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Can't Pray


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From someone that used to wake up at amitvela every morning at 3am ,i have now become a person that sleeps through amritvela and does not pray at all. Even when i do have the chance to pray at amritvela, fully awake in bed , i choose to sleep instead. I don't know what's happened to me and saddens me to think , how strong i was in my rehit and now i have nothing. I don't know maybe i've done some wrong but i can't seem to get back up on the step of praying and am feeling depressed.

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I can only applaud you for waking up at 3am to do your nitnem. Not many people can do that myself included.

I've found when trying to break bad habits is to try and do it gradually? You could try waking up 15 mins earlier than you usually do for a few weeks, then slowly push that back to 30 mins earlier, etc. That might work. Also it depends if you REALLY want to do it, i.e. there's something inside you that is hungry to do nitnem and not sleep through. It'll take some time to get back to where you were, but at least you won't try to go from nothing to everything overnight.

Just my personal thoughts.

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