Marriage - The Process Of Having Kids

[Guest Really]

''Secondly, I thought that within marriage the only time for intercourse was for procreation purposes, any other sexual interaction would involve kaam- it always does''

Really? So having regular intercourse with your wife after marriage is forbidden? Isnt the kaam aspect applicable to sexual relations outside of marriage?

[Guest Singhni]

''Secondly, I thought that within marriage the only time for intercourse was for procreation purposes, any other sexual interaction would involve kaam- it always does''

I would just like to know why there can be no regular sexual activity between an amritdhari couple after marriage? Sex just to have kids? Really! Surely the kaam explanation applies to extra-marital sex?

Because of the reason I just said - every sexual activity would necessarily involved lust. That's what Sikhs must avoid, right?

What do you mean? Kaam is kaam, whether it's within marriage or outside of marriage. It's one of the panj chor either way, so it applies to both situations. However, this is my logic, someone REALLY needs to tell me at some point what the majority of amritdhari couples actually do/ think about this. Because I'm in the dark about it.

[Only five]

Because of the reason I just said - every sexual activity would necessarily involved lust. That's what Sikhs must avoid, right?

What do you mean? Kaam is kaam, whether it's within marriage or outside of marriage. It's one of the panj chor either way, so it applies to both situations. However, this is my logic, someone REALLY needs to tell me at some point what the majority of amritdhari couples actually do/ think about this. Because I'm in the dark about it.

What Amritdhari couples do should not concern you because you're not married yet (they are all on different levels and will give you different opinions). When you get married then ask the Singh you get married too, what he thinks is proper (if you get married to a Singh with a lower jeevan then the opinion will differ between you and him). You are right kaam in or out of marriage is going to destroy the jeevan. But talking about these things does increase kaam and distracts a person from the main goal of Sikhi; developing a deeper pyare for Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj.

We all act like 5 year olds, controlled by our mind. So if you give our mind the thought of kaam it will no doubt get affected. If you give the mind something more powerful, where you don't even mention kaam, then the mind forgets about kaam and will grap hold of the more powerful thing. Mom's always play this game with their young children when their kid wants something that will hurt their health. Satguru does the same. Makes us aware of kaam, but then gives us his pyare, where we just focus on the virtues.

If you're looking for someone to confirm your opinion, then you are right according to Sri Sukhmani Sahib da paat.

[Only five]

I would just like to know why there can be no regular sexual activity between an amritdhari couple after marriage?

Because the Gursikh couple have gotten their spirituality to such a high level where such worldly very low acts just don't express any form of pyare. The thought of it takes them far away from Sri Vaheguru ji Maharaj and it's being in the worst pain in the world when being far from Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj. For them the real pyare has taken over where they meditate on Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj all day long, while working, talking, eating, taking care of their children, etc (as Gurbani instructs us). Their true beloved is Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj.

Sex just to have kids? Really! Surely the kaam explanation applies to extra-marital sex?

Having children takes place in Gursikh couples because we (SIkhs) are told by Satguru to live an householder lifestyle. Because of this hukam Gursikhs fillfull this duty. Otherwise there is no desire or interest.

Rather than going on someone else words, it's best to follow Sikhi, where we recognize these things ourselves and then the understanding becomes clear as day and becomes rational and logical.

[Guest Guest]

What exactly is Lust ?

[chatanga]

Because of the reason I just said - every sexual activity would necessarily involved lust. That's what Sikhs must avoid, right?

Sikhs should control Kaam and the other 4 theives, not be controlled by it. Avoiding it is a different matter.

[innergear]

I'm confuzd . Talkin iz bit weird ? Do't u jst git on wit it . Turn lyts out 1st doh Yeh ?

[Guest anon]

I'm confuzd . Talkin iz bit weird ? Do't u jst git on wit it . Turn lyts out 1st doh Yeh ?

Do you need help with your grammar ? or are you just fail trollin

[Guest Someone]

So if we are trying to get rid of kaam etc and need to avoid it as much as possible in order to reach this high stage in our jeevans.. Say the couple have been controlling and not taking part in sexual acts.. When it then comes to the time of trying for children then wouldn't that be hard? Because that act involves lust.. I mean it can't really happen without lust right? So then what happens? Would all of that controlling have gone down the drain?

[Wingz23]

Nobody can answer your question. This is not an appropriate question to discuss in public. When you get married, you can speak to your partner about such matters. Don't even know why this topic was allowed, to be honest.

okay first of all, theres no need 2 b rude.. the singhni is just asking... there are so many posts of the forum about mastubation, affairs, love!! the singhini asked if she could get some answers and thought not whether or not it was okay to talk about it... if it wasnt okay it would have been blocked or rejected... people come on this forum to have help not be moaned at.