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Found 48 results

  1. Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji Ki Fateh I am a 20 year old girl living in Canada with my parents. A few years ago, we went to visit family back in India where I met my childhood bestfriend who I grew up playing with (they were our neighbors). When I came back to Canada, we started talking and became really close. When my parents found out I talk to him, they got extremely mad, threatened to kick me out of the house, and said I was gonna ruin their “izzat” in society. I don’t understand what I am doing wrong. I only lived in India for a few years of my life so how is this wrong? My dad says that everyone in same pind are siblings... but we are not related in any way, I am pretty sure my grandparents moved to this pind when they were younger from another place. I have been talking to him for 2 years now and we are each other’s happy place. I don’t know how I get my parents to understand, I have no one to talk to about this. Don’t know what to do. Just found this page, someone please help :(
  2. Guest

    Feel like dying

    Sat sri Akal ji I am in biggest dilemma of my Life.Recently I got engaged with my parents wish, At that time I was in such a pressure that I have to say yes to a Girl.But later I felt I did wrong.I didn’t have feeling for the girl, I tried my best to fall in love with her and get attached.Regularly did Simran and ardas so that Waheguru show me the way.But Im depressed now.The girl is nice but doesn’t match me in looks and nature ,her family is good.My family and girl’s family are very happy.Girl is in love with me but I have no feelings for her. Now I can neither call of the engagement as I can’t see the families and girl in pain, Im very much depressed as I can’t fake love nd how can I spend the whole life with her ,Im in depression , my mental and physical health is highly effected. Now I feel like ending my life is the only solution as I can’t go both ways. I feel like dying .Plzzz suggest.
  3. I need help regarding my dilemma. I met a transgender woman at a social event a few weeks ago and she told me I was very attractive and wanted to go out on a date with me. I told her she was a nice person but I am not attracted to transgender women. She then got furious and accused me of trans-phobia. A week after meeting her, she got a hold of my work place and started sending emails to my co-workers and boss saying that I am a pervert. What should I do?
  4. Waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh sangat ji! I have been coming to this forum to read about various things but this is the first time I'm posting anything, and it happens to be a request for the sangat's help on my dilemma. I (24, male, non-amritdhaari) have been in a relationship with a non-Sikh girl for the past 1 year and 8 months. I have never been in any other relationship, neither have I ever thought I would ever be. I in fact used to think it is something not destined for me and I was content with having an arranged marriage as well. But I happened to meet this girl. I have always thought that this is the girl i want to marry and she too sees me as her future husband. I have been interested in Sikhi and wanting to grow my Sikhi since about the age of 18, trying to gain knowledge about it, but I never really was inclined to keep a rehat. It was until AFTER 1.25 years of ALREADY having been in this relationship, that with Guru's kirpa I realized that I need to actually maintain a rehat actively and I had this inner urge to follow Guru Sahib. Now coming to my dilemma, I honestly love this girl and she loves me. But now that I'm trying to live my life the way our Guru has taught us, I have this doubt whether this relationship will be acceptable to Guru Sahib. Had I been already on the path of Sikhi seriously BEFORE meeting her, I would probably not look at any girl with those kind of prospects in mind. But I'm well past that stage now, and I do not want to hurt her by leaving her abruptly saying "my Guru does not want me to marry a Non-Sikh". She has supported me and does not have any qualms with me being serious within my SIkhi even though I was not "like this" when she started liking me. I want to earn the blessings of Guru maharaj but I do not know whether Guru Sahib would be happy with their Sikh breaking an innocent heart. My question is whether Guru maharaj deems it just to break the heart of the one you love if it is for the purpose of keeping rehit. I want to reiterate the fact that I had been in love with her BEFORE I started trying to keep a rehat seriously. I want to hear what advice the sangat has for me. HUMBLY REQUEST YOU TO PLEASE PROVIDE GURBANI PANGTIS OR HISTORICAL EVIDENCES, WHICH YOU BASE YOUR ADVICE UPON. I would like to request you to be polite in your words if possible. Waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh!
  5. Guest

    love some one

    waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguruji ki fateh im a sikh boy loving a hindu girl i cant live without her plz help me waheguru ji . i want to marry with her only please waheguru ji do something i cant live with her
  6. Who is at my door? He said, "Who is at my door?" I said, "Your humble servant." He said, "What business do you have?" I said, "To greet you, 0 Lord." He said, "How long will you journey on?" I said, "Until you stop me." He said, "How long will you boil in the fire?" I said, "Until I am pure. "This is my oath of love. For the sake of love I gave up wealth and position." He said, "You have pleaded your case but you have no witness." I said, "My tears are my witness; the pallor of my face is my proof.' He said, "Your witness has no credibility; your eyes are too wet to see." I said, "By the splendor of your justice my eyes are clear and faultless." He said, "What do you seek?" I said, "To have you as my constant friend." He said, "What do you want from me?" I said, "Your abundant grace." He said, "Who was your companion on the 'ourney? I said, "The thought of you, 0 King." He said, "What called you here?" I said, "The fragrance of your wine." He said, "What brings you the most fulfillment?" I said, "The company of the Emperor." He said, "What do you find there?" I said, "A hundred miracles." He said, "Why is the palace deserted?" I said, "They all fear the thief." He said, "Who is the thief?" I said, "The one who keeps me from -you. He said, "Where is there safety?" I said, "In service and renunciation." He said, "What is there to renounce?" I said, "The hope of salvation." He said, "Where is there calamity?" I said, "In the presence of your love." He said, "How do you benefit from this life?" I said, "By keeping true to myself Now it is time for silence. If I told you about His true essence You would fly from your self and be gone, and neither door nor roof could hold you back! Rumi - In the Arms of the Beloved, Jonathan Star Jeremy P. Tarcher/Putnam, New York 1997 Ý
  7. Vjkk Vjkf, Sorry for how long this is in advance I'm really struggling and could do with some advice. quite a few years ago I lost my mother to cancer. After she passed away I didnt think about her too much because I guess it was easier to block out the pain rather than think about her condition deteriorating and no longer being here also I didnt have any stresses of life at the time and so it didnt hit me that hard then. about 3/4 years later as I started working harder I started becoming more stressed and this is when depression and anxiety hit me. After a few months I started to take anti depressants and then I spiraled out of control completely. I overdosed multiple times, I self harmed drank smoke at times. I was also gambling heavily. During this period I wasnt taking the medication properly and I pushed my close family away. I harassed a girl which made me feel 100 times worse as I felt so guilty and eventually got in trouble with the law. I have gotten much better over time as I was advised I was misdiagnosed and shouldn't have been given those anti depressants especially which were such a high dosage. I havent drank/smoke or gambled for over a year or so. My relationships with my immediate family have gotten better over time also thankfully. I know myself deep within that despite some of my bad actions/choices it wasn't really me so I've gotten better at forgiving myself. However I'm still affected as I don't have any friends now my family all have wives/husbands and kids and I can't talk to my dad about how I feel as he is from India and he doesnt understand emotions. i dont know who to talk to and I keep hoping that this relationship I had with this girl will get better over time. She is now married but I didnt really care about that I was just happy that she was initially regularly communicating with me during my initial depression stage. She has completely blocked me off and i'm not allowed to contact her. I used to know her initially from Saturday school and had multiple friends in common. When I was struggling I was just really hoping that I could always help her or support her when ever I needed because I saw her in such a positive light. That harassing was due to me being sorry and wanting her to realise that i wasnt in the right frame of mind. I've never fallen out with anyone before this and the fact that i know she gets a long with other people i know makes me feel weird now. I constantly think of her and miss her which I know sounds wrong but its my depression kicking in telling me there is something wrong with me. I dont view her in any other way than a sister but as I've caused her a lot of stress I care about her more and every time she hurts me its like I think this isn't really her and she is only putting an act on because her parents don't want me to have anything to do with her. I know I should spend more time dedicating myself to sikhi but a part of me feels angry and upset and alone. Growing up in an Amritdhari family and going to keertan programmes when I was younger I've always had a wish to take Amrit hence why i've never cut my hair/beard off. I only know japji sahib which i was taught by mummy ji to do but I have an issue whereby I dont fully do it e.g. sometimes I would just listen to and I want to Amrit someday but when I start reading Jaap Sahib after 6-7 mins I struggle to continue and feel like its dragging on. I do simran when I wake up and at night. What would you recommend I do? Am I a bad person for still thinking/hoping this relationship with this girl would become better and I would feel better about myself? Is this attachment even though I have no desire to spend my life with her and it hurts badly when I think about it? I'd appreciate any advice you can give. Vjkk Vjkf
  8. What is love? Is it just some emotions that you develop for someone when you get attached to them. Romantic love in particular. There are married users on here who might be able to answer, maybe ...
  9. Guest

    Trouble in marriage

    Satshriakal ji sareya nu! Im a 27 yr old married woman. Its been 2and a half years of my marriage. And it was against the will of my family. I stay alone cos me and my husband have alot of issues and troubles with each other ever since we got married. We had a 3 year long relationship before we got married and it's been 6 years now that we're together. But due to some past bad experiences and things that took place it seems we have an intensive amount of hatred towards each other now and thus we are thinking of filing a divorce. As much as i want to save this marriage, i also know it isn't a very sane idea. I believe he is seeing another woman out of our wedlock who is driving him crazy and thus, he has lost all love, compassion and humanity towards me. The marriage has also got so abusive both physically and verbally. I still love him though so is there a path i can do to save my marriage and get him back on the right track. I also think someone might have done something to him or brainwashed him. Not sure! It's causing me alot of depression
  10. I got married to my husband one year ago, but i left him only a few months later because he was mentally ill. I got married to him because they had a big house. Now i am at my own house. But I dont know if it was right to leave him. We already divorced. Was it a sin? Or was it right to leave him if i was not happy?
  11. Im destroyed. I thought that my boyfriend loved me. He always showed me love and after a year he said he wanted to marry me, we were already thinking about our wedding. He said he wanted to have children with me and be a happy family. I have no father so this was so important to me. We were happy. I truly love him, l thought l was the luckiest girl in the world because we truly seemed to be in love with each other. I found my boyfriend in bed with another woman. I'm destroyed. l need help. My heart is totally broken. Please, help me. Sorry x my English. Im afraid that my heart will never be the same again. I feel like lve lost my heart and soul. I pray Vaheguroo who is my only real father husband bestfriend and savior. But lm afraid to loose my mind. It hurts too so much that lve thought about death.
  12. Guest

    Love someone

    I m going through hard situation. I love a guy and he loves me too unconditionally. I want to marry him . Unfortunately my parents are not accepting just because he does not have the "status" my family has. Though he earns well and has a pure soul. More important thing is we have great understanding. With him, I feel more close to that Almighty. I know we will be happy together. I don't know how to convince my parents. I really have faith in waheguru. I m praying continously and reciting gurbani . I m kind to everyone. Sometimes I really feel negative about whole situation . I want him in my life and want my parents to be happy for us. What to do?
  13. SSA, I am a 30 year old sikh man. Married a few years back to my loving wife Wanted to know is contraceptive use unnatural in sikhism? Since it doesn't lead to childbirth . I know adultery is prohibited and is sin but is having contraception sex with your wife a sin too?
  14. Guest

    Fallen for a gursikh

    I've been married for years. My husband and I were blessed with Amrit and have children. Our relationship isn't bad but it's never been what I've wanted. There was always somthing missing. And by accident I've met somone, a gursikh who's so bless and in turn knows the consequences of a forbidden love . and I think I've fallen in love and they feel the same. What can I do. I don't want to live if I can't live with him. This is more than infatuation. The way I feel... I'd take the churasee lakh smiling in hopes we can be each other's in another life.
  15. My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse .i still believed that my husband loved me I can't let go of the feeling of love towards him My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse and making false criminal charges on me just after 6 months of our marriage.. I was married here and came from India and was confined at home for 6 months..there were many daily instances of differential treatment with me and of abuse with me daily..i still believed that my husband loved me but after he put me through the most horrible situation, i still can't let go fo the feeling fo love towards him..everyone is saying I am saved by Waheguru but why do i still want to be with..i still want to talk to him once..i was thrown out of their house in a demeaning way and still i have feelings for him..why? What should i do...he has applied for divorce too and i dont want to divorce him..i love him truly and i have no one to go back to..my parents are not alive..am homeless in a foreign country..why did he do this to me after all this sikhi talk at his home and i was to take Amrit with him on this Baisakhi..why is this happening?
  16. Hello, I am not sure if my previous post was successful but my name is Simran and I have fallen in love with a muslim man. I want to marry him but I'm unsure of the reaction I will receive when introducing a muslim man to my family. He is 24 and I am 23. I would really appreciate your views on an interfaith marriage, more specifically a sikh-muslim marriage, and any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. Simran.
  17. I fell in love with a singhni about 5 months ago and I still have feelings for her but I have not told her about this nor do I want to carry out my love through actions to her such as going out as sikhi and maharaj tells us not to. Please tell me if this is wrong that I have these feelings and what should I do? (She The same age as me, goes to the same gurdwara, lives in my area, and thinks the same about me about going out and we both think going out and carrying out actions in love is wrong, but dont get confused i don't know if she feels the same)
  18. Fateh. Does this happen to everyone. I know whats right and wrong but still blindly do it. I know I'll go to hell for a kurehet but carry on. The first time I do it guilt takes over but then get used to it. Sometimes I tell myself not to think cus dwelling won't be a solution. I try justify the worst things to myself. I try switch my mind off just so im not upset but once I started something it's just easier to carry on. Somedays I struggle too much. If certain things hadn't happened id be fine. Events lead on to other things. Thats no excuse for me but reason and now it gets worse and I get worse. Message to people out there I mean this from the bottom of my heart, love yourself because then your world cannot crush. Love maharaj and anyone or anything in the way is an obstacle it's kaljug. I don't want any human except the really bad people to ever be in my situation. If you are upset try not to be reckless. People read gurbani daily and we should but the truth is that only when you face a difficulty will you realise where you stand spiritually. Is it bad somedays I get angry at God. We say 'karam asandra khet..' but what if the 'karam' was not your fault and someone else plays mind games. Lets not believe in blame as such but somebody else has been evil and used you physically mentally etc and that person has changed you. God must realise that. Thanks for reading. Sometimes I need to just need to see things in a different light. Am I totally in the wrong for getting corrupted and losing faith because of a huge gursikh who I thought was 'mr right' amd enjoyed hurting me. And is it normal to want revenge and hate and all that. Thank you.
  19. i had a crush on a girl but problem is that I am not sure weather i really love her. what to do i don't undetstand.
  20. There is a girl that i believe i truly love. I have tried not to love her, for the sake of not becoming attached, but i cannot stop my love for her. She is a christian girl and she is the perfect one for me. But i have taken a hukamnama and Guru sahib says: Sorat'h, Third Mehla: Serving the True Guru, the divine melody wells up within, and one is blessed with wisdom and salvation. The True Name of the Lord comes to abide in the mind, and through the Name, one merges in the Name. ||1|| Without the True Guru, the whole world is insane. The blind, self-willed manmukhs do not realize the Word of the Shabad; they are deluded by false doubts. ||Pause|| The three-faced Maya had led them astray in doubt, and they are snared by the noose of egotism. Birth and death hang over their heads, and being reborn from the womb, they suffer in pain. ||2|| The three qualities permeate the whole world; acting in ego, it loses its honor. But one who becomes Gurmukh comes to realize the fourth state of celestial bliss; he finds peace through the Name of the Lord. ||3|| The three qualities are all Yours, O Lord; You Yourself created them. Whatever You do, comes to pass. O Nanak, through the Lord's Name, one is emancipated; through the Shabad, he is rid of egotism. ||4||12|| I do not know what to do but please help me friends!!
  21. ਗੁਰ ਪਰਸਾਦੀ ਮਨੁ ਭਇਆ ਨਿਰਮਲੁ ਜਿਨਾ ਭਾਣਾ ਭਾਵਏ ॥ गुर परसादी मनु भइआ निरमलु जिना भाणा भावए ॥ Gur parsādī man bẖa▫i▫ā nirmal jinā bẖāṇā bẖāv▫e. By Guru's grace, Immaculate becomes the mind of those, to whom the Lord's will is agreeable. ਕਹੈ ਨਾਨਕੁ ਜਿਸੁ ਦੇਹਿ ਪਿਆਰੇ ਸੋਈ ਜਨੁ ਪਾਵਏ ॥੮॥ कहै नानकु जिसु देहि पिआरे सोई जनु पावए ॥८॥ Kahai Nānak jis ḏėh pi▫āre so▫ī jan pāv▫e. ||8|| Says Nanak, O Love; that person alone obtains bliss whom Thou give. SGGS Ang 918 ?? Dhan Dhan Guru Amardas ji
  22. Guest

    Merging Back Into God

    Merging back into God is the story for every soul, No matter what she is experiencingin life. She will merge back into God whether it be today or tomorrow. This is the way it was written by her Husband Lord. Instagram : Gurpal_1
  23. WJKK WJKF I'm going to be talking about a very sensitive topic so please bear with me, I don't think there's anyone else that I can talk to about this issue. So I met a girl a few months ago and we became best friends, and soon enough we realized that we are both in love with each other and want to get married, which is great. However, the issue is the mistake(s) she has made in her past. She had a boyfriend with whom she was in a living relationship with, although she's living in a foreign country, she belongs to strict Sikh family from India, so she hasn't told anyone else about her previous relationship except me. She cries sometimes because of her mistakes and also tells me that she's not worthy of me and that I deserve/can find someone better than her. She also says that she will be the "..luckiest girl in the world" if we get married. She told me that she can't handle another heart break, that she doesn't want her dreams to be broken again. I get really angry, sad, upset, worried. .. about her past sometimes, simply because I have waited for her all my life and I expected the same, but what's done in the past cannot be undone, and she also has many regrets. She has also made some other mistakes in her past that I cannot discuss here.... Please don't get me wrong, but I do sometimes feel like 'getting even' by breaking up with her and marrying another girl; that has waited for me just as I have waited for her. It's just that I can't imagine the love of my life loosing her virginity to another guy and then to have 'done it' countless times with him, it upsets me and hurts me probably more than it hurts her. I still love her with all my heart and can't imagine my life without her. So I usually try to convince myself to think about the beautiful future we can have together. This is not something that I can share with my parents, because they will completely disagree with our marriage, so in a way I will also be lying to my parents by not telling them. I can tell that she loves me a lot. Her previous boyfriend took great advantage of her innocence and then walked away, got married to another girl. It was his idea to be in a "living relationship" in the first place and initially she refused, but eventually she gave in. So I'm crushed between love and her past now, I am really confused, I want to give her all the happiness in the world, but at the same time I feel that what she has done is wrong, and I shouldn't have to suffer for it. She cannot live without me and I can't live without her either. Please guide me, provide me with your views, I really need some help in order to make the right decision. .. . . I'll pray to Waheguru for all your help. Thank you. Bhul chuk maaf. WJKK WJKF
  24. A poem I wrote. Sharing with the mighty sangat. Thank you. Memories Remember me in my memories, I feel no resemblance yet I stem from these. These parasites upon the land. Refusing to elevate, hand in hand. As the ocean melts into the sand, so I stand, on this path sword in hand. I battle my foes and share my prose and follow Your guiding light. I will send back the darkness and become Master of the night. These words are only possible, if I am One with Me. Otherwise there would be traits attached, of personality. This reality is so fickle that it trembles under my gaze. I am the essence that I feel, I am the receiver of my praise. I am the hole which I dig, a worthless snivelling pig. I am the butterfly upon escape, from the cocoon of its fate. I am the crocodile and the carcass that it eats. I am the carpenter, the protection on my feet. I stand alone sometimes, sometimes I stand with all. The only thing that is certain, with Me, I will never fall. Remember me in my memories, I feel no resemblance yet I stem from these. These parasites upon the land. Refusing to elevate, hand in hand. As the ocean melts into the sand, so I stand, on this path sword in hand. I battle my foes and share my prose and follow your guiding light. I will send back the darkness and become Master of the night.
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