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  1. WJKK WJKF Hello everyone, I have been in a relationship with this guy for 6 years. I am now 23 years old and thinking of marriage. I don’t believe in caste and neither does he. My family come from a Jatt background and his family are chamar. My family do strongly believe in caste, but I was not brought up around it. I didn’t even know about the caste system or different castes until 3 years into my relationship with my boyfriend. He doesn’t have Singh in his name, but I always thought this was because he isn’t apart of the Khalsa. When we first met, he told me he was a Sikh and that was enough for me. I am a Sikh too and have always wanted a Sikh life partner. 3 years into the relationship I learnt about his caste. Even then, I still believed he was a Sikh, so it meant no difference to me. I told my mum about our relationship this year and she asked about his caste. I told her he is a chamar and she told me how they have a different Gurdwara and believe in the Guru Ravidass. I spoke to my boyfriend about this and he told me his family go to a gurdwara that believes in Guru Ravidass and Guru Nanak Dev Ji. They read out of the Guru Granth Sahib Ji and they perform the anand karaj as a wedding ceremony. I have been looking more into what he believes and I’m very confused as to whether he is a Sikh or not. I was hoping someone may know more about this topic and can advise me whether we would be able to do anand karaj in the gurdwara?
  2. Guest

    Advise me plz

    Satsriakal I am of 29, married since 2013 having daughter of 5 years.there were many conflicts or ups and downs in my marriage. I had fights. I regret in front of my husband, convinced him repeatedly to run this marriage and for the sake of it I had to bear oaths or so to get his confidence so that he could trust me and could not give divorce. It doesn't mean that I deceived after having his confidence back. Things didn't get totally normal at all rather I am living in the fear that he may leave me anytime and in any way. Now at present he shows his rigidness and says i would not tolerate you (me) I apologised always whether I was at fault or not. He now abuses, threatens as well just for the sake of getting separate. I totally bow down in front of him but couldn't help showing my anger in all this but not always just 3 times out of ten. Mostly I tolerate says him that I ll tolerate but he doesn't bother now. He is insisted on to have divorce. I have been living in this fear since after getting married that he may not leave me. I always prayed baba ji waheguru ji for this. Told him that my internal feelings won't die for him even after getting separate but he doesn't listen. It was love n intercaste marriage marriage. I do path japji sahib, shabad hzare, ardas. I believe in god but in this situation I get sometimes tired and feels that waheguru is punishing me for something. I convince my husband a lot. I love him a lot but he is very egoistic even though he does nitnem daily but scolds me badly and is only after divorce. Sometimes I fear that he might have another relationship with someone as he dose not share anything with me, tries to hide his chats and everything while doing on phone. Don't know what to do. There are not any second marriage plans in my mind at all i told him this too but of no use. I can't even leave my daughter behind if this happenes. MyParents told me to leave her with my in laws and with husband. I am not financially sound enough to take care of her but feels helpless in this situation. He is not even bothering of taking my daughter from him. I am very upset where should I keep my daughter if it happens? They are well sound to take care of her. But this thought makes me feel culprit. My inner consciousness doesn't suggest me leaving my daughter with his dad. I still keep requesting him not to take divorce but he is rigid. He knows my weak financial position my weak will power n all thus takes advantage of these. I still pray waheguru to bring him back to me and to happy married life but he doesn't understand this. Please suggest me something and advise me what should I do? I am getting double minded and unable to take any decision.
  3. Hi all, I am a Sikh girl born and brought up in England and ive been in a relationship with my best friend and the love of my life for the past 6years. Now, he was born in India but moved to England when he was very young, so raised here too. We are hoping to get married however the issue is that we share the same nanake (mums village), i actually only realised that this was considered taboo a little while ago. We have traced back our families to has far back as possible and in no way are we related. Were not of the same caste either, however this is not a problem as neither of us or the families believe in caste. He actually has no family there anymore, but my mama and his family do live there. The issue is my mama being against the idea (we have not told him yet, but my mum reckons he would definately oppose) as this will be looked down upon in the village. I guess i just wanted to know what everyones thoughts were on this matter. I mean from my limited knowledge, what ive heard is that being raised in the pind everyone around you was considered as a brother/sister? This did not necessarily mean they are blood related. To me, i just dont get the issue especially since neither me or him live there or intend too. Thank you for reading and hope to hear your views soon
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