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[Mehtab Singh]

I am going to be blunt, so in advance, apologies...

You know what they call someone (male or female) who has 2 people at a time? A two-timer! I can understand your concern as you like her and want to be supportive towards her. But let me share a personal experience with you. I always thought it was a great "humanitarian" deed to be someone's "crying shoulder". Guess what, you won't find one when you need it, and I can see you don't have one (except Gurujee). I told myself that I have never let any friend of mine cry alone, as I would always be there for them. You know what, when I cried (sometimes literally), I cried alone, all by myself. I never had anyone to just sit beside me. Thats when I realized this: http://www.sikhitothemax.com/Page.asp?Sour...p;ShabadID=2062 . I am not going to ask you to read more Bani or do Ardas because you are smart enough to know (and do) that. Just tell me one thing, what will you lose if you don't end up with her? Ki ho jana? So why cry buckets over someone who you know can't be with you? She can't let go of the dude she is going to marry, so why are you wasting your time? Tomorrow they will get married, what will you do then? Sing a sad song from some Bollywood movie at their wedding reception? Is that the life you want to live?

Now for some Punjabi tadka to this...

Ki rawla paaya hoya aa? Jad pata aa nahi kuj ho sakda fer ron-pittan naal gal banju? Kal nu ohne viah karke passey nu ho jana te tu roi jana. Ajj oh aap rondi aa esli tera modda farreya aa. Kal nu baba boyfriend singh naal gal baat murrkay shuru hogi fer tera mooh vi ni dekhna. Apa eho jehe case bathere dekhe aa. Asi te chalo bach gaye, par ulloo banan vaaleya di ghaat ni koi. Duniya hassdi aa ohna te ki vekho kurri magar ronda pittda renda si, oh chali gayee dujje naal eh hajay vi sog manaaee janda. Te mai ni chaunda tere te duniya hassey. Kyon ki tere te hassugi te mere Guru de saroop te vi hassugi jo metto bardaasht ni hona. Shadd parey yaar dafa kar. Koi siddi saadi Singhnee (je hajay haigiyaan ) labbkey viah kar lai tu vi. Hor na howe kurri nu kal nu maukka milay apniya saheliyaan nu kehen da "haiii pata falanna Singh mere te marda...mera te viah ho gaya te oh vichara hajay vi gaanay gaayee janda".

Bas bahut bol leya...janta ne kehna Mehtab tadi kuwara baithha hajay tak . Je gal samjh ni aundi te kisay vellay nu kawi translate kar dewe. Sadde ton 2 vaari jhidkaan ni maariya jandiya. Akalmand nu ishara kaafi aa.

[JoDi]

duuuude it sounds like u need some sangat,

i agree with the above

u need to distance yourself from her, give her and yourself some space to think

i know it may be hard at first because it has become a routine to talk to her

but you should cononcentrate on school, sangat, bani and most importantly Guru Sahib

the fact that she's with someone else and telling you that you're perfect for her makes things shady

you deserve much more, someone u can grow with and help your sikhi, not bring it down

right now it doesnt sounds like its worth it

too much unnecessary drama

ask her what she wants

if she doesnt know now, she'll never know

[Guest Dee]

I know exactly how you feel. My relationship ended 3 months ago. Ever since I listen to gurbani daily do Ardas. But all can think about is my ex everey minute of every day. Sometimes I think I'm going to be like this forever. I pray for him to love me again and my heart should be focused on Waheguru but its so difficult. You really need to break off contact, its sooooooooo hard at first but it gets easier. I wish there was a quick way of getting over it, but there isn't just! keep praying and doing simran good luck

[sherlsurj]

its stupid. u cud go ur whole life chasing girls like this and teh only guarantee is u'll be hurt. look man a girl cud keep u going for ages saying stuff like this but dnt be go gullable and take it. if it was gonna happen it wud but why wud u want to get involved with 1stly an amrithari girl who is using 2 men and 2ndly ur amrithari. luk concentrate on sikhi ur life dont go wasting ur time on sum1 elses words. i know ive been there i fell in love with a girl and she too kept me going on words. words .'liek i love u but im not redi, lets just wait......or its complicated'. she didnt hesitate in using me when no1 else was there thgh!i belived her every word and after a year she said she didnt love me anymore!after all of that. ur being used man sorry 4 the hard words but i dont like it when sum1 takes 4 granted sum1s heart/emotions

[Mehtab Singh]

i love u but im not redi, lets just wait

Gurujee loves us more than anyone else. You call people "meri jaan" whom you love like your own life. But guess what, Gurujee said Khalsa meri jaan ki jaan, He loves us more than His own life. And He doesn't ask you to wait. The moment you surrender, He accepts you. Baba Nand Singh Ji also said that we are the ones who delay, Gurujee doesn't delay even for a blink to bless and forgive us. So take this as a motivation and let Gurujee be in charge of your life, not some girl who is (sorry to say) herself confused about her life.

[Guest kaur!!]

veer ji.. these kind of things is very common nowadays with amritdhari singhs and bhenjis falling in love. What you got to realise is you have given ur head to ur guru. So everything u should be doing should be according to what maharaj says. Try and eradicate kaam krodh lobh moh hankaar. I understand when u take amrit there are more obstacles in life but u've gt to realise these are from ur guru.. testing the faith u have for him. to see if your love for him is real. to see if you can overcome these obstacles and try and reach ur ultimate destination

the first thing that came into my mind when i read this post was

saachee preeth ham thum sio joree ||

I am joined in true love with You, Lord.

thum sio jor avar sa(n)g thoree ||3||

I am joined with You, and I have broken with all others. ||3||

What i advise u is dont waste this so called love on just anyone. Join your love to guru ji. Guru ji is what counts in life. you got to realise this world is just a mere illusion. Nothings going to last forever. So love ur guru and dont get caught up in this bakwaas..,

sorry if i've offended anyone!!

[Laadli Fauj]

jYqsrI mÚ 4 ]

jaithasaree ma 4 ||

Jaitsree, Fourth Mehla:

hm bwirk kCUA n jwnh giq imiq qyry mUrK mugD ieAwnw ]

ham baarik kashhooa n jaaneh gath mith thaerae moorakh mugadhh eiaanaa ||

I am Your child; I know nothing about Your state and extent; I am foolish, idiotic and ignorant.

hir ikrpw Dwir dIjY miq aUqm kir lIjY mugDu isAwnw ]1]

har kirapaa dhhaar dheejai math ootham kar leejai mugadhh siaanaa ||1||

O Lord, shower me with Your Mercy; bless me with an enlightened intellect; I am foolish - make me clever. ||1||

myrw mnu AwlsIAw auGlwnw ]

maeraa man aalaseeaa oughalaanaa ||

My mind is lazy and sleepy.

hir hir Awin imlwieE guru swDU imil swDU kpt Kulwnw ] rhwau ]

har har aan milaaeiou gur saadhhoo mil saadhhoo kapatt khulaanaa || rehaao ||

The Lord, Har, Har, has led me to meet the Holy Guru; meeting the Holy, the shutters have been opened wide. ||Pause||

gur iKnu iKnu pRIiq lgwvhu myrY hIArY myry pRIqm nwmu prwnw ]

gur khin khin preeth lagaavahu maerai heearai maerae preetham naam paraanaa ||

O Guru, each and every instant, fill my heart with love; the Name of my Beloved is my breath of life.

ibnu nwvY mir jweIAY myry Twkur ijau AmlI Amil luBwnw ]2]

bin naavai mar jaaeeai maerae t(h)aakur jio amalee amal lubhaanaa ||2||

Without the Name, I would die; the Name of my Lord and Master is to me like the drug to the addict. ||2||

ijn min pRIiq lgI hir kyrI iqn Duir Bwg purwnw ]

jin man preeth lagee har kaeree thin dhhur bhaag puraanaa ||

Those who enshrine love for the Lord within their minds fulfill their pre-ordained destiny.

iqn hm crx sryvh iKnu iKnu ijn hir mIT lgwnw ]3]

thin ham charan saraeveh khin khin jin har meet(h) lagaanaa ||3||

I worship their feet, each and every instant; the Lord seems very sweet to them. ||3||

hir hir ik®pw DwrI myrY Twkuir jnu ibCuirAw icrI imlwnw ]

har har kirapaa dhhaaree maerai t(h)aakur jan bishhuriaa chiree milaanaa ||

My Lord and Master, Har, Har, has showered His Mercy upon His humble servant; separated for so long, he is now re-united with the Lord.

Dnu Dnu siqguru ijin nwmu idRVwieAw jnu nwnku iqsu kurbwnw ]4]3]

dhhan dhhan sathigur jin naam dhrirraaeiaa jan naanak this kurabaanaa ||4||3||

Blessed, blessed is the True Guru, who has implanted the Naam, the Name of the Lord within me; servant Nanak is a sacrifice to Him. ||4||3||

[kaur_khalistani_lioness]

Singhsta wjkkwjkf!

how r u at the moment after all the good advice from sangat? what is going on in the mind?

[Singhsta]

Thanks everyone for the help

Well I've just been trying to concentrate on Guru Jee more as of now. I still feel the same way about her, but just trying to get over it, and I am still talking to her, still trying to be supportive. Don't really think i can just cut her out of my life, but I'm trying to be a good friend while controling my thoughts and feelings. I want sangat to know i didnt choose to have these feelings and i do feel ashamed because i am in guru sahibs roop and i have these feelings, I just hope I will be forgiven.

Thank you all and if anyone has any more advice, it would be greatly appreciated.

WJKK WJKF

[Guest _B4ND4_]

If you really wanna help yourself paste the link of this thread in the msn window next time you talk to her. Now the question is do you have the guts to do that???

Aren't you the one who is enjoying this "game of love". Maybe you are just using this 'being supportive' as an excuse.

And all those who are blaming the bibi, do you guys know the girl?? You see someone coming here and saying he is amritdhari and trust evrything he says?? Not having a go at "Singhsta"..just making a point.

If she loves you she'll come to you, stop doing this "msn" ashiqui .. get out and get real .. har koi ni mirza bann sakda .. Ishq ta har koi kar lennda.. nibah koi virla virla hi sakda...