A Question!

[proud_to_be_singhni]

Here is a scenario.....

Now suppose you getting married and your significant other half wants to have a reception after the anand karaj and you don't.

Then what?

What do you do? You both get on, you wanna still marry but this.....

So, what would you do???

:music:

[curious_man]

hmmm.....

complications at the very first day of wedding

anywys.... whts wrong in a reception??

r we not allowed??

[japmans]

some people are against having receptions. i don't believe you're not "allowed".... i mean, we've seen that there's been such events in history (see the Bibi Baghel Kaur shaheedi story posted in sikh sakhian), so i don't believe historically it wasn't done.

just some people prefer to not have a reception, and may favour a keertan program instead or summ'n.

[Pheena]

Here is a scenario.....

Now suppose you getting married and your significant other half wants to have a reception after the anand karaj and you don't.

Then what?

What do you do? You both get on, you wanna still marry but this.....

So, what would you do???

    :music:

142043[/snapback]

Perhaps it would be helpful giving a better advice if we knew the reasons for you not wanting a reception.

but here is a general answer.

Compromise. The Husband has just as much right to have a Reception after the

wedding as the wife has the right to refuse to have one. Perhaps you guys can compromise on the type of event that you guys want held at the reception or find a common ground on the things you don't want to have and want to have and he do the same. Who knows maybe you will actually enjoy. Sometimes you will have to step back and sometimes he will have to.

[curious_man]

................ ptbs will have a fight on first day of wedding ...bahahahahaha

ain't i mean!!

..... well behn... as pheena said.. this relation is very sensitive... all abt compromise and trust.... if ure hubby wants to have a reception.... well discuss y he wants?... and y u dont want !!! when both ure views r in front....

select the common ones... remember set theory in math... intersection of sets.... bahahahaha

sorryy i m not serious..

[Trust1]

if ure hubby wants to have a reception.... well discuss y he wants?... and y u dont want !!! when both ure views r in front....

hmm...evryones replying as if bhenji here is the 1 getting married...

am i missing something?

[SSM]

cant u just have the reception, nothing wrong eating nice samosas hehe

well, i would have thought thats quite a big difference, it says a lot about both ppl, they obviously like spending their time differently as in he likes parties and she perhaps doesnt or at least not at her expense lol.

well i think if its for religious reasons then ok otherwise u need to give in to what the other person wants to do.

if what the other person wants is not seriouslya aginst sikhi then both should do things for one another.

so lets have party.

and if he likes receptions then it mite not be fair to just stop him unless it seriously affects her in some way.

are u prepared to do things with the other person that they enjoy too?

hope i made sense, i did to myself at least *blush*

[Guest Guest]

also a reception does not have to involve the 'typical' stuff; i went to one where they had no alcohol, no meat etc and no bhangra/hindi music - all food was vegetarian/egg free etc and they had a gatka display, played some kirtan in the back ground and the bride and groom cut a cake and all that other stuff like having pictures taken with all the relatives feeding them etc

[proud_to_be_singhni]

Here is a scenario.....

Now suppose you getting married and your significant other half wants to have a reception after the anand karaj and you don't.

Then what?

What do you do? You both get on, you wanna still marry but this.....

So, what would you do???

    :music:

142043[/snapback]

Perhaps it would be helpful giving a better advice if we knew the reasons for you not wanting a reception.

but here is a general answer.

Compromise. The Husband has just as much right to have a Reception after the

wedding as the wife has the right to refuse to have one. Perhaps you guys can compromise on the type of event that you guys want held at the reception or find a common ground on the things you don't want to have and want to have and he do the same. Who knows maybe you will actually enjoy. Sometimes you will have to step back and sometimes he will have to.

142056[/snapback]

erm....the person in question who doesnt want the reception (no hints!) ...iz because she feels its not appropriate considering she never goes to receptions/parties at any1 elses wedding and stays at darbar hall or goes home to help after everyone has come back etc.....the noise, music, dancing iz not her scene at all and wud most probably upset her.

She wants simple wedding, kirtan and then lovely langar with a get together at home....no parties etc.

But saying that she loves and also respects her "to be"....so she stuck! How can she compromise??

anyone????

[Guest Guest]

If the lifestyle of one is Keertan and Gurbani and the other is partying and music, then they may be deluded into thinking they are in "love" but in terms of values, principles and lifestyles, the couple clearly don't match up. Perhaps they should reconsider marriage and find their other half based upon common values rather than the short term illusion of love/lust.

This is the problem with modern westernised love/dating marriages.