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Hello to everyone, I am new here, and decided to ask for your help. I am a white woman, involved with a Sikh man. I've met him in India, since he was my driver 4 years ago. In the begining everything was fine. I moved to India to be with this man. I've met his family, he is one of 3 brothers, these people ( 4 adults and 4 kids) are very nice, they treat me like a family member, we see each other almost every day, I love them with all my heart. Unfortunately I have a few issues with the "driver". This man is the only one "westernized" Sikh in his family- no beard, no turban, no bangle...he switched from Sikh look and tries his best to behave like a western man Why?- he claims he gets more western tourists. OK, whatever... Here is what brings me trouble, and I don't know anymore what to think about him: 1- he refuses to speak English with me, although if he wants to, he is capable of doing so ( I don't know Punjabi well enough) 2 -he limits himself to saying to me "hello" in the morning and "hello" in the evening. 3 -he never says my name, instead he calls me "yes". It really gets on my nerves. He says my name very rarely, he never introduces me properly to people we meet at functions etc 4 -if he says something, he speaks Punjabi and he is laughing in my face( I suspect he is telling some nasty stuff, just to boost his ego(?), make me upset...if I ask what he said, he laughs even more, this attitude drives me mad, why he does it, I have no idea). 5 -he is always grumpy, silent, even to his family members - he orders everybody around. I do not let him, so maybe because of that, he barely talks to me in English. 6 -he is very materialistic, it looks like he stays with me only for money ( when he droved me around Rajasthan etc, he requested " a big tip"). 7-when I give his family a gift, he says "Sikh people never take gifts". What is wrong with whom? Me or him? Any suggestions what to do with this man? I love him, although I question myself what for? He says he loves me very much and he asked me to marry him. But witnessing all these things I listed, is this real love? I am scared. What future will look like, if he does these things now? Do Sikh men behave like that towards women? I really doubt. I know another Sikh families and I never saw this kind of behaviour. Or maybe he does it because I am a white woman? I am gettting more and more confused, frustrated. I try to improve this relationship since 3 years, but he gives me impression that he is oblivious, and there is nothing wrong with him.. If not with him, what then is wrong with me? I am not a talkative type of a person, I do not talk too much, I even keep quiet for hours and hours, (he seems to like it), which is not healthy, but I am loosing my patience. Am I missing something what is in Sikh culture? How the women in Sikh families behave? Are they always quiet, obedient, doing what they are supposed to do, without blinking their eye? I am pretty often with his family and I see how women behave-they are repectful towards their husbands, but they have a right to express themselves. I love this culture and religion, that's what keeps me still with that man. I am trying my best, but maybe I miss on something. Your help will be very appreciated.

I am a Sikh, and I cut my hair. I understand about our hair, they are our roots of Sikhism, and when we cut the "roots" we lose generations, and I agree with that. Well, I just got a question, and its just that, will god get mad at me for cutting my hair?