Immediate sollution to kaami thoughts/actions

[Mehtab Singh]

I would like to know the real answer to this question which is always left unanswered or for me to make up.

What is the big sin? what do i have to go pesh for?

1. to have a boyfriend.

2. OR pre-marital intercourse.

are they both completely forbidden or is having a boyfriend better than....

What i see is that sex is the worst thing. i mean where is it written that relationships are wrong.

So basically, you're expecting us to respond with what you have in mind already and makes you feel comfortable? Why you have to pesh? Well, give me a reason why not? If you don't want to, that is a different topic altogether. Where is it written relationships are wrong? Didn't your Panj Pyaare tell you that you're forbidden from any physically intimate relationship that is pre-marital or extra-marital in nature? Is having a boyfriend a sin, if you're an Amritdhari, and having a boyfriend for you is tantamount to having a physically intimate relationship, then YES it IS a sin, so is pre-marital intercourse.

[Guest op]

Sorry if I seemed arrogant, I do not want to seem arrogant I was just asking what the actualy kuret is. I mean I have had a boyfriend we did nothing rude, only hugs and kisses. So is that the kuret and do I have to go to re-take Amrit for that, or is the kuret to have sex. I mean could I come back on my tracks with ardas and sewa or do i have to re-take Amrit to be mukat. If I get convinced to go to the panjpyare do i mention music and stopping nitnem or tell them only the kaam bit. I was asking is it ok to have a relationship because some people have , and say that as long as you do not get up to anything wrong it is ok if it is purely love for one another.

[Mehtab Singh]

I'd still suggest going to Panj Pyaare.

[GyanParbodh]

We all know that a lot of Sikh youth (Amritdharis included) are having physical relationships right? even if it is 'undercover'

This idea that it is 'bad' it is a 'sin' obviously isn't a deterrent. It may make you feel guilty at first but that's about it. That feeling fades away to eventually.

Sex and relationships really need to be discussed. What is wrong with having a relationship? finding your own partner? Having sex? What makes sex wrong outside marriage but ok inside? Why is it worse for a girl to be involved in such stuff but not as bad for a guy?

[zaz]

Kaam or sexual drive is on top of the list given by Guru ji . kaam, krodh, lobh, moha and ahankar. These are five vices and inward foes of humans. We are here to keep them under control by the help and grace of Guru ji. kaam is to be only used between married couples. Mistakes do happen and Wheguru knows and can forgive if one fully repents and turn to him with full purpose of heart.

[S4NGH]

/\ /\ /\ Sorry Ji

Ok seriously to the OP stop listening to the songs you listen to. At the Gurdwara dont look at the Singhs in that way, Maharaj is right in front of you and is watching, well Maharaj knows what you're thinking anyway. Stop seeing your boyfriend and this will sound harsh but stop being friends because thats where you're going wrong.

If you truly want to change (dont lie to yourself, sometimes people really dont want to change themselves) do Ardas and Maharaj will definitely help you

Oh and dont be too hard on yourself...you've got Bieber Fever.

Lmao bieber fever! His tunes are really catchy

[savinderpalsingh]

Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa !!

Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh !!

when ever i get these thoughts , i remember i am wearing a kachera and what it stands for . and those thoughts stop immediately

[luckysingh99]

Look penji,

I don't know what the real problem is ??

Are you asking for permission to get active with your boyfirend, or are you asking is it ok to be in love ??

There is nothing wrong with finding the one you marry via a non-arranged means.

However, sexual relations outside marriage are a NO, NO in most faiths. I know that there are some randy singhs that claim it is ok to do kaam as long as the partner is not someone's wife, -because gurban specifally instructs not to have relations with anothers wife.

But this does not mean to openly have relations with an unmarried partner does it ???

If you actually feel real love for your boyfriend, then you would not have kaam feelings towards others you see. You would not be eyeing up other singhs at the gurdwara.

Therfore, seeing as your kissy wissy relationship is not going to lead to marriage, you should finish it before you bothe end up putting something in the oven !!

Do your simran, paath and ask waheguru ji for strength.

Respect Bieber for his music and don't look at him as a sex god or figure !

Anyway, I suppose we would rather have a singhni with a boyfriend than a lesbian girlfriend !!

[GurujisDaughter]

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa
Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

Penji, its just that you did get a blessing of Amrit, but then you lost path. Guru Sahib forgives us. He loves us alot and want us to be more close to them. Its good that you have now realized that something wrong is going on. And Guru Sahib has given you this understanding! Now its just the time to correct the things and ask for forgiveness to our True Father.

Boyfriends are wrong. Guru Gobind Singh Ji's daughter would never do kisses or hugs or whatever with an opposite gender. She walks gracefully with respect. I understand you love that guy, but it's not the wise thing to do at this age, at this time. Having relationships onlly takes immense amount of time away from you Guru which you could have used to elevate yourself and do more naam simran! He is Amritdhari too, let him focus on himself and let him grow spiritually too! There is a beautiful article I read about wordly love and True Love http://gurmatbibek.com/forum/read.php?3,7115,7151%C2'>

And i know you are going off and on, but you have to stop listening to songs and movies!

iqRXw rwg sunih icq lwie ] sunhu lwl so jmpuir jwie ]17]
thriyaa raag sunehi chith laae || sunahu laal so jamapur jaae ||17||
Those who listen to dirty lyrics and lustful tunes with attention, listen Nand Lal Jee, they will be punished by the angel of death.;

Rehatnama Bhai Nand Laal Jee

myry mohn sRvnI ieh n sunwey ] swkq gIq nwd Duin gwvq bolq bol Ajwey ]1] rhwau ]
maerae mohan sravanee eih n sunaaeae || saakath geeth naadh dhhun gaavath bolath bol ajaaeae ||1|| rehaao ||
O my fascinating Lord, may I never listen to the faithless cynic, singing his songs and tunes, and chanting his useless words. ||1||Pause||



....Only Guru Sahib knows how many boyfriends and husbands we have already had in past life forms, let this life be filled with unconditional love only for Waheguru.... and this is how it is supposed to be anyways

[tuhintuhin]

OP

Read and listen to Chotte sahibzaadeaan's shaheedi saka,,,,,,,again and again

so when wrong feelings come to your mind....your innerself will feel ashamed automatically........and think what you are doing...and do ardas to get rid of these feelings.....

Start reading Guru's ji's jeewan and then mahapurkh's jeewans......... best source to connect with Guru ji,,,,,,,