Urgent!

[Guest crying]

:umm: :umm:

I am in a very BIG dilemna!!!

I dont want to let go of My REhat and Amrit. A situation has arised where I have to get married and it turns iout that these guys are not looking for Amrit Dharis... they think this guy is the best for me, coz they know his family. I have no other choice... even not willingly, I wont go into details but I have to get married(I just cant explain it) I DONT WANT To let go off my Sikhi. This guy is not Amritdhari and I feel like I m gonna give the greatest happiness of my life away. My ardaas to Waheguru is to show me the right way... Im confused, I have to get married very soon due and If I dont do something soon, I m gonna end up with this guy.

oNE sIDE its the parents and one side is Amrit which has given me and is giving me alot. i DONT WANt to marry this guy but my mom says that if I do, I can make him Amrit Dhari and thats the biggest "Punn".

I heard that once you marry a non-Amrit Shuk, you break your Rehat right away.

Please help, I just want to cry now, I love the way I am. I love simplicity, I love my Dastaar(ohh and they are trying to take mine off :lol: ), I love my Sikhi. There is nothing better than searching for the Great Lord. I dont want to let go off the wonderful joys that I enjoy whenever He Talks to me. I should do more Simran, but right now I m in total sadness. Even thinking of Parting from my joyous life of Sangat, Simran is destroying me. I have exams, work but its getting too much to stress over stuff like this. Waht can i DO??

[Dhan Teri Sikhi]

Waheguru Jee Ka Khalsa

Waheguru Jee Kee Fateh

I really feel for you as to the situation you must be going through, if you are amritdhari you will want to marry an amritdhari so that you can progress spiritually with the other person, you will want similar goals in life.

You need to speak to this guy to find out what he wants in life, what is important to him, is he willing to take Amrit in the future. Does he keep other rehats i.e. is he vegetarian, not drink, not cut his hair etc? Is the rest of his family religious?

If the guy is not interested in Sikhi, once you get married to him, the guy or his family may not allow you to go the Gurdwara, do Sangat etc, may not like you doing your paath or simran etc and for someone who is in love with Waheguru Jee and wants to search for him, you will find it very difficult to cope with your married life. You need to think carefully about what you want because marriage is a committment for life. Talk to your parents and the guy about how you feel.

Bhenji just do Ardas to Waheguru Jee that he helps you through this difficult dilemma and guides you as to what is right.

As to your mum saying make him Amritdhari and it being the biggest "Punn" - Amrit is not something that can be forced upon someone, the pyaas for Amrit and the desire to form a relationship with Guru Jee has to develop within an individual. It only happens with Guru Jee's kirpa.

Feel free to PM me if you would like to discuss

Waheguru Jee Ka Khalsa

Waheguru Jee Kee Fateh

[Guest Guest]

Firstly you should be aware it is against Maryada for a Amritdhari to marry a non-Amritdhari. It is not acceptable and you would have broken your Amrit if you marry him. There is no beating around the bush on this issue.

You should not marry him. There is no absolute compulsion in any circumstances. There is always a way to resolve issues. Put your foot down with your parents/whoever else is pressuring you. It doesn't matter what the ramifications are; Guru Sahib will do his Kirpa if you strive to keep your relationship with him intact.

Talk to older Gursikhs in your area who you can trust; this is probably not the best place to resolve these issues. But the bottom line is you should not be forced in to marriage and as a Khalsa you should not feel powerless to stop anything.

[Guest Guest]

an amritdharhi cant marry a non. Otherwise the non must state a time persiod in guruus hazoori with in which time he will take amrit.

[Gurpreet Singh]

i may be able to help you out bhenji...pm me

[Jaspaul Singh]

which area are you from ji ? please pm me as well ..

[guruji's_student]

ure panj pyaareh sed for you to marry an dmairthdari.. so u wud be breaking ure rehit SIMPLE AS !! sikhi comes first

[japmans]

tell that to her parents who clearly don't give a $@#$E

[SSM]

well cough cough but i dont get why u cant talk to ur parents and tell them ur not getting married full stop.

why dont u talk to the guy abt how he feels and if he thinks that he is ready to take amrit then wait till he does before u say the yes, if that is what he has been reaching and hoping for b4 cos maybe he is more religious than u think and plus he must have agreed to marry knowing what ur like with keski etc so i dont see why he should have a problem.

and punn is good but taking keski off isnt lol it aint funny actually,

well i wont say PM me, got no advice to give but let us know if ur ok .

just stand up for urself girl and say ur attached to ur turban and it aint coming off regardless of what they say or do.

[Guest Guest]

I have picked up one thing since i have been following my Guru, and it is simply:

Guru Ji puts big tests infront of us, the closer you wish to be the bigger the test.

I haven't found the answer as to how to deal with them.

If i can help i will. feel free to email me on lowest_of_low@yahoo.co.uk