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Guest singh

Depressed And Ashamed

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Guest singh

To cut a long story short,

I have been unemployed for the last 4 years this was due to a social anxiety problem I had. Now i just feel lost.

due to the problem i missed out on the career path i wanted to go into. and now because of the anxiety problem. my life has been left ruined. ie job prospects ect. my life has just completely turned upside down. and ive gone so far behind and missed out on so much on life. ie having a stable job, success in educational and career path. no gf or friends. Just missed out on all the normal things people take for granted in life. And to top it off. i feel ive let everyone down and im ashamed that ive not achieved or done anything. now i just feel so depressed and demoralized that i just couldn’t bare working in some low down dead end job. i feel i had so much potential but it all went to waste. i just feel so unfulfilled in everywhere single way. All motivation and ambition has just deserted me. Ive gone so behind. I feel like a failure in life. A life that has just been wasted.

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Is the anxiety problem sorted? If not, you know what you need to do.

Best not to overwhelm yourself with thoughts of what could've been. Can't change the past, you know that. You can affect the future though. It isn't over until the fat lady sings - there's 80 year old men and women doing degrees. Don't give up. I know exactly what you're experiencing.

I won't turn all 'Jehova's Witness' and start telling you to begin praying, but our faith (Sikhi) helped me and gave my life some structure and some discipline at a time when I had nothing. If that is something that at all interests you it's an option you could explore.

Other than that keep your head up. Trust me, others have it a lot worse and they really do. Everytime I was told this little gem it would anger me so much but it's true. I presume you live in a Western country? You've a roof over your head, 3 square meals, a relative amount of freedom? These are things to be cherished.

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_singh_ji..... you are in a cycle at the moment that is undoubtedly having a snowball effect. The only way to get out of it is to just make up your mind to attempt something and stick to it.

Its hard, but just try not think about the past and get back up on the horse and give it another go. If the normal full-time student gig doesn't suit you, then you could always think of a different way of studying, ie an apprenticeship in a trade or part-time/night college (assuming that studies/upskilling is what you wanted to do).

You may be plagued with doubts about life Singh saheb, but just know that the world is your oyster:- and there is no doubt about THAT.

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You have lost nothing and gained nothing. You are as Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj wanted you to be. If you want to look at them as mistakes, then everyone makes mistakes only Guru Sahib and Sri Vaheguru ji Maharaj are above making mistakes.

One thing you should do is start reading Gurbani in the language you understand what Guru Sahib is saying to you. By reading Gurbani, you will get a better understanding of what is asked from you. Do not look into the past and think you have lost the opportunity for things. I was just reading Gurbani, where Guru Sahib said that having in the world is not the object of life. The object of life is to find love that is in us for Sri Vaheguru Ji Maharaj. Searching on the outside you will not find what you are looking for and will not be able to find the happiness you are looking for. Search within by reading Gurbani and following Gurbani instructions. The mind is freed from all anxieties by reading Gurbani with concentration.

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dear brother sister. Like all the above quotes. Falling down is not failing. Not getting back up is failing. If Waheguru and help and ex class druggie like me, Waheguru can most certainly help you as well. The only thing I cay advise is to never give up keep going forward. If one door closes, don't keep staring at the one closed door because you may miss out on the doors which opened.

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You already have been given good advice in above posts so i wont repeat. I will leave you with few quotes from the movie I watched last night

"The only real faliure is the failure to try"

"The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing"

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Khalsa Ji

In addition to the above posts please note that if you start the day with Gurbani Nitnem you will experience a reversal of fortune , i.e. you will get the job you're looking for , the status , and everything else.

The proof:

ਪੰਨਾ 638, ਸਤਰ 2

ਅਚਿੰਤ ਕੰਮ ਕਰਹਿ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਤਿਨ ਕੇ ਜਿਨ ਹਰਿ ਕਾ ਨਾਮੁ ਪਿਆਰਾ ॥

Acẖinṯ kamm karahi parabẖ ṯin ke jin har kā nām pi▫ārā.

God automatically does the work of those who love the Name of the Lord.

ਮਃ 3

Waheguru.

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waheguru ji......realization is the solution........start now.........it;s in your hands to turns things the way you need them......

read this interesting self help book.......answers all of your questions....I know in my personal acquaintances, it has changed many peoples life, some thinking of suicide are ahead of us today........in every path of life, job, house, family, spirituality, you name it and they have it,,,,in very short time........

The-Power-of-Your-Subconscious-Mind-by-Joseph-Murphy-SMSE-2010.pdf

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To cut a long story short,

I have been unemployed for the last 4 years this was due to a social anxiety problem I had. Now i just feel lost.

due to the problem i missed out on the career path i wanted to go into. and now because of the anxiety problem. my life has been left ruined. ie job prospects ect. my life has just completely turned upside down. and ive gone so far behind and missed out on so much on life. ie having a stable job, success in educational and career path. no gf or friends. Just missed out on all the normal things people take for granted in life. And to top it off. i feel ive let everyone down and im ashamed that ive not achieved or done anything. now i just feel so depressed and demoralized that i just couldn’t bare working in some low down dead end job. i feel i had so much potential but it all went to waste. i just feel so unfulfilled in everywhere single way. All motivation and ambition has just deserted me. Ive gone so behind. I feel like a failure in life. A life that has just been wasted.

im going thu the same thing right now... i have no maney no anything.. life isnt too good from where i am either.

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The only reason for a job is to earn so you can sustain yourself and your family, and so you can give to others. You only need a job which can achieve that.

Our REAL true potential is not gonna be unlocked through a job or any worldly activity. Our real true potential will be unlocked by following the path of Gurmat, of trying to find Vaheguru. Take up the real challenge, the job which will give you the greatest reward.

So smile! As long as you can do naam simran and recite/hear Gurbani, nothing has been lost. In fact as a Sikh you have Guru Sahib so you have everything! Remember, the spark of Vaheguru is within you!

ਆਸਾ ਮਹਲਾ ੫ ॥

Aasaa Mehalaa 5 ||

Aasaa, Fifth Mehl:

ਭਈ ਪਰਾਪਤਿ ਮਾਨੁਖ ਦੇਹੁਰੀਆ ॥

Bhee Paraapath Maanukh Dhaehureeaa ||

This human body has been given to you.

ਗੋਬਿੰਦ ਮਿਲਣ ਕੀ ਇਹ ਤੇਰੀ ਬਰੀਆ ॥

Gobindh Milan Kee Eih Thaeree Bareeaa ||

This is your chance to meet the Lord of the Universe.

ਅਵਰਿ ਕਾਜ ਤੇਰੈ ਕਿਤੈ ਨ ਕਾਮ ॥

Avar Kaaj Thaerai Kithai N Kaam ||

Nothing else will work.

ਮਿਲੁ ਸਾਧਸੰਗਤਿ ਭਜੁ ਕੇਵਲ ਨਾਮ ॥੧॥

Mil Saadhhasangath Bhaj Kaeval Naam ||1||

Join the Saadh Sangat, the Company of the Holy; vibrate and meditate on the Jewel of the Naam. ||1||

ਸਰੰਜਾਮਿ ਲਾਗੁ ਭਵਜਲ ਤਰਨ ਕੈ ॥

Saranjaam Laag Bhavajal Tharan Kai ||

Make every effort to cross over this terrifying world-ocean.

ਜਨਮੁ ਬ੍ਰਿਥਾ ਜਾਤ ਰੰਗਿ ਮਾਇਆ ਕੈ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

Janam Brithhaa Jaath Rang Maaeiaa Kai ||1|| Rehaao ||

You are squandering this life uselessly in the love of Maya. ||1||Pause||

ਜਪੁ ਤਪੁ ਸੰਜਮੁ ਧਰਮੁ ਨ ਕਮਾਇਆ ॥

Jap Thap Sanjam Dhharam N Kamaaeiaa ||

I have not practiced meditation, self-discipline, self-restraint or righteous living.

ਸੇਵਾ ਸਾਧ ਨ ਜਾਨਿਆ ਹਰਿ ਰਾਇਆ ॥

Saevaa Saadhh N Jaaniaa Har Raaeiaa ||

I have not served the Holy; I have not acknowledged the Lord, my King.

ਕਹੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਹਮ ਨੀਚ ਕਰੰਮਾ ॥

Kahu Naanak Ham Neech Karanmaa ||

Says Nanak, my actions are contemptible!

ਸਰਣਿ ਪਰੇ ਕੀ ਰਾਖਹੁ ਸਰਮਾ ॥੨॥੪॥

Saran Parae Kee Raakhahu Saramaa ||2||4||

O Lord, I seek Your Sanctuary; please, preserve my honor! ||2||4||

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man, i was in basically the exact same situation, dropped out of college, broke up with my gf, lost some friends, had some major family problems, crappy job and some other things that I don't want to mention. All of this was due to my anxiety but one day I just woke up and broke out of the cycle of depression. First thing you should do is go to a doctor and get some anxiety medication, I recommended propranolol 20 mg, it will kill your anxiety, your heart won't race like crazy and you'll be able to think clearly and calmly and that dreaded feeling of panic will basically be eliminated. Next, the sky is the limit, life is long, people change careers, people break up during relationships, so you still have time for everything!!!

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as Aaliyah (rip) said :

If at first you don't succeed

Dust yourself off and try it again

You can dust it off and try again

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I would say do your Nitnem if you are not already, keep going to the gurdwara and doing Naam Jaap for at least 5 mins a day to build up a good sort of spiritual shield everyday, otherwise these minor thoughts can creep in and basically drown you in themselves

You've got to get a boost everyday to keep you high and untouchable, so try that

as far as the job situation goes, I would say on a career level, can you do a course of some sort to boost your prospects? I know you haven't worked in a while and a course can be quick, but might cost a bit but still look into it, might be a quick way to get back into employment of some sort and looks good

I know lots of people suffer from anxiety so don't think its just uou, its practically everyone in some way or another. I would say 2 things, firstly listen to kirtan more or if you feel anxiety at anytime hum a tune to yourself to relax you, something you like, and is applicable. Secondly keep doing your naam simran and naam jaap and it could be that the mind needs cleaning from toxic emotions etc, so thats a long term approach, give it a try, let us know how you get on

I would just like to say, when we feel under pressure, dont worry so much, things can turn around very quickly when we start acting, dont look back so much, everyday set yourself a goal to acomplish and before you know you will have come so far it will be amazing

good luck

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man, i was in basically the exact same situation, dropped out of college, broke up with my gf, lost some friends, had some major family problems, crappy job and some other things that I don't want to mention. All of this was due to my anxiety but one day I just woke up and broke out of the cycle of depression. First thing you should do is go to a doctor and get some anxiety medication, I recommended propranolol 20 mg, it will kill your anxiety, your heart won't race like crazy and you'll be able to think clearly and calmly and that dreaded feeling of panic will basically be eliminated. Next, the sky is the limit, life is long, people change careers, people break up during relationships, so you still have time for everything!!!

did u ever try theraphy? cuz i remmember i was given anxiety pills n they were crap... but i still have to go back to the Drs.

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try sitting down and doing one mala (108 beads) or twenty minutes of mool mantar simran. if you need to, speak it out loud and listen with your ears. you don't have to rush it. slowly increase the amount of time you devote to mool mantr. when 10 percent of your day is given over to simran, and almost certainly before that, you *WILL* have peace of mind.

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