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Everything posted by jkvlondon

  1. These are agurbani word and concepts dictionary , you can look up as you go
  2. Why does it have to be only one way for one sex , there is spectrum of behaviour forboth sexes always have been. Guru Tej Bahadur ji recognised that women when in their true gurmat roop can be considered men's conscience and at worse can destroy a man's faith and rsolve like Hakikat Singh ji's mother.there are plenty of super men in our history butthat are alzo outnumbered by the drunkard lechers.We all have to be careful of all people of dodgy intent . Stay awake, but stay balanced , I've distanced from so many people because they have antigurmat ethics , it's just the times
  3. Amazing how you have so many people against you , you have no responsibility for your actions words or thoughts....you are forced everywhere , I do not remember any man woman or child to force you to come on the forum and drool over muslim men / cleanshaven men. You are responsible for own choices , appe beej app he khao
  4. Err ever read chandi di vaar and chandi charitar ? _Guru pita included that bani prior to chaitropakhyan for what reason? Obviously for certain people who are of a critical and blame slinging nature to get a chance to adjust attitude and see that woman are capable of being holy, righteous , courageous and humble BEFORE reading the other negative side and like typical male attitudez of the time condemn women as a whole. Guru ji has told us to runaway from sinners cynics and the faithless ...i.e. Create distance mentally and physically Guru Pita ji has made explicit the conduct of a guru ka sikh , no violence against women there are creative and easier ways to put People at a distance and to eliminate their influence. My main problem with this situation is the potential for destruction and the possibility of repeat offence since the guy involved is incapable of telling the truth to his folks , he could manipulate a divorce wrecking one girl's life since she would have had his kid and therefore be unlikely for marriage again then his folks will pressure him to marry again for the kid's sake. Not to mention how his child will feel because he/she know they were unwanted. It's tragic that he feels able to do all this and yet be harsh on the innocent parties
  5. Frankly the fact that you do not realise that the outer namona of charitar is a dirty lusty old man says it all, he married for lust and reflected 'virility' and thus opened the door for his innocent son to be accused , the fact he couldn't recognise his own son's truth in his own ahankar says it all. He married to prop up his lust and prestige what did you marry for, to prop up your worldly image also? All the tales are cautionary for ALL
  6. Facts we know 1. Ghandi family known for anti-sikh attitudes 2. Sonia Ghandi has a thriving business looting ancient indian artefacts and selling them abroad 3 that family has spent over two hundred years scheming to get the upperhand on sikhs 4 they had motive opprtunity and method of extracting maximum wealth and history out of sikh's spiritual heart Why would anyone believe they would destroy what they could profit from, they knowthat would be the quickest way to deflate sikhis background golden history and its proof?I believe that there is a stockpile which had beenlisted by gursikhs when it was taken and stored nearby to Darbar Sahib which should be circulated and crossreferenced against and all art sales and auctionsprivate and public worldwide of indian artefacts. The sellersshould be arrested for selling stolen goods and profiteering from genocide under international law.
  7. Down load these they will help Mahan Kosh by Kahn Singh NABHA in english translation: http://sikhbookclub.com/Book/Mahan-Kosh-Vol-1 http://sikhbookclub.com/Book/Mahan-Kosh-Vol-2 http://sikhbookclub.com/Book/Mahan-Kosh-Vol-3 Hope that helps
  8. He lives in India, generalise much... Trouble comes in all shapes, and bro is part of the issue
  9. Bro, Why don't you follow BOS katha series on Japji Sahib JI It will help you understand the meanings better and even their gurmukhi course will help you learn to read gurmukhi, where are you based maybe you have santhiya class nearby ?
  10. Then you need to find ssomething to love or appreciate in her and give that prominence in your mind , thisis the reality of marriage no one's 100% full of unwavering love and admiration all the time, it takes focus on the good and working on the bad together. Sure there will be days when you'll wonder wth you are married everyone does especially girls because so much expectation is piled up, but it is a temporary state of mind.
  11. You never know you may give it away yourself by nonverbal cues, remember 8/10 of all human communication is nonverbal. There is a high hitrate for actual cheating when a woman suspects her man of it .
  12. I suspect she has an inkling that something is up, people talk
  13. This is why I am incredulous at his attitude , he knows that he would never love her but thinks she should feel grateful for being the chadar that saves his family's image . She is the bad one, the stupid one etc etc however he should look on his own sense of entitlement and justification of simply using her body to produce the next generation , can he not find his humanity and show her care, empathy, respect for being the mother of his kid?
  14. Basically the big guy's got the option of leaving her to stew also whilst he turns on his heel and chills elsewhere or invite her to get the first hit in whilst pushing her back on the forehead ( my kid bros used to do this alot when babybbro would get riled) Napolean syndrome's a thing ya know
  15. Sikh simarnis and maley come in all sorts of bead counts , not just 108
  16. He is a dinosaur from an era that thinks slapping a woman's backside should be taken as a compliment... SMH I thought we are sikhs and should listen to Guru ji He said not hit, harass, or swear at a woman EVER ..if you seriously are that triggered by someone who is shorter, weaker and lighter than you i.e. Non competition what does that say about you as a person
  17. Should have guessed , you are never going to look from all sides, you can choose to make things better for all or carry on the downward spiral . She is studying on your Mum's suggestion , so yes she is not available during study time what was wrong in saying assign her responsibilities when she is at home? What is wrong in suggesting you show respect to your elders? What is foolish in saying don't play her games of arguing but rising above it and sticking to better behaviour ? Honestly, you have come here to complain only , expecting people to agree and tell you its OK to be cruel and that is the crux of the matter , it is clear from how you have continually denigrated her family fron before you even got married that you have not changed or given any thought to changing your outlook. She is small potatoes behaviourwise and yet you cannot get your head around that fact ,other people have had worse in their families and have resolved matters amicably ,so I know how bad it could be. That is not feminism that is real world experience and desire to resolve the situation to a better footing. Yes she has been rude TOO and I have not defended her because I do not know her side , but suggested doing some small steps that could change the atmosphere. You have displayed somewhat a misogynistic entitled attitude in the past even to the extent that you expected the other to think of you as special just because you are guy's family I put it down to youthful ignorance and living in India where its constantly the theme that women are dispensible . Nobody's special just for existing... Not men, not women BTW I have three sons and yes I am dealing with possible nou raniaan , but you seem to forget I've been nou for over 23 years and have two bhabhian in my household and further ones in extended family. Women usually are at the coalface of family so have intimate experience of making and also breaking homes, thankfully I was always taught to maintain and mend by my bazurg .
  18. There's a punjabi saying a clap takes two hands tomake. Thadi do haathaan nal vajdi hai .... You all have Played your parts in this , your father did speak in a kaurda way and that triggered the argument, she's probably stressing abour missing her period. FIrst child , studies impacted la la la ...yes she was wrong to take her anger out on your MUm and for making up stuff to get your folks into her familiy's bad books but it is childish retaliation(getting her folks to fight her battles) . I don't know if you were wise to get pregnant so soon after marriage as you both have obviously not gotten over issues and built understanding but too late now. What you interpreted as accusations of hitler like behaviour by your in-laws wasnothing of the sort they approached their family member to go visit as an indirect move to NOT offend you . Imagine if they had come straight to you and started asking questions wouldn't that have been more confrontational and escalating ? They asked the Aunt to go visit because they also probaly don't believe the situation is as bad as your missus portrays remember they lived with her for years. Your Mum needs to lay down the law by giving your missus specific responsibilities in the household. Perhaps expecting her to track pantry and help menu plan every week ,and start cooking meals , I mean she is at home in the evenings and weekends at least . Until she starts doing real housework she will continue acting like a guest. I am guessing your Mum is possesive of the rasoi most Mum's are , plan with her how she wants things to run. Your Mum crying on shoulder is a sign that she is expecting you to be liasion , you need to engagein that task butexplain to your Mum that being too softhearted will only end up with her getting hurt she needs to toughen up a bit. I have already spoken on the mistake of the gold chain ... it will continue to be a point of contention if and only if you let it, a gift is no longer your business once it is given and yet you are all focussed on it, why? you can barely conceal your contempt of her family and yet you question why your missus feels defensive , no one is that stupid that they cannot pick up on your indefensible vibe, rudeness and language , what about your duty to respect them as your own parents? If you cannot do that then don't expect it of your wife. Sikhi demands it of BOTH of you, so get with the program, they are entitled to worry about their daughter,maybe you don't realise how many nasty people there are out there it's natural for them to be worried; be forgiving and reassure them. You are not the only family to have a nou who is slightly dodgy, yes they can try to play the victim but the way outof that is be better and stick to decent behaviour don't engage in her spats just rise above that behaviour , Mum toughen up, stop calling to work, Dad don't speak harshly but firmly , and you stop be prejudiced against her folks , visit them , talk to them . If you become visible for them and they can form their own opinion then her manipulative powers will be eliminated. As a family sing from same songsheet , be decent but not pushovers,ensure your child comes into a happy home
  19. Maybe you don't realise it but sikhs aren't as stuck on superstitions as other faiths , do some paat great , do some more fantastic , no set numbers are considered lucky, no special days etc
  20. Thing is we don't believe the importande of 108bead mala, besides the verbal diarhoea gives it away
  21. Don't have to wait imran is giving pannaa to afghani talibanis and has released pakistani ones from prison.
  22. Well Canada has offered to take them in as refugees no questions asked so itwould cost of relocating and resttling them into jobs
  23. jkvlondon

    How to stop drinking

    I'm going from internal gurmat value system rather than outer bhes , these days any jaspreet, gurmeet and harjinder can play dress up and fool folks .Besides many forms of addiction to this world's sideshow
  24. jkvlondon

    How to stop drinking

    Somebody truly sikh wouldn't want to see their brothers or sisters fall down the rabbit hole of addiction ...only scumbags misusing the title to cover their failings

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