Advice On Friendship!

[Guest Guest]

THATS WHY ITS BETTER SINGHS AND SINGHNIS DONT GET TOO CLOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE OTHERWISE THESE PROBLEMS DONT HAPPEN!!!!!!

[ANT4RJ4MI]

THATS WHY ITS BETTER SINGHS AND SINGHNIS DONT GET TOO CLOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE OTHERWISE THESE PROBLEMS DONT HAPPEN!!!!!!

SO VERYYYYYYYYY TRUE .. WE SHOULD GO BACK TO THE CAVES ..SINGHS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGH .REMAKE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN .. SINGHNIS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGHNIS ...MAKE ..UMMM ..I DUNNO WHAT : |

[Revolutionary]

Pyar vich hi Rabb hai : )

Jerhe Ishq Di Baazi Khele Ne, Ohna Nu Pata Lagda Rabb Keho Jeha Hai

Dillagi te ishq vich zameen asmaan da farak eh.. Dillagi vich hamesha rohna, par ishq vich zindagi eh

[TruSoul]

WJKK WJKF!!

Basically im a 18 yr old Amritdhaari and i been speakin to this Singhni for about a year now or just maybe under. She told me about 2 months after that she "liked" me in that way. She said she would get over it and it was just a phase so we left it and carried on as normal. However she told me again today that she still got feelings for me and wants to see where it would go.

I dont see her like that at all, she really just isnt my type and we would be betta off being friends. It could easily ruin our friendship that we have. And im a person who cant say "no" to anyone so i had 2 put the phone down and pretend it ran outta battery! Help me i dont know what to do!

lol, thats a good one il have to remember that one!.

Your " no " will have to come with reasons why no. Trust she will ask why / reasons so be ready. (say your gay... lol only joking). Just tell her the truth, but also tell her why you like her as a friend might help ease the pain for her. Eitherway things are not going to be the same, it will forever be on the back of yours and her mind.

THATS WHY ITS BETTER SINGHS AND SINGHNIS DONT GET TOO CLOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE OTHERWISE THESE PROBLEMS DONT HAPPEN!!!!!!

SO VERYYYYYYYYY TRUE .. WE SHOULD GO BACK TO THE CAVES ..SINGHS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGH .REMAKE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN .. SINGHNIS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGHNIS ...MAKE ..UMMM ..I DUNNO WHAT : |

Creasing !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can see it now BrokeSinghBack Mountain

[Guest Horrible]

Been in these relationships, led the gurl on and regret what I did. Just be honest with her. Sometimes you can't be friends anymore, but its for the best.

[Guest Guest]

THATS WHY ITS BETTER SINGHS AND SINGHNIS DONT GET TOO CLOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE OTHERWISE THESE PROBLEMS DONT HAPPEN!!!!!!

SO VERYYYYYYYYY TRUE .. WE SHOULD GO BACK TO THE CAVES ..SINGHS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGH .REMAKE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN .. SINGHNIS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGHNIS ...MAKE ..UMMM ..I DUNNO WHAT : |

I SERIOUSLY DONT KNOW WHAT U ON ABOUT!!!! BUT IF U LOOK AT THE LIVES OF SAINTS, THEY NEVER WASTED THEIR TIME IN IDLE TALK WITH ANYONE INCLUDING SINGHNIS. OUR TRUE RELATIONSHIP IS WITH VAHEGURU, SO LETS FOCUS ON THAT!!!!

[Guest _Tubelight_]

People need to grow a brain! The whole thing about if "boys and girls didn't get close, this wouldn't happen" does not work !!! I'm the living proof of that.

Idiots giving idiotic responses <_<

THATS WHY ITS BETTER SINGHS AND SINGHNIS DONT GET TOO CLOSE IN THE FIRST PLACE OTHERWISE THESE PROBLEMS DONT HAPPEN!!!!!!

SO VERYYYYYYYYY TRUE .. WE SHOULD GO BACK TO THE CAVES ..SINGHS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGH .REMAKE BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN .. SINGHNIS SHOULD STAY WITH SINGHNIS ...MAKE ..UMMM ..I DUNNO WHAT : |

I SERIOUSLY DONT KNOW WHAT U ON ABOUT!!!! BUT IF U LOOK AT THE LIVES OF SAINTS, THEY NEVER WASTED THEIR TIME IN IDLE TALK WITH ANYONE INCLUDING SINGHNIS. OUR TRUE RELATIONSHIP IS WITH VAHEGURU, SO LETS FOCUS ON THAT!!!!

and yet you are wasting your time arguing with him :rolleyes:

[Guest just a singh]

bhaji, my parents say that its ok to talk to bhenjis in the sangat, but at the same time they say, dont get too close, if you notice something about her, like she wants to be a bit closer to you,

tell her to kindly to keep her distance. Because at the end of the day you could ruin her life and your life. If you dont tell her, then yes in a way you are leading her on, and she may try harder

to get you to say you like her or whateva. At this emotional age, its hard. I know every amritdhari goes through it, but you have to make the most sensible choice.

i suggest that if you do not like her, tell her that you are sorry but you dont feel the same way about her, if that doesnt work then your friendship may be crushed, depending on how strong this girl is on the inside.

I would also say that this love or maybe even lust gets in the way of a good friendship and sikhi infact. Please tell her that you like being friends, but just friends.

[CaptainQ]

Best to read jeevani's of Sant, Mahapurkhs, Shaheed Singhs instead of reading replies from kids on the internet which includes me lol

read this chapter from 'Say Kinehiya', autobiography of Sant Baba Harnam Singh Jee Rampur Khera Wale

THE WILLPOWER OF BABA JI

Baba Ji used to mention that during the years he spent serving

sadhu Santokh Das in his village, one day he casually told Baba Ji that,

"When a youth steps into manhood, he should lower his gaze, as a mark

of humility. For those who do not, are often deceived by what they

see." The sadhu's words became engraved on Baba Ji's heart. When

Baba Ji was returning home that day, a young lady was turning the

corner into the street. Upon seeing Baba Ji, this young lady pulled her

veil over her face, as was the custom in those days (as a measure of

modesty young women would cover themselves in front of men). Baba

Ji thought, "This woman covered her face in my presence because she

considers me to be grown up. I must therefore behave like an elder and

lower my gaze."

The next day, when Baba Ji was going towards the fields to work,

a respectable elder from the village saw him passing and called out to

Baba Ji. On calling him over he said, "Harnam Singh, I need to advise

you on a matter. Do not take it wrongly." Baba Ji replied very politely,

"Bapu1 Ji, please say what you must without hesitation, I trust it will be

for my benefit only." The old gentleman said, "Man's youth is like a

flooded river of emotions. If one loses their foothold in the water, you

are carried with the water and only good fortune of your destiny can

save you. You are deeply religious, even in your youth. Be vigilant of

the mind and careful of your emotions. Do not look upon anyone with

vanity or lust. That's all! This alone is the way to save yourself from

misdeeds."This advice from the elder reinforced Baba Ji's earlier

conviction. Miraculously, the old man's words sank deeply and firmly

into his being. This incident gave Baba Ji such great fortitude and

willpower that, for the 34 years he lived amongst his family and the

village, he never looked upon another woman with bad intentions. He

would go about his daily work, in and around his house with his gaze

lowered, in respect and humility. As a result, of this thinking, lustful thoughts would never arise in his mind or cloud his conscience. Except for his mother, Baba Ji would avoid trivial chitchat with other women.

Thus, in his behaviour, he fulfilled the words of Bhagat Namdev Ji…

He who forsakes another's wealth

He who forsakes another's woman

Near him alone does

God (the man lion) abide

par Dhan par daaraa parharee.

taa kai nikat basai narharee

(Bhagat Namdev Ji, page 1163)

He whose eyes gaze not

Upon the beauty of another's wife

Who serves the holy Saints lovingly

taa kai nikat basai narharee

saaDh kee tahal satsang hayt.

(Gauri Sukhmani 5th Guru, page 274)

These lines of Gurbani became the pillars of Baba Ji's chastity.

He did not feel any temptation from desires, in attaining spiritual heights.

He believed that the eyes play a major role in making our mind wander

outside. Whatever a man sees with his eyes, is received by the mind

and under the attraction of materialistic things, the mind then wanders

outwardly. The more we try to control this extrovert nature of the mind,

the quicker we'll be able to concentrate our mind on meditation. All

spiritual achievements are proportional to the concentration of our mind.

It is essential that the mind be controlled, by restraining the eyes.

http://www.rampurkhera.net/files/sekinehiya2006.pdf