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A Query From Us Singhnees


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To the person who at the beginning of this thread who said make friends an get to know some singhs...like I said firstly that is a step towards the bf/gf situation..which I dont want to get in to and plus most of these 'just' friend making attempts have ended up also quite hurtful.

I used to go gatka here in Southall with my bro and cousin bro's. What I found there was even more strange. Most singhs amritdhari....some supposedly looking chardiklaa in their apporoach to gatka learning and practise.......

I'd smile and maybe look their way to make conversatiuon and they'd turn their backs, loook past me or just give me a strange look like I was just some outsider...basically just not 'cool'........ Anyway........I was getting quite good and had learnt all the different pedra steps and was going on to do the salaami....

For some reason they never (the singh teachers...young guys) let me progress and kept me doing the pedra even when I had perfected it. They spent more time amongst themsleves chatting and doing others saashtar practises.

i rEALLY Really wanted to learn and be just as good as them....and am a sport loving person since always. But their atitude made me give up my gatka training....

which is quite sad and has left me feeling like>>>Singhs!?! made me drop out of gatka..the Sikh Martial arts...and me being a Singhnee...it was heartbreaking not to be able to learn what Guru Gobind Singh Ji had wanted us all to learn and enjoy ( :wub: ). Ive decided to try and start classes for bibiyan some day...are there any at the moment?? (someone PM me if there are pleaseeee).

So these are some more things that singhnees like me are dealing with. My cousin sisters also started gatka one or two yrs back and dropped out because of this same reason. So we have singhs not helping in any way at all to let their sisters

Keep their rehit....

Be happy in their rehit....

and... Progress.....Vaheguru!?!

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Telling from the non response I guess singhs don't mind what Ive expressed in my last post and no one? cares that bibyan are being held back...Guess itz okay then...Im the only one.

How to get out of not caring?

It is better to learn something earlier than later, then you have seen the pitfalls and can avoid them in the future. Even if the pitfalls become a part of your need.

Chalo.

Thanks Vaheguru Jee.....You have your ways of teaching us and I have complete faith that what Guru ji You have planned for me will be all good.

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my dearest sister .of course lots of us are pained by what u wrote about your gatka experience .too many things in sikhi are male dominated from the sewa in darbar sahib ,to amrit sancha, to leadership and to gatka.this is very very unfair,abhorent,ugly,anti-sikhi,irrelevant,abusive,painful,hurtful,unnecessary,and constricting.its a weakness which serves no purpose,deters healthy growth and is a put off .sikhi is a mutual and democratic experience of the grace of Guru upon all,and should never be in the tight grip of one race,tribe,clan or sex .some people out there need to back off,humble down or wake up!

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To the person who at the beginning of this thread who said make friends an get to know some singhs...like I said firstly that is a step towards the bf/gf situation..which I dont want to get in to and plus most of these 'just' friend making  attempts have ended up also quite hurtful.

I used to go gatka here in Southall with my bro and cousin bro's. What I found there was even more strange. Most singhs amritdhari....some supposedly looking chardiklaa in their apporoach to gatka learning and practise.......

I'd smile and maybe look their way to make conversatiuon and they'd turn their backs, loook past me or just give me a strange look like I was just some outsider...basically just not 'cool'........ Anyway........I was getting quite good and had learnt all the different pedra steps and was going on to do the salaami....

For some reason they never (the singh teachers...young guys) let me progress and kept me doing the pedra even when I had perfected it. They spent more time amongst themsleves chatting and doing others saashtar practises.

i rEALLY Really wanted to learn and be just as good as them....and am a sport loving person since always. But their atitude made me give up my gatka training....

which is quite sad and has left me feeling like>>>Singhs!?! made me drop out of gatka..the Sikh Martial arts...and me being a Singhnee...it was heartbreaking not to be able to learn what Guru Gobind Singh Ji had wanted us all to learn and enjoy ( :wub: ). Ive decided to try and start classes for bibiyan some day...are there any at the moment?? (someone PM me if there are pleaseeee).

So these are some more things that singhnees like me are dealing with. My cousin sisters also started gatka one or two yrs back and dropped out because of this same reason. So we have singhs not helping in any way at all to let their sisters

Keep their rehit....

Be happy in their rehit....

and... Progress.....Vaheguru!?!

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sis ,

i think you and your cusins should go and express your veiws to the teacher, if thats not appropriate at least to someone who has authority at the gatka lessons. Last think you wana do is drop out, we should not give up, you have a right, if your cusins are willing to help stick up with you then thats better. Is there no alternative classes held by different people?

We had a bad experience with a gatka group from down that end a while back, we asked them to do an event, and then we had cancelled it a few days before becos we werent goin to have a big sangat, but some ppl turned up on the night after the sikhi event had finished, they were totally high on drugs and forced the sevadars and bibi to pay them nearly over a hundred quid and would not leave otherwise.

These ppl are not the Singhs of Guru Gobind Singh, they use sikhi to hide their dirty ways and they shud hav no place in the panth.

anyway sorry to hear whats happened , punjabi culture comes into these things and women are seen as lower class citizens, only the youth , next generation can fix that, the older people will never change

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proud to be singhnee ji i am shocked to know that you quit gatka cuz of other singhs! bhainji i hope u are able to restart your training with gatka with a better experience this time around. i think you are in london area but maybe you have heard of a gatka academy in teh midlands called Khalsa Panth Akharra....the head teacher is Bhai Boota Singh (my jija ji :@ ) and they have many girls in the academy as well. i think they have a branch in the london area as well, not sure though...check the link in my signature :wub:

sorry went off topic there abit....

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ੴ ਜੇ ਇਸ ਮੁਰਖ ਕੋਲ ਗਲ ਕਰਨੀ ਨਹੀ ਅਈ ਤਾ ਜਰੁਰ ਮਾਫ ਕਰ ਦੇਣਾ। ਅਪਨੀ ਗੱਮੀ ਵਿਚ ਮਨੁਖ ਕਈ ਵਾਰ ਯਾਦਾ ਬਲ ਜਾਦਾ।

Truly sorry to be so down lately.

Amandeep Kaur Khalsa

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dont have to feel sorry, because there is and always must be nothing more real than the relationship between all of us khalsa children of the Guru.and relationships are about being able to be yourself ,as u are,without being judged.we are here to listen to each other,share each others pains and sufferings ,and inspire each other .we all have our periods when things get at us ,so dont feel bad about being down.I have had the oppurtunity to meet and be close to some of the most chardikela sikhs you could imagine ,and trust me ,they all go through this kind of stuff.

lets pray at Guruji's charan kamal to always bless us,amongst other things with amrit,naam ras and chardikela and amritvela .cos we are children of the sword and of victory.

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If you feel that you are being putting down no matter what other gender is... FIGHT till end. Don't give up ! Don't shy away.. don't QUIT Phaenjee.. Though you already left.. but advice from this veerjee is that in future KEEP STRONG and FIGHT for it no matter what situation it is... Never give up !

Once me and mysinghnee was in some cafe in india and there was bunch of young group of college/univ students right next to our table.. There wz one young lady who was watching my wife's daastar and nodded headed left and right (like TSK TSK) and chatting about it with others.. I noticed it and didn't like it.. and when we were leaving she did it again and they were 15+ group.. I went to them and just said.. "What the $%# your problem is?".. they all kept silence and like oh no no nothing... I regret that i have to do that but it was very wrong of them to look down on someone else like we are inferior or something.. I could have ignored and went outside but then they would do that same to other person.. So taking some negative step is sometime important to teach other that they are wrong. Small off-topic example but might gives you a different view on how to handle the situation.

You are STRONG WILL PERSON.. So ALWAYS STAY IN CHARDI KALA.. Forget about others.. Just do what makes you feel Happy ! Always stay in High Spirits !

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Once me and mysinghnee was in some cafe in india and there was bunch of young group of college/univ students right next to our table.. There wz one young lady who was watching my wife's daastar and nodded headed left and right (like TSK TSK) and chatting about it with others.. I noticed it and didn't like it.. and when we were leaving she did it again and they were 15+ group.. I went to them and just said.. "What the $%# your problem is?".. they all kept silence and like oh no no nothing... I regret that i have to do that but it was very wrong of them to look down on someone else like we are inferior or something.. I could have ignored and went outside but then they would do that same to other person.. So taking some negative step is sometime important to teach other that they are wrong. Small off-topic example but might gives you a different view on how to handle the situation.
haha...i remember u told me this story when we met...even while narrating it u went into bir ras...i can imagine how u must have been for real :nihungsmile: .
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