I Live Yet Do Not Live In Me

[Jasy]

I Live yet do not Live in Me

I live yet do not live in me,

am waiting as my life goes by,

and die because I do not die.

No longer do I live in me,

and without God I cannot live;

to him or me I cannot give

my self, so what can living be?

A thousand deaths my agony

waiting as my life goes by,

dying because I do not die.

This life I live alone I view

as robbery of life, and so

it is a constant death -- with no

way out until I live with you.

God, hear me, what I say is true:

I do not want this life of mine,

and die because I do not die.

Being so removed from you I say

what kind of life can I have here

but death so ugly and severe

and worse than any form of pain?

I pity me -- and yet my fate

is that I must keep up this lie,

and die because I do not die.

The fish taken out of the sea

is not without a consolation:

his dying is of brief duration

and ultimately brings relief.

Yet what convulsive death can be

as bad as my pathetic life?

The more I live the more I die.

When I begin to feel relief

on seeing you in the sacrament,

I sink in deeper discontent,

deprived of your sweet company.

Now everything compels my grief:

I want -- yet can't -- see you nearby,

and die because I do not die.

Although I find my pleasure, Waheguru,

in hope of someday seeing you,

I see that I can lose you too,

which makes my pain doubly severe,

and so I live in darkest fear,

and hope, wait as life goes by,

dying because I do not die.

Deliver me from death, my Father God,

and give me life; now you have wound

a rope about me; harshly bound

I ask you to release the cord.

See how I die to see you, Lord,

and I am shattered where I lie,

dying because I do not die.

My death will trigger tears in me,

and I shall mourn my life: a day

annihilated by the way

I fail and sin relentlessly.

O Waheguru, when will it be

that I can say without a lie:

I live because I do not die?

Bhul Chukh Maaf

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh