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  1. Do I bujjur kehhit if these thinks we're put on u and they had to been removen and they pulled hair out and u couldn't do anything
  2. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa ,Waheguru Ji ki Fateh Everyone, I have a doubt. I read somewhere in the forums that we dnt cut hair because they are living(living cells) where as we cut extended nails because they are non living(dead cells). What if a sikh is born with a rare mutation ,example : a extra hand or something which is living but of no use.(the cases you see on discovery or national geography). Is he/she allowed to cut(obviously through operation) it? Now one more thing,Due to hair at my private parts I have got a fungal infection.Doctor simply said the reason was water clogging after bath. And no matter whatever you do it wont dry(i cant simply use a dryer)..and according to the forums I see you should not shave hairs no matter what. But whats the point when these living part is the cause of killing of other living cells plus the rashes and itch. Regards, Confused Sikh
  3. Dear Sangat Ji, I am a frequent reader of this site but I seldom post, and am for the first time ever starting a new thread. I do so because I feel that we can perhaps openly examine as a community some of the root causes of many of the challenges that posters present here, especially in the Gupt section. I post here instead of "Whats Happening" as there may be those who wish to contribute but not reveal their identities. The topics that keep coming up over and over include: Women and issues with hair (and the fact that it affects their chances of marriage) Youngsters and romantic relationships (how soon they wish to start their journeys toward Ghristi Jeevan) Depression (having nobody to talk to or share their feelings with) Isolation (lack of sangat and the impact of social politics and dynamics) Each of these can be reduced to the last one on the list: Isolation or loneliness. The need for human contact, identity and belonging is recognised as paramount to healthy human development. The impact of being "under socialised" or isolated can lead to all kinds of psychological issues. In fact, the affects of isolation in the young can lead to "Failure to Thrive" syndrome where people cannot function or catch up with their "normal" counterparts. Today we exist in greater numbers that ever in human history, have vastly greater social connections than we have ever had, (this site is one example, and of course there is the social media that surrounds us), yet it seems that humans have never been lonelier. It has also been proposed that while we have more connections, the relationships have become shallower and less meaningful as they become greater in number. We might have 300 facebook friends and 300 phone contacts but feel like we have nobody to talk to. At the same time we naturally make efforts to be part of some or other social "tribe", and try to identify and be accepted by them by acting, talking and dressing alike. The human social instincts that we have been blessed with drive us to join with others and also drives our fear of rejection. In ancient times, social rejection (from your tribe or village) was a sure death sentence. We could not survive without the protection of our social group and its function to sustain members of the greater whole. Today, rejection is unlikely to result in death yet we still fear it as such. Loss of friends, the end of a marriage, the rejection of a proposal, rejection by those we would keep Sangat with, a breakdown in communication or relations with family, we may fear and treat any of these and react in a manner as if it is "the end of the world" (read death). Fear of being alone seems to be a great driver of the challenges that keep coming up for the Sangat on this site and beyond. Women who fear rejection due to their facial or body hair are afraid that they will end up unwed and alone (or with someone who does not fit the ideal picture they might have of a husband). Youngsters drawn to the rose tinted fantasy of romantic relationships are also trying to get a head start in the race to find a partner, again for fear of ending up alone. We all want to be close to others, to have understanding and to be appreciated by someone that will find us to be worthy. If we do not have this acceptance and appreciation, we face the terrifying prospect of not only a lonely life, but death at a genetic level as there are no children to carry on our biological heritage. Parents desire the respect of their children. Those who are bullied for being different wish that they would be accepted just like others are instead of being socially rejected. All human beings want to find their place in the world. And if we feel that those needs are not being fulfilled, we end up feeling isolated and depressed. Depression is so ubiquitous now that I was told that one Chardi Kala Gursikh said to one of the Singhs in their Sangat that "People come to us claiming that they have been attacked by black magic, that they do not understand what is happening to them, when in fact they are suffering from depression". They said that Mahraj describe it in baani as "Mann Ka Taap" or "disease of the mind". And why not. For someone who doesn't know what a panic attack, or a bipolar disorder is, a sudden shift in their equilibrium can be terrifying and seem supernatural. They may develop agoraphobia, claustrophobia or any one of numerous symptoms, as result of feelings of isolation and loneliness which lead them to depression. It is important to mention that isolation doesn't have to mean physical isolation. We can feel isolated within Sangat, within the family, even within a marriage. When faced with depression people can behave in destructive manners, i.e using the five vices of Kaam, Krodh, Lobh, Moh and Hankaar or addictions such as alcohol or drugs to try to protect themselves from the symptoms of depression. Then, we often see posts of people confessing their guilt and doing a virtual Peshi before the Sangat here, asking if Mahraj will ever forgive them, or posting that they have lost faith as they feel isolated even from Mahraj. The truth is depression is a mental illness. It has symptoms and those symptoms can be treated to correct the chemical imbalances that drive this illness. Further, it needn't be a cause of shame, any more than having the flu should cause us to be ashamed. For those who are currently facing depression I would like to add that there IS light at the end of the tunnel and there are ways of combating this. Different methods work for different people and there will be a combination of methods that will work for you. So Sangat ji, I invite you to share ways, both spiritual and practical that we might combat depression and its symptoms. I know some members will say "Do more Paath" and others will say "Get some exercise", I think it would be especially useful if those who themselves have faced or are dealing with depression to share the solutions that they have found and applied on their own journeys. I am hoping that in the advice that is shared members of the Sangat, wherever they are on their spiritual journey, will find inspiration and tools to carve their own path to well being.
  4. Guest

    Hair and not overdiscussed

    WJKK WJKF Jio, I have been amritdhari for a few yrs now and of I don't pluck off my facial hair I will grow a beard. When I did not touch it in the early days I was laughed at and even in my wedding I was ridiculed. I don't want to carry on commiting a bujer kureit and know best advice would be from the panj pyare but to any Gursikh - Shall I take my kirpan off (pray that one day I CAN have it with me again) but still keep keski, kara and kachera becuase these I need and have the strength to keep. Thanks. WJKK WJKF.
  5. Guest

    Hair health

    Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa,Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh Sangat Ji I used to have thick and lush hair but in the recent months my hair has become really thin.Is there any solutions to it?
  6. Hello, can anybody tell me how to tie a FIGHT PROOF dastaar for martial arts like kick boxing , thai boxing etc ... How do I tie it the best so it hardly get loose or fell off? Furthermore I would prefer to make thejura in the back , because if someone hits the joora , the pulling is too hard... Please some input and serious help.
  7. I think there is a need for central topics, on key issues which affect most sikh old and young alike. There are specific cases which can be discussed individually, however most people just look for general advice on the issue and it takes too long to find individual topics, where there are fantastic bits of advice, but its time to put it all together - which will help us all! This may be better in the gupt section? One such topic is off, Keeping Kes – common questions: “importance of keeping kes” “dealing with kes related issues” etc Post any advice/tips, inspirational stories that will help us stay in the form that the Guru wanted us to be in, and remain attached to Maharaj’s charan and not Mayas!
  8. Guest

    The Issue Of Hair

    Hey All, I am a young Sikh about 18 years old. I keep long hair, and my whole life I have been questioning this practice. Sometime I would forget about the issue, sometimes I would think about it a lot and for a period I didn't think about it at all. However, now the thoughts have returned and I can't stop thinking about it. I have been reading up on Sikhism, and am currently reading The Sikhs by Kushwant Singh, some of you may know it. I am quoting this from the book, pp 39,: "Several theories have been advanced to explain the innovation of growing hair and the beard. It has been suggested that this was not an innovation at all and that Guru Gobind Singh's predecessors had all conformed to the tradition of Indian ascetics, who never cut their hair or beards. By making it obligatory for his followers, the Guru intended to emphasize the ideal of ascetic saintliness which he enjoined his followers. He wanted them to be soldier saints. Another version is that, prior to launching on this venture, Gobind had spent a long time invoking the blessings of Durga, the Hindu goddess of destruction. Since she was always portrayed with long unshorn tresses, the Guru believed that in deference to his patron goddess he and his followers should also leave their hair unshorn. A simpler and more plausible explanation is that in preparing his men against the Muslims, Guru Gobind Singh had to take account of the somewhat awesome aspect of the hirsute (means hairy) tribesmen from the North-west Frontier, who kept their long hair loose on their shoulders and let their beards grow. He made it a rule for his followers to do likewise sot hat appearance would no longer terrify. It is also likely that by having his followers wear emblems which made them easily recognizable, the Guru wanted to raise a body of men who would not be able to deny their faith when questioned, but whose external appearance would invite persecution and breed courage to resist it." Another paragraph relating to the issue of hair, pp 63, "The affinity with Hinduism explain both the Sikh drift away from Islamic associations and the pattern of Sikh reformation movements, which sought to maintain Sikh identity distinct from the Hindu. It also explains the Sikh attachment to external forms and symbols, which came progressively to have a more sociological than a religious significance. They became symbolic of belonging to a group and not necessarily of observing its religious ordinances" The paragraphs quoted above, tell me that the issue of hair was a matter of necessity of the time, and where it was required in those times is no longer needed. We are no longer in war, and sorry but I don't need more problems in my life "by inviting persecution", you don't need locks of hair to breed courage. Religion comes from inside, not from how you dress. Furthermore, these paragraphs tell me that the maintaining of long hair was a social construction rather than a religious "ordinance". Moreover, it was implemented because Sikhism was drifting towards Hindu practices, and the Guru wanted to make sure that we were distinct externally, but in practice during those days Sikhs were following many Hindu practices, which is why he wanted to make us different. Unfortunately, this has confirmed my belief that hair is not needed in Sikhism. I was looking for reasons to keep long hair, but this only tells me otherwise. My Dad has told me that if I want to cut my hair I have to give him a 1 year notice, I think I will. During this time I will research more on Sikhism and talk to Sikhs, to make sure that my decision. Please, everyone, share your thoughts on what I have said, and on the paragraphs I have quoted. This is a difficult decision for me.
  9. VJKK VJKF I am a 19 year old boy Sikh living in the UK and I have an issue when it comes to the topic of my dhari. It’s not that anybody says anything to me anymore it’s just that I don’t feel comfortable with it. I don’t feel like myself. I feel have to think twice before I do anything becasue I may give Sikhs a bad name. I feel like a hypocrite. I’ve talked to my family about shaving my dhari and everytime it comes up my Mum gets upset and so does my brother so to keep everyone happy I do what they want me to do and not shave. But I feel that this is emotional blackmail and that in the end I have no choice, I’m being treated like a puppet and they are pulling the strings. To make matters worse my relatives think that me and my brother are really religious and are going to end up being Amritdharis, all because my Mum told them that me and my brother are going to take Amrit. I know that this is the case with my brother as he is into Sikhi and wants to take Amrit, but I am nowhere near ready. Saying this sometimes I do feel comfortable with my dhari. I do understand the importance of Kes, or well at least I think I do. But majority of the time I regret to say that I don’t feel comfortable and that I am keeping it because of my mother. I am in a dilemma. Do I keep my dhari despite being uncomfortable with it just to keep everyone happy and so that relatives don’t say anything to my parents, OR do I do what I want and end up upsetting people? I would appreciate some advice as I am really confused. It’s been like this for 3 years now and is beginning to stress me out. Many thanks in advance. VJKK VJKF
  10. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh Guru Roop Sangat Jeo, Just finished digitising this well-researched book by S. Gurcharanjit Singh Lamba. Although written as an open letter to monay and Sikhs who prefer to wear caps, etc instead of turban, it is equally inspiring for dastar/dumalla wearing kesdharis as well. Please do have a read jeo Download this book from SikhSangat: http://www.scribd.co...jit-Singh-Lamba Dhanvaad jeo! :happytyper:
  11. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh Guru Roop Sangat Jeo, Gurprasad, here is a small booklet in English by Bhai Sahib Bhai Randhir Singh Ji on the importance of hair. Basically, it is a transcript of dialogue that took place between Bhai Sahib and the Superintendent of the Jail he was imprisoned in. Hopefully, it will of some use to those who have not read it yet Download from SikhSangat Scribd: http://www.scribd.co...b-Randhir-Singh Dhanvaad jeo!
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