Sex before marriage

[Guest Cnfused]

Really Sorry for engine this topic up!

I am 17 years old. I took amrit at the age of 12 because I felt very connected with the guru at the time and i knew and I still know that the main objective in this life is to become jot Vich jot with waheguru, and the first step to doing so is Amrit for a Sikh, that's why I took it at an early age because I felt like I didn't want to waste my time as we don't know we are gonna die, anyway..it was going well till I was about 14/15, at 14/15 puberty hit and I felt more prone to 5 evils, I got involved with the wrong crowd, and The effect of this was I stopped doing my nitnem and Simran and alot of things...I pretty much gave up being an Amrit dhari for a while and then this girl came into the picture... loads of guys liked this girl and the fact that she wanted me over them was crazy for me at the time because I'd never experienced that before, at first I thought I was getting way ahead of myself because at te end of the day I was still an Amrit dhari and a sikh of the guru and as I hadn't done anything to break it apart from stopped doing my nitnem for a while I didn't want to risk doing something that bad, but then I got encouraged by my friends to go for it and well I did it and I gave into lust after that I got depressed becoz I knew what I did was wrong, but I felt shameful so I resisted going to the gurdwara and stuff and took of my kirpan n stuff of because I didnt feel worthy to wear em and I didn't know how to face guru ji, I spent about half a year being shameful and depressed and then I started to fix up after that and start praying and everyday since then I ask guru ji for forgiveness even till nw, I got rid of my old friends and made new ones, good ones and I focus on school more, since that girl didnt go to my school I never had to face her again and from there I just started trying to become religious again, everyday I wake up at 6 and do my 5 bani's and I ask mahraj for forgiveness for being so foolish. I know I'll never do something like that again but I don't know what do now, do I beed to take Amrit again? My patens don't know anything about this, how do I tell them I need to take Amrit again? What would I say to the punj piare? I'm so confused ... Has any1 ever been thru something like this? I can't tell me parents because I just can't, they won't be able to take it..

I'm truly sorry for bring up this topic but I need help I dont know how to feel or what to do!?

Wjkk wjkf

[MaiVelleeHaan]

So you got into a relationship with this girl, did you have any physical contact ? If you and this girl had a relationship then yes you gotta go get pesh and tell the panj pyare ur mistake. You don't need to tell your parents. Just go to the next Amrit sanchar and tell the panj pyare exactly what happened, just be like I was in a relationship with a girl and if u guys had physical contact then you gotta tell them that to. Don't worry, I know its scary, I've been through something similar, I just had my head down the whole time I talked to the panj pyare lol. It's really good that your trying to get back on the right path. I admire that, your really lucky. My brother is a year younger then you and he broke his Amrit he has a girlfriend, he shaves his bread he doesn't wear all the kakars only a dastar and kara. He knows he's doing bad things but he can't help it, he's too stuck in maya. I'm proud of you that you got rid of ur old friends and started asking guru sahib ji for forgiveness. All you gotta do is take Amrit again and do the punishment given by the panj pyare. Keep in mind to NEVER stop doing nitnem and naam Simran, they r very very important. I know I did when i went to India 2 years ago and I learned my lesson. When your Simran is less then you get trapped in maya easily. Do lots of seva as well. Sangat is really important to ! Simran seva sangat these 3 are essential. Do Charan dhoor as well, it's the best place to ask for forgiveness. You can do it anywhere Guru Granth Sahib ji is parkash. All you do is pick up a chorda and put it to ur metha close ur eyes and do ardas from the bottom of ur heart. Doing Charan dhoor also washes your sins just like doing naam Simran washes ur sins. Charan dhoor is important, many people don't know about it or know its importance.

I wish you luck and don't worry guru sahib ji is bakhshanhar, he forgives his kids, he loves us, we aren't perfect, nobody is only guru sahib ji is. Have faith in guru sahib ji, read gurbani and try to understand what guru sahib ji says.

[Guest misskaur]

So you got into a relationship with this girl, did you have any physical contact ? If you and this girl had a relationship then yes you gotta go get pesh and tell the panj pyare ur mistake. You don't need to tell your parents. Just go to the next Amrit sanchar and tell the panj pyare exactly what happened, just be like I was in a relationship with a girl and if u guys had physical contact then you gotta tell them that to. Don't worry, I know its scary, I've been through something similar, I just had my head down the whole time I talked to the panj pyare lol. It's really good that your trying to get back on the right path. I admire that, your really lucky. My brother is a year younger then you and he broke his Amrit he has a girlfriend, he shaves his bread he doesn't wear all the kakars only a dastar and kara. He knows he's doing bad things but he can't help it, he's too stuck in maya. I'm proud of you that you got rid of ur old friends and started asking guru sahib ji for forgiveness. All you gotta do is take Amrit again and do the punishment given by the panj pyare. Keep in mind to NEVER stop doing nitnem and naam Simran, they r very very important. I know I did when i went to India 2 years ago and I learned my lesson. When your Simran is less then you get trapped in maya easily. Do lots of seva as well. Sangat is really important to ! Simran seva sangat these 3 are essential. Do Charan dhoor as well, it's the best place to ask for forgiveness. You can do it anywhere Guru Granth Sahib ji is parkash. All you do is pick up a chorda and put it to ur metha close ur eyes and do ardas from the bottom of ur heart. Doing Charan dhoor also washes your sins just like doing naam Simran washes ur sins. Charan dhoor is important, many people don't know about it or know its importance.

I wish you luck and don't worry guru sahib ji is bakhshanhar, he forgives his kids, he loves us, we aren't perfect, nobody is only guru sahib ji is. Have faith in guru sahib ji, read gurbani and try to understand what guru sahib ji says.

What exactly is charan dhoor?

Sorry for the ignorance im still learning.

[MaiVelleeHaan]

Don't worry, everyone is learning,people r always going to keep learning, we can never know everything.

Charan dhoor is the dust of the feet of the holy.

[Gurpreet14]

Don't worry, everyone is learning,people r always going to keep learning, we can never know everything.

Charan dhoor is the dust of the feet of the holy.

my mother calls it "Charni lagna" means u start reading Guru Granth Sahib ji.. Is is the same as Charan dhoor?

[Gurpreet14]

We are human n mistakes happens....

No worries if u realize ur mistakes then thats a great thing....

u know u were wrong n u did something wrong.... then u r not at fault....

Its said na Guruji forgive us when we accept our mistake and say sorry to him but repeating ur mistake can harm you again...

u again wanna take amrit right... but before doing so just prepare urself mentally... once ur brain n heart both synchronize with each other then take amrit. Its not a fault to get trapped with a girl or boy before marriage... but after marriage having extra marital affair is bad.... it happens... dont take it to be so serious issue... U know one lady told me that amrit never breaks..

U drink amrit it goes into your blood... it keeps on circulating in ur body.. as ur body remains intact with ur body so as amrit..

its just a routine which breaks... so dont worry dear.. u have a life to spend.. learn more about sikhi.. n leave everything to him.. he wants u to come back to him.. that y u r regreting... understand his call.. he luvs everyone... bad/good etc.. all the best for ur life

[MaiVelleeHaan]

Charni lagna is different from Charan dhoor which is also known as jordeyan see seva.

[JiwanSingh7072]

Veer, as above posters have mentioned, just go to an Amrit Sanchaar, and tell the Panj everything. As far as parents, just explain to them you felt you made some mistake, and you would like to go pesh for it.

But also, try to get as much sangat as possible. Staying connected with Gursikhs always helps one keep their nitnem and abhiaas going. Every Gursikh is an inspiration.

[sat]

Really Sorry for engine this topic up!

I am 17 years old. I took amrit at the age of 12 because I felt very connected with the guru at the time and i knew and I still know that the main objective in this life is to become jot Vich jot with waheguru, and the first step to doing so is Amrit for a Sikh, that's why I took it at an early age because I felt like I didn't want to waste my time as we don't know we are gonna die, anyway..it was going well till I was about 14/15, at 14/15 puberty hit and I felt more prone to 5 evils, I got involved with the wrong crowd, and The effect of this was I stopped doing my nitnem and Simran and alot of things...I pretty much gave up being an Amrit dhari for a while and then this girl came into the picture... loads of guys liked this girl and the fact that she wanted me over them was crazy for me at the time because I'd never experienced that before, at first I thought I was getting way ahead of myself because at te end of the day I was still an Amrit dhari and a sikh of the guru and as I hadn't done anything to break it apart from stopped doing my nitnem for a while I didn't want to risk doing something that bad, but then I got encouraged by my friends to go for it and well I did it and I gave into lust after that I got depressed becoz I knew what I did was wrong, but I felt shameful so I resisted going to the gurdwara and stuff and took of my kirpan n stuff of because I didnt feel worthy to wear em and I didn't know how to face guru ji, I spent about half a year being shameful and depressed and then I started to fix up after that and start praying and everyday since then I ask guru ji for forgiveness even till nw, I got rid of my old friends and made new ones, good ones and I focus on school more, since that girl didnt go to my school I never had to face her again and from there I just started trying to become religious again, everyday I wake up at 6 and do my 5 bani's and I ask mahraj for forgiveness for being so foolish. I know I'll never do something like that again but I don't know what do now, do I beed to take Amrit again? My patens don't know anything about this, how do I tell them I need to take Amrit again? What would I say to the punj piare? I'm so confused ... Has any1 ever been thru something like this? I can't tell me parents because I just can't, they won't be able to take it..

I'm truly sorry for bring up this topic but I need help I dont know how to feel or what to do!?

Wjkk wjkf

Stop beating yourself up little brother, if you are truly sorry and this wont happen again or anything else to break you amrit and rehat, then do ardas as i suspect you already have many times, go to the panj pyare, you wont have to go into details and just say i gave into kaam and committed a bujjar kurehat, when i went for my amrit sanchar there were people retaking amrit , they were taken to one side and asked very briefly and told sternly to be true to there amrit in the future, and give penance to do. joreah di seva one day a week for a month then told do ardas before SGGS JI but what you will get that's there decision. As for you parents i am not saying to deceive them , but by telling them you will only hurt them so is there any need, but that's your decision alone. what i will say is everyone deserves a chance once maybe twice but that's it, FAIL AGAIN THEN FORGET IT!

[Guest Wahh]

What about this girl? You got into a relationshp with her, it seems you got physical but now you've realised you were wrong, you just drop her and move on because you'll never have to face her? What about her? Give that much thought? Or is it just about you, your feelings- you got the girl and what you wanted but now you've had enough, you just drop her and move on. Nice.