Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'gloomy'.
Found 1 result
As you all are probably aware that I am engaged to this girl . However lately I am feeling gloomy since yesterday i think because for some reason I feel sad that I am marrying for lifetime to someone who I am not attracted to . I feel a big void in my life and as if in that void there can't be anything except pain and sorrow. Whenever me and my fiance talk to each other over phone, I never feel like intimacy , I feel like when will this call end , because it gets so odd and I don't know what to talk next. I feel like I fool myself into believing i like talking to her , however perhaps I don't . Or is it because we're not used to talking to each other yet. She lives in punjab and I am in mumbai. On the contrary talking to my male friends is fun and its not scary or anything . On other hand sometimes i feel like I am cheating this girl and keeping her in dark and god is going to punish me big for this I don't want to destroy any girl's life , I hope to satisfy her in every way a husband can -- however I doubt the bedroom part sometimes . I feel like how will I live with a girl I have no bonding with for a lifetime . Sometimes I question my decisions, other time I feel they're right because my parents are happy with her and I had little other option anyways. I certainly don't feel like an excited happy youngster about to be married. Its more like a rite of passage for me , a part of my monotonous life . And I have no idea what else to do . I don't even feel like I can go back now . I have moved beyond that point.