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Matrimony Preference Of Amritdhari Sikhs


Guest _Supersingh1984_
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Guest _Supersingh1984_

I found this on another website:

"waheguru ji ka khalsa

waheguru ji ki fateh

Since last few months, I am in very peculiar conflicts in my mind, bt i was not having somone to share it, but now i think sikhnet Team can do much so now these are in front of you with hope that you will help me regarding this.

Being a representative of all those girls who want to follow the path of Guru Gobind Singh Ji, I am writing this note to ask the society that why their duality is making the Amritdhari or Non-trimmers' life miserable.

If We (Amritdhari) galz want to marry with a Gursikh, Gurmukh boy what wrong in it?

But no.... we are scolded by our parents, relatives, even by the thekedars of our religion. Reason is because their parents have to face lot of troubles to find such match for their daughter who could accept her with all her Rehats.

In fact, Amritdhari boyz prefer galz who are trimmers. Is it not double hurt for us? On one side, we are facing society who is not accepting this practise, On other side our panthaks even not accepting us as their wives. Why?... Becoz of hunger of beauty only?......Becoz they want an attractive item walking by their side? They themselves dont get their beards trimmed, then why they want their wives to be trimmer? Are women the things of Show-Off only? Are they like the piece of decoration which should be attractive otherwise their status will be lost?

When we are rejected by boys' side at time of meetings before marriage, Of-course we hear rubbish talks like Why did you take Amrit before marriage? "Hun kithon labhogiyan apne waaste munde, Kisi Bhai ji naal hi Vyaah kar lo, If you will not get trimmed ur husband will not love you, he will definitely go outside", and many a lot.

I have scene many cases who have to break off their engagement even becoz of the demand of trimming by Boyz. Worst of this is... one of them was Amritdhari Boy.

Oh Please Dont do like this with us.

If these situations occur frequently, Pious thing AMRIT will restraint to males only. When our Great Gurus did not discriminate us on Sex, caste, creed then who the hell are they?

I know that perhaps my topic of discussion is not as per interest of every one at sikhnet but still with the hope I m sharing this with you. You have read many cases, problems, articles on dowry, but this problem is also a blot on our religion where our own Panthaks are not helping us. On one hand they influence people to be Amritdhari, Dastar Sajao, Beard na katao, Wadh ton Wadh Amrit Chhako, Singh Sajo" Te on other hand their sons means sons of our religion are like this. isnt it a kind of harrasment to Amritdhari girls?

This is a question from us to all young sikh boys and persons who are a part of our society?

Please do forward this mail to many of young sikh boyz so that our humble voice could reach to maximum and they people should realize that it is also an aspect of our religion which we are ignoring.

I request all sikhnet members to help me to forwrd this message to beyond limits of states, age, nation. sikhnet team de Aagu members nu meri request hai ki please mainu dasso that how can this message spread to society plz je tuhanu lagda hai ki eh problem non relevant hai tab bhi reply zarur karo gi.

Seeking for the kind view from your side

gitika kaur khalsa

sggsji daughter nd a kookar of guruji's darbar"

let me tell you there are many guys out there who want a marry a women who follows rehat properly, including me, so to all the sikh women out there please please please dont get depressed........you will find your Singh Charming.

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Waheguroo jee ka Khalsa!

Waheguroo jee kee Fateh!

Well, the person who wrote that IS wrong in a way, no amritdhari wants a wife who doesn't follow the same path he does. But she is right in a way I've seen first hand. The families of a lot of girls put a lot of pressure on their daughters to not take amrit, to cut their hair, to make them an easy sell for someone else. They have little value for sikhi, and even those who do start breaking other rules like considering caste, creed, the guy's "pind" and other such things which go against the word and meaning of sikhi.

Waheguroo jee ka Khalsa!

Waheguroo jee kee Fateh!

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I found this on another website:

let me tell you there are many guys out there who want a marry a women who follows rehat properly, including me, so to all the sikh women out there please please please dont get depressed........you will find your Singh Charming.

lol

nice post by the way.

im not sure if thats the case here( maybe few do who really dont know about the value and power of bani/gursikhi jeevan)...but mostly girls from india are scolded by families. i know one aunty ji(she is about 5 yrs older thn me so i call her Didiii ji as well as aunty ji whtevr comes to my mind)

but she was amritdhari before and thn when it was time forher to get married ...her family kinda told her to stop cuz she was marrying my uncle ji (my uncle isn't amritdhari...he is monaa) so she had to.

no one knew about it until i met her nd got to know her. she told her hubby(my uncle) that she was amritshak after yr of their marrge :sady:

he goes "menu pallaan dasddii ma keyra tere naal viaah ni si karroona"

she is reallly sweet and soft spoken so she said " i didnt know ..lot of guys dont...so my parents told me to 'break' it if i want to get married"

my mom nevr said anything but i have heard it from many aunty jis saying that to me.

'beyta amrit baddh vich shak lannaa si (after marriage). hun mundaa labnaa ukhaa ho janaa" addin some stuff that they say would also make it evn hardr to find a hubby.

like im sure im gonna live till i get married? :) (our real hubby is waheguru init?)

why dont we see that evry second of our life has value.

why are girls pressured that way? even guys now these days?(will take amrit after i get married etc)

is it because girls, if they dont get married(even boys), that they are some sort of "bhoojh" on the parents?

im confused!

bhul chuk muaf karni

waheguru ji kakhalsa waheguru ji k fateh!

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WJKK WJKF

Its actually part or marayda that both partners should be amritdari before they get married...

Man marriage IS really messed up business now, especially for the new sikh youth, but i would have thought that the amritdari boys would have prefered amritdari girls- cos then theres no controversy... waheguruuuu

bhul chuk maaf

WJKK WJKF

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Guest _Supersingh1984_

why are alot of Amritdhari men and women suffering like this because of other sikhs who dont follow sikhism, why Amritdhari men and women made to feel inferior beacuse of a simple thing like hair, the way i see it if a women keeps her hair she will probably feel incredibley happy marrying a man who keeps his hair. My non sikh friends dont look down on me for keeping my hair and beard, why do non Amritdhari sikhs feel the need to put us down.....answer i reckon is that they them selves probably have low self esteem and try to put us down to make themselves feel better.

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well actually ive seen loads of amritdhari boys from my place preferring to marry non-amritdhari gals.. so i dun think the the first post was entirely wrong,, it makes me think stimes .. if this amritdhari boys cant accept the amritdhari gals .. then who will?? in the end of the day i know its all sanjog and karam and etc etc etc .. but it reali sad to see all this happening..

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