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Jag_Singh
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I remember talking to somebody about this exact same situation and the guy came out with something which made perfect sense to me at the time (Il try explain what he said as best i can.)

He said that when we do things, rather then tell everybody who cares to listen, you can inform the person by actions. For instance, going back to your driving example if you was to be seen driving around etc, your mates would assume you've passed your test, and being admitted to a top uni college illustrates your grades. This way your seen as humble and not a show off. After all, all of our achievments are blessing from maharaaj, without his help we wouldnt achieve much if anything at all:

Kabeer, nothing is mine within myself. Whatever there is, is Yours, O Waheguru Ji.

If I surrender to You what is already Yours, what does it cost me? ||203||

so in a way, our achievements, are not ours at all!!

hope this helps

.

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I agree with everyone, but we also can't completely stop people from being jealous or throwing negativity at us. Some people even get jealous when other people appear at peace and not as flustered or stressed out as they are.

In these cases I find it best to try not to think of them at all, maintain your peaceful state and focus on whats important. Their jealousy is their own problem not yours and getting flustered, angry or scared would be falling right into their trap as they're the reactions their aiming to get out of you and you're feeding them victory.

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So, I want to talk about the truth. Talking to people in a general conversation is one of many way to understand what people/sangat are like. I've had a question on my mind for a while now, how much truth should we expose to people/sangat? by sangat/people I mean all sorts, that includes amritdharis, sehejdharis, atheists, other backgrounds and faiths.......people you know for a long time, good friends, bad friends, etc

For me, I personally think giving out more truth to anyone pretty much get's you suffer more consequences in the future. And the more truth I talk to people the more problems I end up getting.

I'm sick and tired of lying my way through life, just to hide the truth, but then I understand by hiding the truth saves alot of people........so I'm in deep turmoil. It's like people want to take advantage of you just so they can shine....

All opinions are welcome smile.gif

In society there are two kinds of people.

Bad People (Liars) - People who lie to other, spread rumors, make false statements to hurt other people

Good people (Honest) - People who speak truth to hurt others. May be you heard these common phrases, "main taan sachiyan sunaunda haan".

Common in both is that they enjoy hurting other people.

Diffrence in both is that

Liars know the truth but they lie to others

Honest people are honest to others but doesnot know the truth that they are hurting others and covering it (by saying guru told us to be honest and we are not responsible if it hurt others, we have to speak truth)

I dont think it is right to judge people depending on weather he/she is lieing or speaking truth.

I believe there are three stages a person go thru

First- Intentions. What you really want to do.

Second- your action, communicating by lieing or truthfully or by anyother way.

Third - Results longterm and shorterm (expected or unexpected)

If someone got hurt

what was your intentions?

Was you able to communicate properly?

You are fully responsible for these two parts.

Results depend more on other people, you are not responsible for that. But if someone is close and you feel responsible for others' problems too then deal with it. You can help other people in their problems instead of walking away.

Many people try to teach that speaking truth is always right thing and lieing is always bad. But it doesnot make sense to me.

Why you are speaking truth or why are you lieing is important.

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Truth, being true. Its very complicated subject.

First of all, make a mind that you are going to be true.

Talking about ur situation about sharing with family members. Yes, those problems do exist in almost all the families. The underlying reason not to tolerate truth is jealousy. Not being good enough to be like what you are and so being jealous for your success. I see it all the time. in my unique situation, I have decided that I am going to do the right thing, do what feels right to me, the person on the other side is going to feel disturbed with my success. But I keep in mind that I dont intend to hurt that person by living my own life the way I dream it or way babaji makes me to live. If the other person feels jealous and stopped talking to you, its their insecurity thats making them do that. I don't care as long as I am not intentionally making them feel bad. My success is my own life, which is run by babaji anyways. The only thing I do ardas for is that babaji os bande/bandee nu sojhi bakhshan ke jo meree zindgee vich ho riha hai, thats all babaji's will. Every person has their life to live. We are all drops in sea, we do make waves with our actions. Just be careful about not hurting others on purpose, otherwise just live your life in a true way. and do ardas, that babaji give some successes to other person as well, so that they don't pay much attention to your actions, but create their own successes.

You won't be able to stop people being jealous. Just change your focus. stay focused on what is right to do in your life and help others in any way possible without creating a storm in their life or your life. And yes, live the truthful life. Very important. one lie leads to thousands/million lies. Better not to just get started on the wrong foot.

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So, I want to talk about the truth. Talking to people in a general conversation is one of many way to understand what people/sangat are like. I've had a question on my mind for a while now, how much truth should we expose to people/sangat? by sangat/people I mean all sorts, that includes amritdharis, sehejdharis, atheists, other backgrounds and faiths.......people you know for a long time, good friends, bad friends, etc

For me, I personally think giving out more truth to anyone pretty much get's you suffer more consequences in the future. And the more truth I talk to people the more problems I end up getting.

I'm sick and tired of lying my way through life, just to hide the truth, but then I understand by hiding the truth saves alot of people........so I'm in deep turmoil. It's like people want to take advantage of you just so they can shine....

All opinions are welcome :)

When you are around atheist its not recommended that you speak about Sikhi because they will try to twist around things , but if they are genuinely asking questions then it is ok to answer but dont just go around talking about Sikhi.

Speaking the truth shouldnt be a punishment. It is a blessing and a gift. If others want to use it against you then dont be around that type of sangat. Truth doesnt mean opinion, opinions can be false and mislead.

Learn to talk less around people.

Hiding the truth "saves" alot of people???????? :6 What makes you say that???????????? :umm:

ਸਚੁ ਸੰਜਮੁ ਕਰਣੀ ਸੋ ਕਰੇ ਗੁਰਮੁਖਿ ਹੋਇ ਪਰਗਾਸੁ ॥

Practicing truth, self-discipline and good deeds, the Gurmukh is enlightened.

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A person ask's you how much bani do you read (a general hating person), would you lie and say you hardly read any??? Because if you tell them the truth, then doesn't it lead to 'homai' 'pride' which others have mentioned......

no its called truth, if you read alot then tell the truth say alot, if you dont read much then tell the truth and say not much (its very simple) hamaui is different then answering a question. Your not boasting that you read a lot of bani unless you start speaking in ego. pride doesnt mean answering with truth.

Most people can understand basic concepts, they have very out of context opinions. Kaam doesnt just mean lusting in sexual desire it also means lusting for cars, power, money, fame etc and thats why Guru Sahib says not to care about what everyone else has or eventually youll start lusting for what the "jones's got'

Anger is the most simple to understand and moh is the most difficult to separate from.

Speaking the truth is fairly easy, now the outcome of speaking truth should not arouse any of the other vices or then your mind is very ill from paanj doots.

Learn that lame things in life that lead you to not wanting to speak the truth are to be avoided. Dont get caught up in everything that is not worth anything.

Speak the truth as this is the only way to understand the rest of Sikhi, lots pretend their Sikhi is advancing but without truth youre stuck in nuetral or going in reverse.

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