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Another Wedding Stopped!


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ooh i thought paaji said "bohot Vadhayeea"..

normally something u'd say when someone gets married.. not when a marriage is stopped..

anyways.. I laughed at my own non-existant joke..

and someones who's "abit of geeza".. means he's a bit laddish, keen,audacious... kinda thing

na man i sed bohot vadhya (very good) as in very good its stopped.

Pure jokes, brother. I would only have made the joke if it wasn't true. :biggrin2:

lol yea i kno :cool2:

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I understand that it is important to understand the laavan and have faith in Guru Granth Sahib ji if you want to take part in Anand Karaj, but I have a question. I know of Raagis in India who get poor couples married infront of Guru Maharaj in a ceremony where a large number of couples are married- I consider this as a huge seva as people who can't afford anything are getting married in proper ceremonies, would people want to go and stop these forcefully aswell as some of the couples may not be Sikh?

Secondly I also don't understand that if we consider the human race as one, why don't we teach the couples getting married what the Anand Karaj means so they understand what they are doing, this includes Sikhs instead of forcefully stopping these weddings. Shouldn't the Gurdwara committees check whose getting married when they book the ceremonies instead of stopping it in the last minute and giving a chance to the media and everyone else to class sikhs as extremists.

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@ hench - You're right. It is the failings of the various committees who have allowed these marriages to go ahead over the years that has led to this situation. Again, their greed rather than concern for doing what is right has overruled maryada.

As for your point regarding education in terms of the Anand Karaj I think we must be completely honest. Some people don't care about what the Anand Karaj signifies. For most it is a ritual that is part and parcel of a classic Sikh wedding celebration --- and I include marriages where the bride and groom are both from Sikh households.

The way to tackle this issue is that people in our community must get serious and really think through what the Sikh marriage ceremony is about. It must be elevated to, dare I say, an Amrit sanchar in terms of importance and respect. Like I've said before if we see the Anand Karaj as a precursor to the "fun and games" - thus something to get out of the way ASAP - then how on earth is a non-Sikh going to respect it?

These are my opinions of course, especially the bit about elevating the Anand Karaj to Amrit Sanchaar-status in terms of importance.

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All sham Anand Karaj's now being booked are done so for money. parbandhaks have to be living in hole, under a rock, in a cave if they don't know about the Maryada.. and if they don't, their not fit to be a parbandhak anyway.

Therefore, these sham Anand Karaj's are a defiance by greedy anti-gurmat committee's.

Hence pre-planning is not possible, these weddings will have to be cancelled last min..

4 weddings have been stopped over the last few week..

More are planned... those that work with the community to resolve will remain gupt.. the rest.. expect last min protests

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I don't see the stopping of Anand Karaj marriages at the last minute by locking the gates as something to celebrate.

To me I feel like we are shooting ourself in the foot and then congratulating ourself about it.

The couple, in every single case, will get married regardless. Therefore, the issue rests on two main things.

Firstly, what defines an ordinary Sikh (as opposed to what constitutes true Amritdhari GurSikh). The historical definition of an ordinary Sikh was any person who bows down before Dhan Dhan Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji Maharaj. That obviously does not match precisely with current Rehit Maryada. However, when the Akal Takht Jathedar awards the title Panth Rattan Fakr-e-Qaum to PS Badal (or when the Jathedar gave a siropa to General Dwyer of Jallianwala Bagh massacre fame) as opposed to Justice Khalra then we need to be very vigilant that the Akal Takht jathedars place SGGS Ji's definition of a Sikh first rather than the modern definition which seeks to limit the number of Sikhs and thereby constrain our collective power as an enlarged but United Panth. Therefore, if two people bow down in full sharda before SGGS Ji Maharaj (and only ParmAathma can know the true sharda within someone's heart) then to all intents and purposes they are both clearly Sikhs (the fraudsters can also be exposed by having to confirm that they condemn gender inequality as espoused in the Bible, Quran etc). I wholeheartedly agree with the general direction of Luton Gurdwara's approach on a couple showing commitment to Sikhi (in fact we could even the extend that approach by widening it to all couples and to our Qaum's positive advantage by way of getting all Punjabi folks to adopt Singh and Kaur as their surnames).

Secondly, given that in each case the couple are getting married anyway ... we need to work out if it is better for us to alienate and lose two people humble enough to bow down to SGGS Ji Maharaj or should we in fact strive to ensure that they understand the fundamental truths behind including Singh and Kaur in their names and make a commitment that their children will be named so as well.

Our Guru is fundamentally beyond Beadbi on a spiritual level. Of course, we ourselves as Sikhs should never deliberately commit Beadbi but to extend the definition of Beadbi to include the Laavan - arguably the happiest moment of these couple's lives - when clearly they are receiving blessings simply to be in the presence of SGGS Ji Maharaj is something I have serious doubts about.

We definitely need to be vigilant in applying serious vetting when it comes to male grooms of aggressively proselytising Abrahamic faiths but we need to encourage others to maintain and strengthen their links to Sikhi not for the sake of our opinions on Beadbi but for the sake of the children of such marriages feeling welcome within the Panth rather than ostracised away from Sikhi.

Make no mistake, so-called mixed marriages will double from the levels of 2012 within just this decade alone ... we need to decide what's the right approach for the future right now ... copying Christians, Muslims and Jews ... all religions which condone Slavery ... should not be the way ... as if we had taken the time to engage with the Swindon groom ... any person would logically conclude that Sikhi is the truth in comparison to one of the Abrahamic faiths which condone Slavery.

Our Dera enemies are loving the approach taken at Swindon. Because just like how they mop up sehajdhari's due to our kattar-dha they will be at the forefront of encouraging such marriages in an effort to discredit Sikhi. By ourselves complicitly + willingly limiting the number of future Sikhs, we have to be careful we don't inadvertently commit a bigger Beadbi against SGGS Ji Maharaj when it is a Universal message of Truth which needs a greater audience for Sarbat da Bhala. I also have respect for everyone who wishes to uphold Rehit Maryada but I think we need to seriously think outside of the box on this matter because mixed marriages will only double and treble in the coming years. Either we can de facto get smaller and smaller as a Panth and limit the definition of a Sikh to as small a minority as possible (like our enemies want to see us do) or we can try to widen the audience of Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji Maharaj for the sake of the greater good of the whole of humanity.

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Some good points about committees, one thing still unanswered is I wanted to know what about the marriages in India when many poor couples are married in one big ceremony, what about those who are not Sikhs in those couples, surely it is a very big seva of getting underprivileged couples married in proper ceremonies.

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