My Wedding

[Papi]

Creates a false statement then give a reason to defend it. Next time i'll say pigs can fly and present a video showing pigs can't fly. What a smart plan

Hain?!!! :6

[Guest MiltAthiest]

im the only person who has shakked amrit in my family.

im getting married to a singh who whos parents are amrit shakked along with his bro/sis.

benti, i dont want no arguments on this topic just advice please.

i will give you a brief outline of the wedding.

friday-

saturday-

sunday- wedding at gurdwara, milni, + cake cutting ceremony at gurdwara, kirtan/dhadhi, photos, hopefully gataka too

well sunday is all i am sure about, both of us have already asked parents and my singhs side of the family have sorted their side of the wedding out.

if i hire a marquee for my garden and have kirtan programme there with maharaj presence. (friday), it will be all clean, beautiful decorated.

please note - no meat or alcohol will be present throughout the wedding days.

if then on saturday, have a party in the same marquee after changing the flooring, decoratings, put a few tables in. if there is no meat or alcohol is that not ok? i mean there will be no dirty songs just giddah, jagooh etc. i am the only amrit shakked person in my household and my family. is this not understandable? they will not listen to me. so i thought that would be ok? please help me

lol..... i dont know what to say..... but this is really sad how you cant decide for your self.

[Guest Gupt]

Hi to the poster as suggestions have been made go to the panj pyare they can guide you in the right direction. Other things you can do is also do ardas to maharaj jee and then all shall become clear.

Right to the next point Milt Atheist has been told before but then again he is entitled to his opinion even if it is not helpfull to the topic lol :D

Then the last point is about the poster _Ragmla= fake_ you did right to answer to Milt Atheist in that way but that does not mean causing trouble urself by saying that Raagmala is fake come on think abit as you said in your post think before posting. Well hint hint. Lets not get into the whole Raagmala debate now.

Plus this topic is pretty good seen as though marriage is a big part of Gurmat and getting every detail right is a must according to gursikhi/gurmat rehat. So lets see some proper replies and help cos i don't think the poster is in this situation by themselves as there are loads more people in the same predicament so the poster is not alone.

And as the earlier posts have mentioned don't be lenient because marriage is a big part of your life and really it should be one of the best days of your life, and not looking back and thinking I should have done this or that.

Also a last suggestion would be sit down with your husband to be they will also be a good helping hand.

Stay in chardikala

[khalsa_lioness]

WJKK WJKF

I would like to say from experience it is very difficult when it comes to marriage. Me and my Singh got married 3yrs ago. I also faced some family difficulties as we both wanted a gurmat Anand Karaj but families want something else. From my experience I spoke to my parents and they understood how we wanted the Anand Karaj day to be. At the end of the day the Anand Karaj was and is the most important part of the wedding. All the other stuff punjabi families want to do not matter. As long as we had the Anand Karaj day as we wanted I personally felt that you have to compromise. If your family want to have a get together on the night before then I dont see why you should feel thats its not allowed. I personally enjoyed the night before my family because as being very very close to my family it gave us a final chance to sit, talk, laugh and chill together before I got married.

From personal experience I let my family have the day before as they wanted because the main day was when we were infront of Maharaj having our Anand Karaj. Thats what mattered to me and my singh, not the petty little things people say 'hauw u shouldnt allow this and hauw you shouldnt allow that'. As long as you are happy with the way you have planned the day of Anand Karaj, I would say enjoy the last few days with your family(That does not mean I am saying have a party etc), just enjoy talking, siting and laughing with them.

Remember everyone on the forum is just giving advice and at the end it is totally up to you how you want the days before your Anand Karaj to be.

P.S If you have the maiyaan stuff then get them to make it very oily and sliperry so it doesnt stick to the kesh and just rolls off.

WJKK WJKF

[Gurmat Sangeet]

She can't decide what for herself?? She doesn't know whether what she is doing is ok according to gurmat so she is asking... Please think before posting

screw the discussion im disgusted by the forums admin who apparently hold a pro Sri Raagmala stance, to allow fools with guest i.d's such as this fools.

As for the discussion, IMHO penji what you have proposed would be fine. At the end of the day, it is a wedding and not a funeral. Family who arent exactly gurmukhs will want to have a laugh and good time. You have done the Gurmat thing by not allowing meat, sharab or dirty songs. Most people on this forum come from hardcore amritdhari families, or are too immature to understand your situation, because the world doesnt work like they way they imagine it does in their lala land...

[Papi]

Most people on this forum come from hardcore amritdhari families, or are too immature to understand your situation, because the world doesnt work like they way they imagine it does in their lala land...

:lol: so true!

[Only five]

She can't decide what for herself?? She doesn't know whether what she is doing is ok according to gurmat so she is asking... Please think before posting

screw the discussion im disgusted by the forums admin who apparently hold a pro Sri Raagmala stance, to allow fools with guest i.d's such as this fools.

As for the discussion, IMHO penji what you have proposed would be fine. At the end of the day, it is a wedding and not a funeral. Family who arent exactly gurmukhs will want to have a laugh and good time. You have done the Gurmat thing by not allowing meat, sharab or dirty songs. Most people on this forum come from hardcore amritdhari families, or are too immature to understand your situation, because the world doesnt work like they way they imagine it does in their lala land...

Nice to know Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's Khalsa is in lala land for you and is to hardcore. When Guru Nanak Dev ji came onto this earth. What was happening. The Hindus were having a blast burning women alive. Muslims were having a a blast stoning women. Is your method to have fun any better. Wanting a party or going to one shows that the person is weak. They can't see the raas coming from Gurbani. So what does this poor human do, he/she try's to find excitment in the going to parties and having a good time. Right!!!! Does that sound like reality to you. Going the to the Gurdwara and have Guru Sahib darshan is a ritual for this person. They bow out of formalty.

You want to become a Khalsa then follow Gurmat otherwise there are many other ways that claim you can find God.

The same people claim I read this much Bani, I do this much bhagti. All rituals. Then they whine, how come Guru Sahib didn't bless me with his darshan. And finally step from these moorakhs is telling everyone that you can't reach the highest state. The state I have reached is it. There is nothing above this. Then comes the excuse. We are humans God made us to be humans it's natural to live in in lust, anger, ego, attachment, greed. Why else would he make it. All just stones waiting to sink on that day.

[Gurmat Sangeet]

She can't decide what for herself?? She doesn't know whether what she is doing is ok according to gurmat so she is asking... Please think before posting

screw the discussion im disgusted by the forums admin who apparently hold a pro Sri Raagmala stance, to allow fools with guest i.d's such as this fools.

As for the discussion, IMHO penji what you have proposed would be fine. At the end of the day, it is a wedding and not a funeral. Family who arent exactly gurmukhs will want to have a laugh and good time. You have done the Gurmat thing by not allowing meat, sharab or dirty songs. Most people on this forum come from hardcore amritdhari families, or are too immature to understand your situation, because the world doesnt work like they way they imagine it does in their lala land...

Nice to know Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's Khalsa is in lala land for you and is to hardcore. When Guru Nanak Dev ji came onto this earth. What was happening. The Hindus were having a blast burning women alive. Muslims were having a a blast stoning women. Is your method to have fun any better. Wanting a party or going to one shows that the person is weak. They can't see the raas coming from Gurbani. So what does this poor human do, he/she try's to find excitment in the going to parties and having a good time. Right!!!! Does that sound like reality to you. Going the to the Gurdwara and have Guru Sahib darshan is a ritual for this person. They bow out of formalty.

You want to become a Khalsa then follow Gurmat otherwise there are many other ways that claim you can find God.

The same people claim I read this much Bani, I do this much bhagti. All rituals. Then they whine, how come Guru Sahib didn't bless me with his darshan. And finally step from these moorakhs is telling everyone that you can't reach the highest state. The state I have reached is it. There is nothing above this. Then comes the excuse. We are humans God made us to be humans it's natural to live in in lust, anger, ego, attachment, greed. Why else would he make it. All just stones waiting to sink on that day.

Not everyone is like the way you are describing. You may have the privilege of coming from an Amritdhari family... but others aren’t as fortunate. Keeping the peace is also important amongst a household, especially if it’s a Punjabi household. So i take it by your example if someone is watching football and their team wins, it’s wrong to jump up in excitement or even cheer because that is a weakness and is therefore antigurmat. I suppose football, watching TV, playing the piano, drawing/art etc is also anti Gurmat.

Brother/Sister, your point of view is exactly that of Islamic separatism, where if Sikhs stopped anything which hasn’t got anything to do with a religious connotation it becomes taboo. This kind of reminds me of sharia'ism in Islam becoming parallel in Sikhi.

Gurmat is not excluding yourself from family, or hurting the sentiments of others, Gurmat is not about separating yourself from society otherwise we all might as well take sanyaas.

So in conclusion... anyone who attends a party or allows one to be held in order to keep the peace, is a "bad" person. They have committed the ultimate sin... their sin is greater than nindiya...

Brother/Sister grow up (I’m guessing your still a teenager or a very naive individual) and come into the real world... by your example when your working at executive levels in society attending parties, social events etc. is antigurmat.

The true gurmukh is he who despite being exposed to the lusts of the world, still keeps his faith strong, isnt swayed or hindered. And in order to do that, one must experience the entire world. Otherwise sanyasism wouldn’t have been condemned by Satguru Nanak.

[Only five]

She can't decide what for herself?? She doesn't know whether what she is doing is ok according to gurmat so she is asking... Please think before posting

screw the discussion im disgusted by the forums admin who apparently hold a pro Sri Raagmala stance, to allow fools with guest i.d's such as this fools.

As for the discussion, IMHO penji what you have proposed would be fine. At the end of the day, it is a wedding and not a funeral. Family who arent exactly gurmukhs will want to have a laugh and good time. You have done the Gurmat thing by not allowing meat, sharab or dirty songs. Most people on this forum come from hardcore amritdhari families, or are too immature to understand your situation, because the world doesnt work like they way they imagine it does in their lala land...

Nice to know Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji's Khalsa is in lala land for you and is to hardcore. When Guru Nanak Dev ji came onto this earth. What was happening. The Hindus were having a blast burning women alive. Muslims were having a a blast stoning women. Is your method to have fun any better. Wanting a party or going to one shows that the person is weak. They can't see the raas coming from Gurbani. So what does this poor human do, he/she try's to find excitment in the going to parties and having a good time. Right!!!! Does that sound like reality to you. Going the to the Gurdwara and have Guru Sahib darshan is a ritual for this person. They bow out of formalty.

You want to become a Khalsa then follow Gurmat otherwise there are many other ways that claim you can find God.

The same people claim I read this much Bani, I do this much bhagti. All rituals. Then they whine, how come Guru Sahib didn't bless me with his darshan. And finally step from these moorakhs is telling everyone that you can't reach the highest state. The state I have reached is it. There is nothing above this. Then comes the excuse. We are humans God made us to be humans it's natural to live in in lust, anger, ego, attachment, greed. Why else would he make it. All just stones waiting to sink on that day.

Not everyone is like the way you are describing.

Who said they were all like I described, but I know the type. They like to attend parties, go out clubing, do that whole western lifestyle and then still expect Guru Sahib Darshan. It's called duality and the filth sticks too them.

You may have the privilege of coming from an Amritdhari family... but others aren't as fortunate.

Wasn't born in a Amritdhari family. But that doesn't matter. Either way parties like the ones these punjabis have is not gurmat. Having a get together and just socialize is whatever.

Keeping the peace is also important amongst a household, especially if it's a Punjabi household.

If you want peace as described by Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji then having a party will drive you away from peace. Don't bring these lame excuses up, been there and know how this 'peace' works.

So i take it by your example if someone is watching football and their team wins, it's wrong to jump up in excitement or even cheer because that is a weakness and is therefore antigurmat.

Great example, but you just missed the point. Why would you cheer. Sikhs are suppose to be in Chardikala 24/7 by repeating the Lord's name. Why don't you cheer everytime you say Waheguru. Doesn't saying Waheguru bring excitment to your life. Again you cheer because that peace isn't there and pleasure and pain is not seen as one. if one is repeating Waheguru 24/7 they are always in excitment, there mind dances with Waheguru.

I suppose football, watching TV, playing the piano, drawing/art etc is also anti Gurmat.

Playing football as a sport is a great work out, but being the couch patotoe, you must have better thing to do. Well when a Sikh falls in love with Waheguru, then in his/her spare time it's all about Waheguru. More Seva, more simran, more honest work. I know sounds boring to the average person, but walk in that Gursikhs shoes and you'll be able to see true excitment.

Brother/Sister, your point of view is exactly that of Islamic separatism, where if Sikhs stopped anything which hasn't got anything to do with a religious connotation it becomes taboo. This kind of reminds me of sharia'ism in Islam becoming parallel in Sikhi.

It's brother,Come on, now you shoud have said Taliban. That would have been more accurate. I could easily turn this around and call you a hippie. Well a more advanced hippie. I can't show a blind man the light.

Gurmat is not excluding yourself from family,

Who is your family, the Khalsa Panth, or stones that live in duality. If family is doing wrong then speak up. God gave you a tongue. It wasn't given to gossip and slander the pure path.

or hurting the sentiments of others,

Let Christians walk into Darbar Sahib with shoes on and not covering there heads. We don't want to hurt their sentiments. In Church they don't cover thier head so let them do the same. Have you heard of the Kaaba sakhi, where Guru Nanak Dev ji slepted with his feet toward the Kaaba. These party sentiments i will never respect. Read Gurbani on idol worship, by Dhan Dhan Dhan Guru Nanak Dev ji. Then come back and speak about sentiments. Is Guru Sahib more important in your life or following stones. You make the choice and will live with it.

Gurmat is not about separating yourself from society otherwise we all might as well take sanyaas.

Whoever said anything about separating from society. Read the shabads on keeping Chardikala sangat around. The type of sangat you 'chill' with is the one you turn into.

So in conclusion... anyone who attends a party or allows one to be held in order to keep the peace, is a "bad" person.

Keeping peace, who said your keeping peace. Do you know what peace even means. Here is your peace in it's true light. When Guru Nanak Dev ji said no more caste. Why did he break the peace. When Guru Gobind Singh Sahib ji stood up to the Mughal army. Didn't they know if they had just kept quiet more lives would have been saved. All those people dying, just live in oppression and live in illusions. Save your voilin for the ones that will fall for it.

Brother/Sister grow up (I'm guessing your still a teenager or a very naive individual) and come into the real world... by your example when your working at executive levels in society attending parties, social events etc. is antigurmat.

Do they drag you by the ear and make you attend. A person has a choice in life. Either follow Guru Sahib and SEE REALITY or jump in your box(yes the real world box) and dance to duality.

The true gurmukh is he who despite being exposed to the lusts of the world, still keeps his faith strong, isnt swayed or hindered. And in order to do that, one must experience the entire world. Otherwise sanyasism wouldn't have been condemned by Satguru Nanak.

Now the voilin is getting stronger. After responding to your post I had fun, well not really fun just shaking my head in how twisted you have it.. Bring one shabad that tells you to go directly into the maya of the world. Shabad Guru tells us to stay away from such things and you want to dip right into it. Thats fine with me if you want to stick yourself in, but don't make it seem as a Sikhi teaching. Khalsa lives in this world. You want to experience the entire world then experience bowing to an idol, experience how it feels to oppress others, experience by living in every single evil deed. The five evils are very much part of the world so experience the entire world in them and recieve your gift. Doing herion and acid is a experience of the world, should we all go buy some. Don't forget your needles guys. OOOOO and a lighter. Sorry your voilin broke.

Stay in Chardikala and keep away from bad sangat.

PRAY FOR THE KHALSA PANTH!!!!!!!!!