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Caste Problem In Love Marriage


84Singhni
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I know this boy for the past 2 years of my life. We became so close & then 7 months ago he asked me out. I didnt say yes to him straight, I made him wait.

Then, I said yes to him, because I thought he is a good boy & caring & is in SIKHI.

Then, we had sex. (Wasn't on purpose! Just happened, ME & HIM relised WE have made a big mistake!)

We became serious in out LOVE relationship & want to get married.

Now, he asked his mom if he is aloud to get married to a girl not in the same caste as him. 'JATT'

His mom goes NO!

He then didn't tell me. He goes its hard for him to break up all a sudden.

I don't want to break up with him because I LOVE HIM ALOT & I want to stay with who I had sex with.

We haven't broke up yet, we want to wait for a solution!

I don't know what to do now.

Please, help me as your sister.

ASAP!!

WJKK WJKF JI

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Guest guest5

You do know that s*x before marriage is a Bujjar Kurehit? If you are amritdhari you need to go peshi and you both need to tell your parents you had s*x with each other. No way will his mum say no then, you both went too far in your relationship and should get married now.

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Guest Truth Seeker

Yes you shouldn't have had relations that serious before marriage as we all know things can go wrong at the last minute and also sex before marriage is not a good thing.

But whats done is done, pray for forgiveness and you will be forgiven. But I would suggest you fight for your marriage, you love each other and alot of kids have to negotiate with their parents over these issues. Tell your parents the Gurus did not believe in the caste system and that they are acting contrary to gods teachings.

If they don't listen then either run away or get married anyway. Not fighting for this is being cowardly, god has obviously put you to in a position to educate your families on this issue, a great lesson could be learned by them from this all, you would be doing gods seva.

Caste and creed does not matter to god, we are all equally His children in His eyes, we would all do very well to not only marry out of caste but out of culture aswell becuase this bullsh*t of judging and segregating people by their image needs to end. Sikhi is not a religion, Guru Nanak Dev Ji gave the world the gift of Truth just as Jesus and Buddha did. These God realised beings kick started the evolution of people everywhere into Sants, Brahmgyanis, Bhagats and Gurus, they lit up the world with their very presence and their students followed suit in attaining Enlightenment.

So people let us disperse, spread the light of Truth and educate our brothers and sisters instead of isolating them and falling into the devils plan of segregation.

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Guest Truth seeker

Ask for forgiveness and you'll be forgiven.

Either fight to marry this boy as his parents are going against gods teachings and truth by creating boundaries between races when really we are all the same. If they don't agree, get married anyway or run away. God is obviously giving you a seva to educate your boyfriends family with the Truth.

We would all do well to marry out of race and caste so we can help to end the bullsh*t segregation that society and the devil have created.

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Just remember one thing both of u should have to marry with each other and no one else as u to both had committed a sin now u can't marry anyone else.......so do ardaas for forgiveness and for u'r marriage. Educate his family and if they don't agree say u'r boyfriend that not being a coward we should marry with each other <edited: lets not give the wrong advice>...........

BEST OF LUCK!

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Guest guest5
If they don't listen then either run away or get married anyway.

No, they shouldn't run away and get married. Parents are much more important because they have done so much for us. I'm sure their parents would allow them to get married anyway if they found out they slept with each other. If they still don't accept the marriage after fighting for it, then they just have to accept it.

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Guest Truth seeker

^^^Choosing your parents is putting them before god. If your parents cannot accept on the grounds of caste then they are not on gods side (the side of Truth which is Him.)

Every single thing that happens to us has a reason. There is no such thing as coincidence, he watches us always. It seems he wants you to speak the truth now, educating confused and prejudiced souls is the least you can do as seva now after engaging in relations before marriage.

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Guest guest5

^^^Choosing your parents is putting them before god. If your parents cannot accept on the grounds of caste then they are not on gods side (the side of Truth which is Him.)

Every single thing that happens to us has a reason. There is no such thing as coincidence, he watches us always. It seems he wants you to speak the truth now, educating confused and prejudiced souls is the least you can do as seva now after engaging in relations before marriage.

Then they are also putting their emotional attachment and kaam before God if they choose to run away. They need to fight for the marriage but if their parents still don't accept it, then they would have to accept it too. They wouldn't be going against God if they listen to their parents because they still wouldn't believe in caste. It's a bigger sin to betray your parents and to hurt them. It's not their parents fault, its theirs for even having a bf/gf relationship before marriage which is against gurmat.

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