Jump to content

Hitting Bottom


Tony
 Share

Recommended Posts

Fateh .. . . .

I dont know even know how to start this.

Life is slapping me so so hard now a days that i dont know where is stand. But wanna share this with my brothers and sisters here.

I am in my mid-age, and my wife had decided to leave me and taken kids with her. This was a few weeks ago. Been to see her a few times but she is adement on not coming back. I have felt the pain of this and have been begging her to come back; but nothing seems to be changing her mind. It was due to my faults and some of hers too.

Anyho, was still trying to sort that mess out when I have been informed today that the whole dept that I work in is being slashed; so no more job either.

Been trying to do Path and simran but cant focus either. So not sure what to do. How do I get my wife/life back. I did use to have a v strong faith but I am just feeling that it is being eroded by the harsh realities of life. I do path but just skim the readings. Not taking anything in.

Appreicate advise.

thanks

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Waheguru Ji Ka Kahsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh

Veer Ji

I am very sorry that this has happened to you, the next step to getting you life back on track and finding your path is to

1 - Go to your Gurudwara (this may not be your local, but anywhere you are comfortable)

2 - Do Ardass in front of Maharajah, this can be as long as you want. I have once stood and cryed in front of Maharajah!

3 - Take a huknama from Maharajah and understand it, if you don't get the gani or some one you trust that knows how to explain the hukam for you.

Only Maharajah can give you the guidance you are looking for....only Waheguru has answers you need.

Good luck veer ji.

Waheguru Ji Ka Kahsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Waheguru Ji Ka Kahsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh

Veer Ji

I am very sorry that this has happened to you, the next step to getting you life back on track and finding your path is to

1 - Go to your Gurudwara (this may not be your local, but anywhere you are comfortable)

2 - Do Ardass in front of Maharajah, this can be as long as you want. I have once stood and cryed in front of Maharajah!

3 - Take a huknama from Maharajah and understand it, if you don't get the gani or some one you trust that knows how to explain the hukam for you.

Only Maharajah can give you the guidance you are looking for....only Waheguru has answers you need.

Good luck veer ji.

Waheguru Ji Ka Kahsa, Waheguru Ji Ke Fateh

read www.thesecret.tv..get some inspiration.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Remember that as a Child of God, you are blessed with the Grace, Power, and Ability to overcome any obstacle He sends your way."

I'm sorry i have nothing of real life practical value to lend to you. I've never been in anywhere near this situation, and so i'd feel kind of hypocritical to offer you any advice.... but all I can say is to control the things you CAN control... You CAN control your mental reaction, and try to keep that as humanly upbeat as possible (i.e, don't give in to depressive thoughts, at the very worst, remain neutral.. obviously i can't expect you to be happy-go-lucky and jolly, but do your best to avoid the deep down depressive thoughts)... on the job front, chances are you're doing some work that someone else can use... Finding a job is obviously much easier when you've have some good experience....

Again, sorry that I can't contribute anything w.r.t your family situation.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fateh .....

thought i will share what has happened in the past few days:

- I have become slightly more stronger. Guess time heals as they say but it still hurts like hell.

- I have been reciting bani but something strange has happened. I read bani but dont have my

heart in it. So just for example sake: I can do morning nitnem within 15/20 mins; rehrass sahib

in literally under 10 mins. I do ask for forgiveness in ardass; but the point is that i feel inside

that i have really lost my faith. How do I get it back. As thats the only thing that will give me some

peace inside.

No progress on the job side; got a few interviews lined up; but lets see.

On the marriage side; she is not communicating at all. In summary FFFFKkkked up.... (sorry abt that)

I need serious help with bringing my faith back. As thats the only thing that had me going till now and losing it makes it feel even worse.

Fateh . ... . .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The hardest thing to do will be to keep your NEGATIVE emotions out of it. The most important thing to do is to keep your negative emotions out of it. Immersing yourself in bani will go a long ways.

At some point, you will need to communicate as the interest of the children in staying in touch with their father comes ahead of interests of you and your wife.

Excellent comments in posts above. Don't skim over them. Read them slowly and think about them. No quick solution. You have the control and you will have to work at all of the above. Be strong and make the best of yourself for yourself and others.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fateh . . .

Understand I should be doing patth slowly and ensuring that I understand it. The thing is I get other feelings and emotions inside me if I dont do it quickly.

even if i blink i get the emotional thoughts entering my mind and distracting me. Anyway hope to keep on trying. Hopefully Maharaj will do kirpa on me one day.

Just pray that day is a lot more quicker like today.....

Fateh.. . . ..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest _GKaur_

Faith is a very funny thing. If you dont mind id like to use an example from a novel i had to read for school lol.

the guy was a priest, he was married and wit kids, but he had a secret affair with another woman who gave birth to a boy. The woman died few years later and the priest always felt guilty because he never publicly declared that the kid was his and his responsibility. He had also lost his faith in God. So the kid goes through life and finally comes to realize that the priest is his father. His mother used to wear a dress that the priest knew about , so one night the boy leaves a mannequin dressed in his mothers dress. He knocks on his fathers door and when the man comes out he cant see if its really a woman standing there or just his hallucination because there is a light coming from behind her. The priest breaks down and confesses to his crime and suddenly his "faith" in God is back because God have him a chance to redeem himself because God sent the woman's ghost back so he could confess his crime.

Faith is something that is always there and if you "loose" it then it was never there to begin with. Everyone has times where life is tough on them veer ji-thats no reason to point the finger at God for what happened to you. You should never ask God why he did this to you, but rather thank God that hes there with you in your time of need. You have to realize that we have done many paaps in our lifetime and lifetimes before this and thank him for finally giving you a chance to be in his sharan in your repentance.

Realize now the important lesson he has taught you. Family and kaam are only part of this dream of the living. Its a fragile as glass and easy to break. Your true friend is Waheguru and only Waheguru. After your wife left you, you lost your job, who has been there with you? He hasnt abandoned you so dont abandon him with this talk of loosing faith veer ji. Things said can never be unsaid.

waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share

  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt


  • Topics

  • Posts

    • yeh it's true, we shouldn't be lazy and need to learn jhatka shikaar. It doesn't help some of grew up in surrounding areas like Slough and Southall where everyone thought it was super bad for amrit dharis to eat meat, and they were following Sant babas and jathas, and instead the Singhs should have been normalising jhatka just like the recent world war soldiers did. We are trying to rectifiy this and khalsa should learn jhatka.  But I am just writing about bhog for those that are still learning rehit. As I explained, there are all these negative influences in the panth that talk against rehit, but this shouldn't deter us from taking khanda pahul, no matter what level of rehit we are!
    • How is it going to help? The link is of a Sikh hunter. Fine, but what good does that do the lazy Sikh who ate khulla maas in a restaurant? By the way, for the OP, yes, it's against rehit to eat khulla maas.
    • Yeah, Sikhs should do bhog of food they eat. But the point of bhog is to only do bhog of food which is fit to be presented to Maharaj. It's not maryada to do bhog of khulla maas and pretend it's OK to eat. It's not. Come on, bro, you should know better than to bring this Sakhi into it. Is this Sikh in the restaurant accompanied by Guru Gobind Singh ji? Is he fighting a dharam yudh? Or is he merely filling his belly with the nearest restaurant?  Please don't make a mockery of our puratan Singhs' sacrifices by comparing them to lazy Sikhs who eat khulla maas.
    • Seriously?? The Dhadi is trying to be cute. For those who didn't get it, he said: "Some say Maharaj killed bakras (goats). Some say he cut the heads of the Panj Piyaras. The truth is that they weren't goats. It was she-goats (ਬਕਰੀਆਂ). He jhatka'd she-goats. Not he-goats." Wow. This is possibly the stupidest thing I've ever heard in relation to Sikhi.
    • Instead of a 9 inch or larger kirpan, take a smaller kirpan and put it (without gatra) inside your smaller turban and tie the turban tightly. This keeps a kirpan on your person without interfering with the massage or alarming the masseuse. I'm not talking about a trinket but rather an actual small kirpan that fits in a sheath (you'll have to search to find one). As for ahem, "problems", you could get a male masseuse. I don't know where you are, but in most places there are professional masseuses who actually know what they are doing and can really relieve your muscle pains.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use