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singh181

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  • Birthday 01/01/1979

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  1. Hi, Your question makes sense only and only if these people become amritdharis. If not, then my point stands.
  2. Hey, Your comment has gone wildly off the original debate and have focussed on myself and Kalsingh. We have not ever mentioned anything about cutting hair, so for you to bring this up is a bit crazy and bewildering to me. This is not about people feeling insecure about themselves. This is one of the biggest problems with our religion. We tend to have digs against each other rather than live in peace and harmony. I think we are all agreed that there is a problem with marriage in uk. Is it not time for people just to be honest? People might say don't link all this to religion. Well, the point that most people are missing is (including Amarjit Kaur) the lower the number of girls who agree to marry a Singh (with turban and beard - inbetweeners or not as the case may be), the less chance of future generations of children having turbans and beards. Now you may say - so what as a person with a turban and beard is not always perfect. That may be the case. Guru Gobind Singh Ji did say you will recongnise a Sikh from a crowd of thousands. In the UK, will this still stand to be true in 10/15/20/30 years time.??????? With the comments coming on this site, it may be so as everybody appears to be sleeping into thinking they have comfy lives, the car, the money etc...they have forgotten what sacrifices the Guru Ji's made for the hair and turban and have sought to blame one another and then got intertwinned with points that they sought to make on religion and then at times has got personal. It just shows that we cannot even have a sensible debate. Is the future for UK Sikh's - Mixed marriages, more divorces, westernised individuals. Whites, Blacks/Muslims/Sikhs walking into gurdwaras with mixed children. Now I know the gurdwara is open to people from all cultures and backgrounds, but don't people think we ARE IN DANGER OF LOSING OUR SIKHI. Lets have a proper open debate before its too late.
  3. Hi, Now that you have both made up....lol The original debate seems to have gone a bit stray - my question to you is how many girls do you know who would seriously want their husband to be one who wears and turban and beard as most responses received have been from males....? There are many in betweeners out there - these are not bad people - in fact some are even better than people who show to the outside world something and within themselves are something else. Would be good to have some IN BETWEENER FEMALES comment too?????
  4. Hi Amarjit, You have made some excellent points. But your situation is different to that posed by the original question and the source of the debate. Perhaps you could comment on that? For example, how many girls do you know that would be willing to marry a person with turban and beard (who is amritdhari or not as the case may be)?
  5. What a great comment by Cisco Singh - he has raised the prospect of Sikhs destroying their own religion. Are we all blind that this is happening before our very eyes? Fast forward 20 years, then 40 years (4th generation in UK) - what will it look like? Will many sikhs (well they may even be half afro caribean/half muslim/half white in 20-40 years time) then be embarassed to even associate themselves with our true Guru Ji's. This is the time which will define our future and unless something is done to reverse what is happening, it will be too late. Believe in our Guru Ji's and sacrifices made by them and if you are lucky to be be born into such a great religion, you should not be embarassed about that. Unfortunately, we live in a world where people are forgetting about sikhi, go to gurdwara and then outside of the gurdwara totally disrespect the religion. WJKK WJKF
  6. Hey Penji, I think you are taking this personally and being defensive, unnecessarily. Nobody has aimed any of these comments at you. You may well be the perfect or good sikh girl that others should look up to, I don't know. But what is clear is that you have had the guts to come on here for the record and speak out which is good. Where are the rest of the sikh girls...........! Not all sikh boys are perfect - to the contrary, some do our religion much harm. e.g boys with turban smoking on the street and drink alcohal is not unusual. It's the second generation growing up in the uk and it has gone absolutely crazy - girls and boys thinking they have the money, the cars and not wanting to listen to their parents as to what is good and bad and frankly acting more westernised than the people in the country they live in. You cannot imagine what is going to happen to the 3rd/4th generation. Perhaps, mixed marriages (sikhs and non sikhs - it is happening now). Who knows! Everybody should just wake up. One of the reasons why most people in our religion are soo successful is because they have a sound family life (even if they are religious and non religious). You can even walk into any gurdwara in the UK and speak to any respected elderly indivdual for a view on what has been discussed on here. You may find that the response you get is not one which you (as a british sikh girl) will like or even accept. Your response may be, 'I don't know why I bothered to ask'., but you cannot deny that there is a trend and it is not a good one for our religion. The gurdwara pardans are in denial - many are there for the status and cushy seats. If they speak out on what is happening, then they lose their elected seats so no point discussing with them. In the meantime, more comments from sikh girls are welcome. If you are more comfortable messaging me personally, please feel free to do so. I'm just intrigued by this debate and more comments in general are welcome. WJKK WJKF
  7. Hi all, I agree, it would be nice if we could have a civilised debate and stick to the original question. One thing is clear - if a sikh boy has a turban and beard (amritdhari or non amritdhari), he is in a more difficult position than a clean shaven man. FACT. Secondly, a lot of sikh girls say no without even looking or wanting to enter dialogue with a man with turban and beard. FACT. Third, all this is happening and includes sikh girls brought up in amritdhari families, which for our religion is extremely disturbing - FACT. It means that when future generations of sikhs grow up, the man with turban will be a very small minority in our religion. You do really wonder whether the sacrifices made by our guru's, singh's and singhnian in our historic past is not being acknowledged by this self indulgent and selfish (I would say New Sikh girls) in the UK. It is like they are re-inventing themselves as almost wanting to be as somebody has quoted above (a bit bollywood, a bit sikhi where they want to be), which is ok as they can live their life how they want, but at the end of the day, they should never be in a position where it is embarrasing to walk with a singh or wear a kara (that is just wrong in my opinion). There is a big problem in the UK in our religion so far as marriage is concerned and it appears that sikh girls have contributed to this. I challenge any sikh girl to prove otherwise. Thanks for all your comments btw and the fact that most responses are coming from sikh brothers tells a chilling picture in itself..... WJKK WJKF
  8. Where have all the kuria gone. Only 1 response from a girl. They must have a guilty concious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  9. Thanks for all your responses. Are there any in betweener girls (those that would want to get married to guys with turbans and beards but not amritdhari) out there who would like to have a say and perhaps comment on Kalsingh's comments??? Let's hear it first hand. WJKK WJKF
  10. Hi Wales85, Your thoughts and comments are interesting! It would be good to hear the views of your friends and the 'decent good girls' first hand as my original posting mentioned in-betweeners and non amritdhari people. It appears that the focus in the replies received so far refers to amritdhari boys and some people have gone off the original question. However, I am sure that there are very good decent non amritdhari boys but who have a turban and beard and get judged by that very fact. It would be good to have some feedback and comments from sisters too! Thanks
  11. WJJK WJJF It is becoming ever more apparant that there is a growing trend in the uk that many sikh girls do not actually want to marry with people with turbans and beards (amritdhari and non-amritdhari). In general, I don't know what many of your experiences and would be good to hear from fellow brothers and sisters, but it does appear our religion is going backwards in this respect. Does anybody have any thoughts? What about the in betweeners (those who are not too religious and also not too not religious) but have turban and beard - it appears sikh girls just don't want to know. Is there something inherently defective in the way people are taught about the teachings of our religion in gurdwara's for us to even be having this discussion? Thanks
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