Made A Very Bad Mistake And Truly Want To Make Things Right Again - Please Help Sikhsangat

[Guest Guest]

First of all i want 2 say i'm sorry if by asking for advice on this topic i have offended anyone. I am really misguided and shamed right now and need help on what to do. please dnt abandon me as i feel i have made a very big mistake.

I recently started university and got to meet a lot of new and different people. I have uncut hair and beard all my life and all my life i have followed sikhi to my understanding, going gurdwara and helping out, not drinking alcohol and eating meat. I used to do my paath each day. I have not taken amrit purely because i thought i was too young and that i didnt want to take amrit and then do something wrong. But in the last 1 to 1 and a 1/2 years i have drifted away from sikhi. I stopped doing my paath and being really lazy. I always thought i would get back to my old ways someday but that day kept getting further and further. Starting university gave me so much freedom and i kept to some of my principles - not drinking or smoking or eating meat. I met so many nice people and at first really enjoyed myself. but i started going out a lot and the vice that caused me so much difficulty in controlling - lustful desires - got stronger and stronger. I wanted to have a gf, and forgot that thay are our sisters. I got into the chakkar of attraction to some girls but nothing happened because i'm probly too ugly and i stopped myself as i told myself it was wrong. But the last couple of months i have let kaam get the better of me and i HATE myself for it.

i got into the chakkar of fancying girls and got rejected by a girl that i liked. I didnt take it very well , although i kept my feelings inside i didnt like myself. Part of me wanted to change and part of me was angry at her and me for creating all this hurt inside me. I know this is no excuse for what i have done. A couple of weeks back things werent going good and i felt separated from people, my friends. Family life was not going very well and i felt alone. As this feeling that i was causing all these problems, and the way i was wasnt good enough built up, so did all this lustful thinking and sexual desires. I let the kaam get the better of me and got caught up in sexual desires that one day when i felt really bad i gave into lust and visited an adult massage place, basically a prostitute place. I cant believe i actually thought it would make me feel better about myself. As soon as it had happened i felt so much guilt and felt so bad about what i had done. I though of how pathetic i had been and everything, from my morals that i had and my values all came back slapping me in the face. I so badly regret what i have done but then the worse feeling is knowing that i made the decision to go and do it. I have even considered ending my life as i do not deserve it. I am so ashamed and once again i am sorry for giving sikhs a bad name.

Now i ask for anybody's help as i want to make things right. I never want to stray away from sikhi again but i worry if i dnt deserve to anymore. what do i do now. I know i wont be able to get rid of this regret but i truly want to be forgiven and become a stronger sikh. I've always wanted to take amrit and was planning on in the future, but i do not even know if i can do that anymore. If you are reading this and and are angry towards me i cant blame you but i can tell you that no-one hates me more than myself right now.

Thank you for listening

[Gupt Lion]

bhai sahib firstly do ardas to mahraj you should not be asking us forgiveness but ask it from mahraj .

tjust try japping as much naam as possible try waking up at amritvela and get into good sangat i'm sure there are prob a good sikh society at your uni?

[raju123]

dear bro,

your growing up,

you have made a mistake in going to that place ?

some say yes/some so no, as u grow up u will get to know whats right and what is wrong.

we all make mistakes, that is how we learn.

ask god for guidance and he will answer. :TH:

[Akaali]

The best thing to do is how you have expressed yourself in front of the sangat, express yourself with 100% pure sincerety in front of Guru Granth Sahib jee, and get a hukamnama taken I guess from a granthi singh, and understand what Gurujee says, also talk to your local punj pyare, ones that speak/understand english and understand these issues thoroughly, become a true Sikh, no-one has crossed over this ocean with having two legs in two different boats, take amrit and become the son of guru gobind singh jee. You will only be able to control the vices with the grace of gurujee, and with the fear of god in your MIND.

Don't worry, we all make mistakes in life, we fall and rise throughout life no-one falls and stays down, as long as they have strength they will continue to get up and walk the path of truth, and Gurujee will bless you with this strength. So don't delay before its too late, take gurujee's sharan, and taste the nectar of IMMORTALITY!!!!

[sikhlionz]

The best thing to do is how you have expressed yourself in front of the sangat, express yourself with 100% pure sincerety in front of Guru Granth Sahib jee, and get a hukamnama taken I guess from a granthi singh, and understand what Gurujee says, also talk to your local punj pyare, ones that speak/understand english and understand these issues thoroughly, become a true Sikh, no-one has crossed over this ocean with having two legs in two different boats, take amrit and become the son of guru gobind singh jee. You will only be able to control the vices with the grace of gurujee, and with the fear of god in your MIND.

Don't worry, we all make mistakes in life, we fall and rise throughout life no-one falls and stays down, as long as they have strength they will continue to get up and walk the path of truth, and Gurujee will bless you with this strength. So don't delay before its too late, take gurujee's sharan, and taste the nectar of IMMORTALITY!!!!

we all make mistakes, whats important is that in those times we sincerely turn to the sanctuary of Guru Maharaj.

This Shabad is by Guru Raam Daas Ji in Raag Maaroo on Ang 995

mwrU mhlw 4 Gru 2

maaroo mehalaa 4 ghar 2

Maaroo, Fourth Mehla, Second House:

<> siqgur pRswid ]

ik oa(n)kaar sathigur prasaadh ||

One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:

jipE nwmu suk jnk gur bcnI hir hir srix pry ]

japiou naam suk janak gur bachanee har har saran parae ||

Suk-deva and Janak meditated on the Naam; following the Guru's Teachings, they sought the Sanctuary of the Lord, Har, Har.

dwldu BMij sudwmy imilE BgqI Bwie qry ]

dhaaladh bha(n)j sudhaamae miliou bhagathee bhaae tharae ||

God met Sudama and removed his poverty; through loving devotional worship, he crossed over.

Bgiq vClu hir nwmu ik®qwrQu gurmuiK ik®pw kry ]1]

bhagath vashhal har naam kirathaarathh guramukh kirapaa karae ||1||

God is the Lover of His devotees; the Lord's Name is fufilling; God showers His Mercy on the Gurmukhs. ||1||

myry mn nwmu jpq auDry ]

maerae man naam japath oudhharae ||

O my mind, chanting the Naam, the Name of the Lord, you will be saved.

DR¨ pRihlwdu ibdru dwsI suqu gurmuiK nwim qry ]1] rhwau ]

dhhroo prehilaadh bidhar dhaasee suth guramukh naam tharae ||1|| rehaao ||

Dhroo, Prahlaad and Bidar the slave-girl's son, became Gurmukh, and through the Naam, crossed over. ||1||Pause||

kljuig nwmu pRDwnu pdwrQu Bgq jnw auDry ]

kalajug naam pradhhaan padhaarathh bhagath janaa oudhharae ||

In this Dark Age of Kali Yuga, the Naam is the supreme wealth; it saves the humble devotees.

nwmw jYdyau kbIru iqRlocnu siB doK gey cmry ]

naamaa jaidhaeo kabeer thrilochan sabh dhokh geae chamarae ||

All the faults of Naam Dayv, Jai Dayv, Kabeer, Trilochan and Ravi Daas the leather-worker were covered.

gurmuiK nwim lgy sy auDry siB iklibK pwp try ]2]

guramukh naam lagae sae oudhharae sabh kilabikh paap ttarae ||2||

Those who become Gurmukh, and remain attached to the Naam, are saved; all their sins are washed off. ||2||

jo jo nwmu jpY AprwDI siB iqn ky doK prhry ]

jo jo naam japai aparaadhhee sabh thin kae dhokh pareharae ||

Whoever chants the Naam, all his sins and mistakes are taken away.

bysuAw rvq Ajwmlu auDirE muiK bolY nwrwiexu nrhry ]

baesuaa ravath ajaamal oudhhariou mukh bolai naaraaein nareharae ||

Ajaamal, who had sex with prostitites, was saved, by chanting the Name of the Lord.

nwmu jpq augRsYix giq pweI qoiV bMDn mukiq kry ]3]

naam japath ougrasain gath paaee thorr ba(n)dhhan mukath karae ||3||

Chanting the Naam, Ugar Sain obtained salvation; his bonds were broken, and he was liberated. ||3||

jn kau Awip AnugRhu kIAw hir AMgIkwru kry ]

jan ko aap anugrahu keeaa har a(n)geekaar karae ||

God Himself takes pity on His humble servants, and makes them His own.

syvk pYj rKY myrw goivdu srix pry auDry ]

saevak paij rakhai maeraa govidh saran parae oudhharae ||

My Lord of the Universe saves the honor of His servants; those who seek His Sanctuary are saved.

jn nwnk hir ikrpw DwrI aur DirE nwmu hry ]4]1]

jan naanak har kirapaa dhhaaree our dhhariou naam harae ||4||1||

The Lord has showered servant Nanak with His Mercy; he has enshrined the Lord's Name within his heart. ||4||1||

[Guest Guest]

veerji tht shabad in the above post proves tht no matter how many sins u have committed u will be saved if u meditate on waheguruz name...so veerji plz jaap naam, do path and do ardass askin fo forgivness and amrit di daat...do it with pure luv and faith

we dont really know how much paap we have done in our previous lives so no one is actually is all pure here on this earth....janam janam ki is manh ko mal lagi...kala hoa shah...so dont be soo hard on urself...ur not the only one who done somethin rong...we r humanz veerji...we make mistakes....and we learn frm them...bhulan andar sab ko...abhul guru kartar - everyone makes mistakes only guru ji and the creater are infallible

alwayz do ardas veerji...keep faith...do path...as much as u can...do sukhmani sahib if u can and read the translation if u cant understand the gurmukhi properly...waheguru ji is forgivin veer jio...dont not worry...whoever takes his sharan will be saved...so plz ask guru ji for amrit...and yeah keep gud sangat...get rid of all the bad sangat...if u dont know neone whoz on sikhi path then therez alwayz sangat online...ur alwayz welcome on this site veer jio...take one step towards guru ji and he will take thousands towards u...u chant his name with luv once and he will chant ur name thousand times and save u frm this hell

hope this was any help...bhul chuk maff karni veer jio...im a sinner aswell...but waheguru ji did his kirpa and blessed me with his amrit so if he can forgive me...why wouldnt he forgive u veer ji....jus do ardass and have faith

stay in chardi kala veer jio

waheguru ji ka khalsa

waheguru ji ki fateh

[curious_man]

"and yeah keep gud sangat...get rid of all the bad sangat...if u dont know neone whoz on sikhi path then therez alwayz sangat online...ur alwayz welcome on this site veer jio...take one step towards guru ji and he will take thousands towards u."

tru said!! :TH:

and yeah...now since u have hopefully realized it...start again on the path of sikhi...

start keeping kesh and pagh... and me sure..most of the "kool" girls..wont come to u for a "kool" chat!!

[chandanjit kaur]

WJKK WJKF

omg!!! i had typed out a real long and nice reply for this thread and out of nowhere my computer shut down!!! oh well i'll try saying whatever i said before man....well veerji....waheguru....we all make mistakes ji....you say that you're growing farther apart from sikhi? veerji....it happens...i'm there too ji.....and just think.....this is all happening because of guru ji....it's all happening under his hukham veerji.....now there's no use of thinking about what happened in the past and then regreting it.....you have a future and you want that rite,hana? so firstly do an ardas to guru sahib with a pure heart and beg HIM for forgiveness....and then slowly start your rehat again....tell yourself i have to do paath....i have to....and if you have full faith in our guru sahib....you surely will get your wonderful rehat back veerji....we're all learning still....and veerji we all learn from our mistakes rite? if we never made mistakes how could we learn? you have realized your mistake so now learn from it....you said that you felt lonely? waheguru......veerji....when no one else is around you....and you feel that no one is there for you and you're left alone now.....guru sahib is always there for you.....no matter what if you just think of HIM once HE'll come running to you....HE's always around us....HE will never let you feel lonely....waheguru.....just do simran and trust me veerji you'll get maha anand from it...way better then a prostitute place....don't feel guilty about this veerji....it all happened because of guru sahib.....and don't end your life veerji.....it's one of the most precious gifts from guru ji.....sure we all make mistakes but like end our life???never....it's an even bigger paap ji.......jaap naam veerji.....dw it'll work out....just never forget guru sahib....HE's always there no matter what.....waheguru....bhul chuk muaf karnee sangat jio...

WJKK WJKF

[Bad Girl]

Waheguru forgives those who regret at their mistakes.

[SINGH20]

No human is perfect. Regretting is good to achieve consciousness. But dont be hard for your self, try to stay calm and dont make the mistakes again! I am also in same situation as yours! Focus brother!