentally in common with you than the hurtful people of whom you speak. Where are you located? Approximately? Of course as you're aware you can communicate anonymously here.

Waheguru gives punishment, as per: ਪੰਨਾ 1358, ਸਤਰ 3 ਹੇ ਕਾਮੰ ਨਰਕ ਬਿਸ੍ਰਾਮੰ ਬਹੁ ਜੋਨੀ ਭ੍ਰਮਾਵਣਹ ॥ He kāmaʼn narak bisrāmaʼn baho jonī bẖarmāvṇėh. O sexual desire, you lead the mortals to hell; you make them wander in reincarnation through countless species. Waheguru....

Sikhs should ask the sewadars of these organisations on how they can help contribute to them rather than whinging in their arm chairs on how they are no longer doing anything.