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Fiance Cheated Need Support/advice


Manchester_Sikhi
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To cut a long story short, I found out my fiance cheated on me.

We were both very much into Sikhi and she is from a good Gursikh family.

We were NOT physical in anyway and had a proper 'punjabi' engagement.

Shes cheated on me and now I'm devastetd.

How does one derive support from situation like this?

I feel lost, but i do not feel like giving up my saroop, however I feel I've dropped 10 rungs on the ladder and need to climb up again.

Naam Simran is fine and I'm happy to try and do that, but I just thought I'd post my sad sob story and just warn all those who think they are in a good loving and happy engagement/marrage to just be careful you don't put all your emotion into it and less in your true parter (Maharaji). KalYug is so very real and it's amazing how the people you look up to as good and wise 'Gursikhs' can actually be so very much different to your expectation.

The hard part is picking up the pieces and moving on, espicially when all my crys to Maharaji are left unheard.

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I am sorry this happened. However, you are not the first to go through this. Many others have walked the same path.

Please go through this thread as it relates to your issue as the sangat would give you the same advice as well.

Recite the banis, try to understand what message they portray, and fall in love with maharaj's feet, he s just testing you.

Attatch yourself to no other, except him. (Kis naal kee jay dosti, sab jagg chalan haar). Enshrine true love for the true lord only, rest everything is false.

Please go through this thread:

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=38964&st=0

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Thanks Jio,

I know it's been disucssed a million times on this thread, but you never expect it to happen to you.

I was brought onto the path because of her, always imagined we would chak amrit together....now I'm back to square 1.

LOL its a good test mind you...

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Guest som_Kuri
Thanks Jio,

I know it's been disucssed a million times on this thread, but you never expect it to happen to you.

I was brought onto the path because of her, always imagined we would chak amrit together....now I'm back to square 1.

LOL its a good test mind you...

so i take it the engagement is off btw WHAT A TEST!! eh!? be glad this happened before marriage and not after call it off man and find a decent kuri and DONT start thinking all girls are like this cos there are decent ones out there. erm if you dont mind me asking how did you find out and do you know the other guy???

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Thanks Jio,

I know it's been disucssed a million times on this thread, but you never expect it to happen to you.

I was brought onto the path because of her, always imagined we would chak amrit together....now I'm back to square 1.

LOL its a good test mind you...

.. :) ..test it is brother, sometimes breaks u everyday...Hang tight in there, you cant see Maharaj, but he's right there.

I d seen the world...half of it atleast, I had seen guys cheat on girls, and girls cheat on guys, and I never ever...through the whole experience of my life could ever imagine she would cheat on me..lie to me...I made mistakes too..I flirted and cheated once...but backed off within 2 weeks coz I felt so guilty...but I never thought she could do it...but she went a step further ...tortured me with accusations..things I didnt even do..ultimately I got hurt too deep just coz I didnt wanna let go..kept trying to save it...my mistake.

In my case, she used to do chaupai sahib (and i didnt even know what it meant) on the phone at night and I would listen, I didnt do path at all in those days. When we would fight, she would bring in the photo of harminder sahib hanging in her room to manaa mee, these things just make it very hardd...but all you can do is try to get closer to god...try to love him so much....try to get him to love u so much that you just dont have to come and go in this world anymore.

The work of karam's cannot be understood by us manmukhs, all we can do is, beg...beg and beg for his mercy..so that he may do kirpa and save the honour of our souls. Just dont attatch yourself to anyone else emotionally except the true lord.

Recite banis bro..

Jap ji sahib translations-along with the path ofcourse

I listen to this, its not too fast and you can read translations from searchgurbani.com or allaboutsikhs.com along with listening to the path.

http://sikhsangeet.com/albumid707-Ravinder...raas-Sahib.html

Theres also a software at www.allaboutsikhs.com (Search gurbani desktop version, it has translations of all the Guru's Banis, and Dasam Granth.

Charitropakhiyan-Now you can research on that, theres even a translation of it online in pdf format, the onl;y translation in fact, but it has a lot errors. And I wouldnt exactly recommend it to you at this stage. It is a part of Dasam Granth said to contain the viles of women, the character, the good, the bad, the worse, well mostly bad and worse, getting a lil deep into this discussion. Umm..I was trying to get a hold of SS.S kohli's translation of it, since he is one of the best or if not the best scholars of sikhism, however he is against charitropakhiyan and believes it will just send the wrong mssg to our community which is why he excluded it from his work of translating Dasam Granth ji. He did translate it, but I believe he as asked shrimni akali dal not to publish it, and its lying with them, and they didnt publish it. I too think that Guru Gobind singh ji didnt compose charitropakhiyan, rather some poets of his court did (Shyam etc), but there must be a reason they were included in Dasam granth in the first place.

Who knows, nevamind, went offtopic, pm me if you need the error filled translations.

Rest, just Love vaheguru, Recite bani, atleast one everyday, at the least. ANd read translations along. Baki...uthde bethde simrin Vaheguru, Har Har da; and you'll be fine in no time;)

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Thanks Jio,

I know it's been disucssed a million times on this thread, but you never expect it to happen to you.

I was brought onto the path because of her, always imagined we would chak amrit together....now I'm back to square 1.

LOL its a good test mind you...

this might sound odd.. but I felt depending on others for Sikhi is a bit like using a slingshot to propell a stone forward. The slingshot will help u get so far, however, the stone will eventually need to let go off the slingshot to achieve its true distance through the sky.

I hope that made sense :6

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Guest Bhajan Singh
To cut a long story short, I found out my fiance cheated on me.

We were both very much into Sikhi and she is from a good Gursikh family.

We were NOT physical in anyway and had a proper 'punjabi' engagement.

Shes cheated on me and now I'm devastetd.

How does one derive support from situation like this?

I feel lost, but i do not feel like giving up my saroop, however I feel I've dropped 10 rungs on the ladder and need to climb up again.

Naam Simran is fine and I'm happy to try and do that, but I just thought I'd post my sad sob story and just warn all those who think they are in a good loving and happy engagement/marrage to just be careful you don't put all your emotion into it and less in your true parter (Maharaji). KalYug is so very real and it's amazing how the people you look up to as good and wise 'Gursikhs' can actually be so very much different to your expectation.

The hard part is picking up the pieces and moving on, espicially when all my crys to Maharaji are left unheard.

How long did you know your fiance before you got engaged?

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3 years.....mad isnt it...two faced and horrid people can be.

Oh well.....and I found out in the worst possible way...i won't even go into details but imagine what could be the worst and multiply that by 10 times.

What makes its worse...there is little remorse...

To hurt the feelings of another human being is a major sin, I just hope Maharaji doesnt give out really bad karma to her based on her actions towards me and the way she hurt me.

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We are living in ghor kaliyug where the humans have degenerated to a shameless level.

These days marriages(both amritdharis and non-amritdharis) have become a sort of business deal based on kaam(physical roop), caste, property and immigration.

Without Naam, we have no friend. This shud be a teaching lesson for you. I know it is very painful but if/when you get out of it, it shud make you a more smart and spiritual human being.

We all are females and Akal Purakh is our Husband, this is the only marriage we shud all be thinking of.

JAGAT MAIN JHOOTHI DEKHI PREET.

APNE HE SUKH SEO SAB LAAGE KYAA DARAA KYAA MEET.

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