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  1. first of all , this is NO joke thread or any topix like thread. This is a serious. Well I have to admit that I am a bad Sikh - I watched porn and was somehow addicted for more than 4 years now.. I know there is nothing to be proud of and I feel ashamed . But due to Maharaj I managed now to stay away from all these "lustful" things in this society. I hate this society - every where is sex - from little you are forced to see such things.. really . I guess if there werent such things - I would never fall into this "addiction" . Anyway.... Now I am clean for about 1Month - and trust me it was REALLY hard. I did everything to avoid lustful thoughts and things and seeing woman in wrong way ( its hard cause most of them even attract us guys with short pants etc.. but thats not the topic) Well now I must say I feel very strong and clean - I keep saying myself "Mann jithe jagg Jeet" and it works - but I start to notice "physical problems" , like my intestinal making trouble and my testicles are feel "heavy" , like they are full or smth - there is such a pressure and I have cramps.. I dont know why! I didnt touched myself since 1 month , why all of this is happening now??!? I thought I have overcome that shitty Kaam... and I thought i can control it ( I know i cant kill it , because its a part of human being - but I want to control it) The Problem why I am posting this here as gupt is - that I dont want to go to a doctor. The reasons: 1. I feel ashamed of me 2. Maybe there is a woman dr. and it all will go worse - I dont want that - I still not feel that i conquer that. the battle goes on you know.. 3. I would NEVER tell my parents even if I die ( punjabi ... you know) I try to handle it myself .. have you guys ANY tips? I googled alot and searched the internet but there is nothing ABOUT abstinence only about SEX.. people are mad ... they say you have to "realease " the pressure etc- but I dont want to! This is a fight between me and my Paapi mann - I am trying to get the control over FULLY. So can you guys please help me? Or any dr.. here? Thank you..
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