Help! Pre Marital Sex

[Guest moorakh]

please help. my girlfriend and i had been together for a while now, and we both decided to have pre marital sex. but she is not pregnant. her sister found out and has ended our relationship. her sister has disowned her and lost all trust in her. we are both so lost. she doesnt know what to do with her life now as this is the worst outcome. we were just caught up in the lust and didnt think about the consequences, but we both wanted it. she is feeling so lost and empty. and so am i. i dont feel like eating, i shiver constantly, i just want to sleep and hate being awake as i have to carry this on my shoulders. i cannot even look into my own eyes in the mirror. marriage between us will not happen at all because of the family belief in castes. i dont know what to do, i feel so guilty that i ruined her life. we both know that there is no rewind button but what can we do now? what should we do? please help. just feel so lost and empty. she is in a much worse position than i am, but the guilt is painful. what can we do? i started listening to nitnem again and kirtan shabads.

[Mehtab Singh]

Please read this: http://www.sikhsanga...post__p__518894

By the way, how old are you both?

[scooter]

what you really want now. I mean you want to find some way to marry her or you want to apologise for sex with her. From practicality there is nothing you can do now if u think that u can't marry her. If you are really serious about confessing and have courage , then you can confess that to your family members and friends or in group of people so that you feel the guilt

[Guest newbie]

You have to marry her regardless of all this caste nonsense. Stand up and grow a backbone, and get a grip on the situation.

[KARKOOSINGH23]

there r no castes in sikhi r u sure ur a sikh

[Guest waronfalsehood]

Sikhi doesn#t believe in caste, so you either marry the girl(which of course you should) or follow your parents who are disrespecting the Guru by believing in castes(In ego).

[sachasoormaa]

You need to chop off your genitals

No but seriously life goes on. You made a big mistake and there's no point to keep on thinking about it. Better your self as an indivdual

[Guest unnamed]

With all due regards you did not ask in a forum if you should have sex with her or not ????

Then why know ?

Grow up , be a man - Stand for what you did n marry her.

There is nothing like a caste in Sikhism- we all have same lastnames Singh for guys n Kaur for girls. Live upto your name 'Singh'.

You have another option - Be the <banned word filter activated> and just go n ditch !!

But dont ask in a forum if you should marry her or not - ask yourself if you should or not. Can you live with the burden after cheating her, if not you know what to do.

[luckysingh99]

You knew it was wrong in the first place. You both got carried away with desire,you both lost control and dignity. For this both of you should feel the same guilt, but it should only be a problem between you both. Why the hell is her sister interfering ?? Does she have grounds to believe you are no good and you put her sister up to it ???

This is what you need to answer, if you lead her to it then you should blame yourself for manipulating her mind and body- and you should get up and apologise to her. If you love her, then you should let her sister know and apologise to her as well. All you have to say is that you are sorry she feels that way about you and then explain yourself.

Only marry her if you want to, not cuz someone says.

AND finally, control that thing between your legs, don't let it do the thinking- use your brain to think not your d***

As a sikh you should have had more control. A sikhs toughest goal is to have full control over MIND, you didn't even get that far and let your d*** take over !!!

BTW. I dated many girls before I settled, but I always kept my hands where they belong, and therefore do not have any guilt whatsoever.

[VanHelsingh]

Hey, at least you have a conscience and you feel partly responsible for what happened. That's the first step towards....well, I don't know --- redemption?