Strange Question...looking For Answers. (Serious)

[Guest Reveal]

I agree with other posters that you would benefit from seeking professional help from a psychologist via your GP if you can. What you have described sounds like you are experiencing intrusive thoughts (which are actually very common) but understandably can be disheartening given their intensity. Contrary to other posts, it would only be classed as OCD if you are having these thoughts prior to feeling like you need to undertake a certain action/job I.e. flicking the light switch a certain number of times or until it feels 'right'. Intrusive thoughts can occur without the compulsive part of OCD. Furthermore, CBT is helpful but is one of many therapies designed to overcome such problems and as long as you go in motivated to overcome this, with Maharaja's Kirpa you will undoubtedly succeed

But the fact that he is having intrusive thoughts non stop could actually be seen as a form of compulsion itself. He may be bringing up the thoughts (without knowing it) to know that he can have them and not act on them. (In a sense testing without actually knowing he is testing). This may or may not be the case. OCD can get very very complicated. However, the fact that he is apologising to God each time he is having them could be a compulsion in itself. A compulsion in OCD is not always something physical. My sister has OCD too and each time she has an intrusion, she does a certain number of mool mantras. Prayer is good but if you are doing it each time there is an intrusive thought or belief, you could actually be reinforcing the intrusive thoughts and guaranteeing that they come back. This sounds like a classic case of OCD to me.

[Guest Reveal]

Yes profesional help is needed.

to me it sound like schizoprania, especially because you wish for bad things to happen.

Schizopranics have thoughts where they wish to hurt themselves or others.

This does not sound like schizophrenia. For schizophrenia to be present, one would need to have a whole load of other things going on such as hearing voices, being deluded etc. It sounds like intrusive thoughts which have developed into an obsessive compulsive disorder problem.

[infromthevoid]

Set up an appointment with a therapist and see what they think. In the mean time, relax. There is no such "God" judging you or your thoughts. That is all in your mind. Accept yourself, be calm, let the thoughts run through and let them go. When you feel disturbed, take a little time to sit quietly, breath deeply and very slowly, and just listen to and focus on your breath.

[Super_Singhni]

I think it would be interesting to know more about the behaviour that you do/thought that you have after thinking these things about God as its not been clear in the original post. At the end of the day its not so much about being a given a diagnosis but about you recognising there is a way out. Good luck

[SunSingh]

sounds like you have some bad karams / habits that cause some rather nasty and intrusive thoughts. keep doing seva simran and satsangat and over time they will decrease. the key is, focus on bani, not on the bad thoughts. let the bad thoughts come and go as they please. if you try to suppress them they will likely increase. so ignore them and keep the focus on naam. thoughts in and of themselves do not have much power. over time they will decrease and even go away. it may help you to find some activity that requires disciplining the mind. for example, you may have noticed that such thoughts are much less during exam time. this is b/c studying is a tapasya and helps to purify the mind. attending sangat regularly is huge. asking for maafi for the thoughts is a good idea, however, don't stress over it b/c it truly is not in your hands. just keep making efforts and LIVE YOUR LIFE and over time they'll go away without you needing to worry about them.

[KhalistaniGunMan]

This is the best reply. You need to seek professional help. It's all very well saying recite bani etc. which is very good but sometimes you need to seek a trained professionals help. Like if someone had a heart attack would you recite bani or get a paramedic or doctor to resusitate the person. End of the day it is Wahegurus hukam but sometimes you need to do something yourself and seek extra help to get the desired result. Like you can't pass your uni exams or driving test without actually studying for it, you can't say well just do namm simran and I will pass as you wont.

i agree...we cannot forget everything is waheguru...sometimes wahegurus help comes in the form of a therapist or doctor...waheguru works in many ways

[Guest Vigillance]

I would like to thank you all for your help and advice. This has really been an eye opener for me. I've done some reading on intrusive thoughts, and it appears to be related with OCD...which I know for sure I have. I am a compulsive hand washer and I do lots of rituals to help keep my anxiety down.

I have another question. Sikhism says that rituals and superstitions are pointless, and do not bring us closer to God. So...Im thinking...Would that mean that Sikhism would frown apon me doing these OCD rituals I have? That could actually be a huge motivating factor for me to try and resist doing my rituals and learning to let my anxiety subside on its own.

Again, my main concern here is that my intrusive thoughts are upsetting God.

I am constantly worried that my intrusive thoughts will cause me to be punished, when I dont actually mean those thoughts at all. I find myself apologising as much as I can for these thoughts.

And as you all have said, I will try to find a therapist to help me deal with this.

I just want to know that if I let these intrusive thoughts happen and leave them alone, I wont be upsetting God.

[SunSingh]

you cannot upset God. Also, your rituals won't cause you to get punished. Try reading a long Bani like Sukhmani sahib, with proper pronounciation and a focus on the meanings. I tend to have a nervous disposition and things like this calm me down a great deal. Exercise will also help in dealing with your nervous energy which manifests itself as anxiety.