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Fiance Cheated Need Support/advice


Manchester_Sikhi
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We all are females and Akal Purakh is our Husband, this is the only marriage we shud all be thinking of.

JAGAT MAIN JHOOTHI DEKHI PREET.

APNE HE SUKH SEO SAB LAAGE KYAA DARAA KYAA MEET.

^^Some true great words Bhai Harinder Singh

Our souls are all soulbride's and MAHARAJ, Vaheguru, the Lord Har Har is our bridegroom. Only that is the TRUTH.

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Guest _Singh_

does anyone else know i.e. the families PLUS what has she said, does she want to call it off now? how will you break it to your parents...........this is serious ALOT of people are going to get hurt e.g. relatives who have emotionally invested into this engagement you know.......so what are your plans now? did she tell you why she did it?

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It's really tough not to get emotionally attached to people you know, especially to the one you are engaged too. I know I have gotten attached to people I barely knew !!! I can feel your pain, in the end, you already know what the answer is. It's Gurbani. I would recommend reading Guru Tegh Bhadur Jee's bani as much as you can. Guru Sahib has especially talked about attachment a lot. I know that when I was going though MASSIVE attachment, Guru Sahib's bani helped me a lot.

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=698

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=1598

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2060

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2061

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2062

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2394

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2395

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2396

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2397

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2398

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2399

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2400

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2401

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2402

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2403

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2405

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2615

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2617

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2667

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2669

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2753

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2778

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=3137

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4221

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4222

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4404

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4405

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4406

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4407

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=4900

I realize that's a lot of shabads, but more the merrier :)

If you do not have the time to read gurbani for about 1 hour everyday, I would HIGHLY recommend doing abhiyaas of mool mantr (until nanak hosi bhi sach). It is EXTREMELY powerful in changing state of your mind.

Maybe Guru Sahib help you. After all, every hardship in life only makes us stronger. But as always, It's easy to say but extremely hard to follow.

Guru Rakha

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I am amazed, I am amazed at you Paji. You have the courage the strength to speak about this to the Sangat, when other people would have kept it hidden....that Sikha takes true courage!

Which ever person has given you up has lost a true diamond, may guru bless you with eternal happiness. You have kept your faith, that shows what kind of GurSikh you are!

Wa sikha wa, you don't need mooraks like me giving you advice, you are already above!

Waheguroooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

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<<< We were both very much into Sikhi and she is from a good Gursikh family.>>>

Dear Veer, after chakking amrit, I used to go to smagams of a well known jathaa and the jathaa or the dera culture is terribly bad. These people use the gursikhi cover(bhekh) to do some really terrible things. Such people are also very greedy about money, immigration.

The best way to find a marriage partner is to find some HONOURABLE family(not necessarily very spiritual), the bibi shud be ANAKHI and shud have a spiritual bent of mind.(not necessarily amritdhari).Then if u can inspire her to chakk amrit and keep rehit, such a bibi will become a very good faithful life partner.

At smagams, there are quite a few bibis with dastars and gursikhi bhekh but are pretty "easy" girls and get easily pattit with fellow amrithdhari boys. Such bibis also hunt for NRI boys.Such bibis will make terrible wives in the future.

GO FOR AN ANAKHI BIBI. The bibi shud have SELF RESPECT.

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To cut a long story short, I found out my fiance cheated on me.

We were both very much into Sikhi and she is from a good Gursikh family.

We were NOT physical in anyway and had a proper 'punjabi' engagement.

Shes cheated on me and now I'm devastetd.

How does one derive support from situation like this?

I feel lost, but i do not feel like giving up my saroop, however I feel I've dropped 10 rungs on the ladder and need to climb up again.

Naam Simran is fine and I'm happy to try and do that, but I just thought I'd post my sad sob story and just warn all those who think they are in a good loving and happy engagement/marrage to just be careful you don't put all your emotion into it and less in your true parter (Maharaji). KalYug is so very real and it's amazing how the people you look up to as good and wise 'Gursikhs' can actually be so very much different to your expectation.

The hard part is picking up the pieces and moving on, espicially when all my crys to Maharaji are left unheard.

Bro to put it openly...in this day and age most of our punjabi/desi women dont honour, guard or respect their bodies until marriage as they used to in previous generations, temptation is everywhere. It is far easier for women to fall into the trap of cheating because many men try it on them wheras most women wont come onto a man. So my advice would be never get involved with someone who you dont know everything about, always have other options so that you are not devestated if like in your case things dont work out. In time you will find someone who truely respects you and respects themself and will never compramise you for someone else..... put it down to a harsh learning experience. Karma will eventually catch up on her, I've known girls who like to be players but now cant find a decent desi/punjabi guy who will marry them because of the reputation they have got.

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Guest _Singhni_
To cut a long story short, I found out my fiance cheated on me.

We were both very much into Sikhi and she is from a good Gursikh family.

We were NOT physical in anyway and had a proper 'punjabi' engagement.

Shes cheated on me and now I'm devastetd.

How does one derive support from situation like this?

I feel lost, but i do not feel like giving up my saroop, however I feel I've dropped 10 rungs on the ladder and need to climb up again.

Naam Simran is fine and I'm happy to try and do that, but I just thought I'd post my sad sob story and just warn all those who think they are in a good loving and happy engagement/marrage to just be careful you don't put all your emotion into it and less in your true parter (Maharaji). KalYug is so very real and it's amazing how the people you look up to as good and wise 'Gursikhs' can actually be so very much different to your expectation.

The hard part is picking up the pieces and moving on, espicially when all my crys to Maharaji are left unheard.

Bro to put it openly...in this day and age most of our punjabi/desi women dont honour, guard or respect their bodies until marriage as they used to in previous generations, temptation is everywhere. It is far easier for women to fall into the trap of cheating because many men try it on them wheras most women wont come onto a man. So my advice would be never get involved with someone who you dont know everything about, always have other options so that you are not devestated if like in your case things dont work out. In time you will find someone who truely respects you and respects themself and will never compramise you for someone else..... put it down to a harsh learning experience. Karma will eventually catch up on her, I've known girls who like to be players but now cant find a decent desi/punjabi guy who will marry them because of the reputation they have got.

just because people are young doesnt automatically mean they are decent and just because people married later or are yet to marry doesnt mean that they have got around. Im 25 and ive never had a boyfriend or kissed etc and am waiting til marriage THEN AGAIN i know an 17 year old amritdhari girl who has had 5 boyfriends and got up to all sorts before taking amrit. she is sooo scared she will be rejected cos of her past...........at the end of the people are different so DONT generalise ......people who marry young may not be emotionally mature enough for marriage so it MAY lead to divorce etc people need to look at all angles of a situation i guess.......

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I will take your word that she did something terribly wrong which accounts to cheating.

Can i ask, how did you come to know ?

Because personally, i don't trust gossip or chugli !

Anyway you were engaged for 3 years, man that is a very long period of time.

This was like asking for trouble, nowdays even punjabans and pendu kurian don't remain faithful for such a long time without marriage and you are talking about Manchester !

There is no way to know for sure whose character less or not, One has to make a decision based on personal+families know abouts. In most of the arranged marriages bride & the groom just obey their parents wishes no questions asked.

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