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Sangat Jio, If you're an Amritdhari great. If Keshdhari good. Keep on doing what YOU'RE doing. I know a close friend of my father. She, her husband and their father are all practising Sikhs (their dad passed away and these two are late 50's). However, I am ashamed and saddened to say this, they boasted great lengths of being Amritdhaaris, so much so they would literally force and compel others into taking Amrit. Many reading this may be picturing they put a sword/ shotgun to a mona/ Keshdhaari's head and threatened to them to take Amrit... DON'T WORRY! Wasn't that dramatic. The woman's a close friend of my father, due to Business reasons they often would see one another. But the meeting's reduced greatly today. Anyways I do not know about my father but my mum? She felt forced into having taken amrit about 20 years ago. She had to endure "Your husband's amritdhaari why aren't you?" Apart from the friend many more other old buddias were also an influence like this on to my mum. Now, tough hearted women can deal with such people that force them. Okay once, twice you may tell someone to go get baptised but constantly??? THEN the tough hearted women/ men has to bring out her tough side and shout and yell at them to "Stop pestering me!" or "Am warning you, stop forcing me!" In a loud and clear voice. Unfortunately, my mum was not that tough hearted and carried on listening, hoping one day they'd stop... But no. My mum too ended up taking Amrit. Today my mum talks about leaving Amrit behind but she feels she cannot (scared of after death more than husband). At the same time she might? My mum's in a dilemma. My mum had told my father to keep hair but at least don't take Amrit. He took Amrit. More than the woman and her husband, the woman's father in law was the WORST! Any monis that came to him during house prayer sessions he would not even look them in the eye, just sit their with a big frown and hope the monis left. He treated moni kids in the same manner. He qualified himself as "Anyone wishing me to even smile on them must keep hair." The clever folks never or hardly attended house prayers. My father had made every effort to attend ALL functions and took my unwilling to go mum. END OF THE DAY AFTER THEIR FATHER DIED... Slowly all the grandsons (aged young kids and the then teens) cut all their hair. Nearly all grandsons are moni/ trimmed beards. Only one granddaughter is practising and one granddaughter HAS CUT ALL HER GAIR AND MARRIED A WHITE MAN!!! I REPEAT SHE MARRIED A WHITE MAN!!! THIS IS THE FRIEND'S VERY OWN DAUGHTER!!!! SANGAT JIO! Let this be a lesson for showing so much Ahankar. OKAY! If you wish to tell others just tell them once to take Amrit. If you really want to tell then hold programs at the Gurdwara/ become like a Giani ji or a techer where you take out time explaining Sikhi and Amrit DO IT IN A NICE WAY! The effected Sangat will have so much kirpa where they take Amrit thanks to you. You taught them, gave them reasons. But the way these 3 did it? They JUST stated to take Amrit to anyone. LOOK WHERE THEIR EGO GOT THEM! Today these 2 don't dare mention to anyone to take Amrit. After all their kid's fiesta they stopped stating the obvious of Amrit, long hairs and "What if you die tomorrow?" emotional blackmails. REQUEST! If you want others to take Amrit and feel the need to tell them hold programs of Katha and Kirtan at the gurdwara. If sangat turns up it means they're already interested in Sangat, Simran and seva. Teach them about the 10 Guru's, translate to them the Guru Granth Sahib, talk about Amrit, talk about society and Brahm Giania da jeevan in a discussion session. IF they're taken Amrit/ kept hair fantastic. If not just think "Hey, with Akaal Purkh's kirpa I am merely doing my part and they'll take care of the rest." Don't get saddened seeing the SAME mona walk up 10 years into the sangat and think "Does this person even pay attention to my katha?" I was ever so fortunate to have such a teacher. I was inspired to take Amrit and not compelled. Even today I feel happy and with Kirpa I keep doing what am doing. The reason I walked into the katha program was because it as in English, many other youths were there and the Gurdwara gave the platform where katha was held in English by the teacher, we learned about Seva, Gurbani's hukmnama was translated and discussion of Sikh History was told. THIS IS ONE WAY OF TELLING OTHERS ABOUT AMRIT, BUT SHOULD THEY TAKE IT OR NOT TAKE IT AND STILL DO SANGAT, SIMRAN AND SEVA SHOULD BE LEFT UP TO THEM!!! Let's face it, NO ONE can make you happy. Ok so you tell a mona "Keep hair," they have. You then say "Take Amrit," they have. Do you suppose you'll find ANY santokh?? A few months later "Are you doing your Nitnem, no??" Neither you will be santokh and instead you'll feel sad! Then their's the teacher! He see's the same mona walk in ten years and he'll feel pleased that this guy's at least getting Sangat and Simran (Minimum) and how he's not the only guy here, but many others kept hair and many others took Amrit because of the program held. SANGAT JIO! Telling others about Amrit is a HUGE responsibility and there's a best way of doing it and an ahankari's way of doing it, which'll get YOU and the people you forced nowhere in life.
Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh! Why is it hard to inspire others to live a Gurmukh lifestyle, when it's meant to be good for people? Also why don't most people learn lovingly, but only want to learn when there is something else involved, (pressure to learn). I hope everyone improves and tries to follow Guru Sahib, but sometimes it just fails. How can I improve myself, so that more people are willing to listen? I feel my heart is in the right place, but nothing happens. Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh!