Jump to content

marriage probs


Recommended Posts

Guest no one

my husband and i keep arguing,i keep directing him towards sikhi and doing whats right bt he thinks i am telling him what to do

how cn i resolve these issues as they keep returning..

every1 thinks i can control his actions etc but he does what he wants..but i feel i get blamed as i am a woman

i believe his decisions and actions will affect me and our kids ..and jst dnt no what to do..and no1 else to turn to.....

Link to post
Share on other sites

You truly can't control anyone. If there are small things like his habits you don't like or his small small actions, you will have to accept them. No man can like if he is controlled. He accepts you with your good and bad and so should you! People who tell you to control your husband are wrong - don't listen to them. True relations aren't made by controlling and forcing. They are made by love and acceptance.

But if there are more complex things about big decisions, then proper communication is very very important. You address your concerns and he will express his... then you both try to understand each other and each other's perspectives. And respect the differences!

If it is about sikhi values... even then you can't control him. It's all Guru Sahib's play! If you want him to be a better sikhi... best thing you can do is to become a better sikh yourself so he can look up to you and see. Honestly, it truly works! Play Gurbani in your house.. do simran everyday including nitnem. Do ardaas every single day to ask for gursikhi in your house. Do seva! That is all you need to do.

You inspire others with love, you can't control.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Guest

Some words of wisdom from an elderly uncle at Gurdwara.

" If you want your marriage to work then divide the day into three parts or zones.

One part do what you want and let your spouse do what he/she wants.

Second part come together and do things which you both like.

Third part do what your spouse wants you to do. "

This way both husband & wife can live in harmony.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...

You haven't elaborated on what 'wrong' things he does but I will say this : Sikhi is not something you can force, lecture or scare someone into. It is, quite simply about feeling the love. I guarantee that if he makes a habit of attending the Gurdwara, getting involved in the children's activities in the Gurdwara etc, he will, before long, get an amazing feeling that will make him want to take even greater steps towards Sikhi without you having to say a word.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...


  • Topics

  • Posts

    • Not just North Punjabi/Mirpuri Pakistani types in the UK, presumably the below article refers mainly to white males   Samaritans volunteers met vulnerable callers for sex https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-58057031 By Jennifer Meierhans BBC News Published 50 minutes ago Share IMAGE SOURCEGETTY IMAGES Samaritans says it has introduced new safeguarding measures after volunteers met vulnerable callers for sex. The charity, which offers a helpline to people in distress, will reportedly monitor calls in future to prevent inappropriate relationships. The Telegraph found incidents of middle-aged men using their position to meet up with female callers for sex. The charity told the BBC it did not dispute that a "very small number of safeguarding incidents" had occurred. Samaritans chief executive Julie Bentley said the "extremely rare" incidents had been identified and that swift and appropriate action had been taken. According to the Telegraph, a memo to volunteers said 44 serious incidents had occurred since 2017. Ms Bentley said Samaritans' 20,000 volunteers provided vital emotional support to anyone who is struggling, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Volunteers on the charity's telephone service have answered more than 13 million calls in the four years from January 2017, she said. 'Robust investigation' "Running any national service on this scale means that, on extremely rare occasions, high standards are not always met and from the millions of calls answered, a very small number of safeguarding incidents were identified," said Ms Bentley. "Our robust investigation procedures meant these incidents were handled swiftly and appropriate action taken. "Any safeguarding matter is one too many and as such we review our practices on an ongoing basis and have introduced further measures as part of our commitment to delivering a consistently high-quality experience for our callers." Incidents are investigated by the charity's Serious Safeguarding Panel and are reported to the Charity Commission, Samaritans said.
    • I think this type of attitude helps keep Panjab economically backwards.  
    • This history seems true. It's not a new discovery, and this Zorowar Singh palit has a history and legacy in Bassi Pathaan that people there still acknowledge.  Info has been out about Zorowar Singh Palit since the late 60s at least, when Ganda Singh put out Sri Gursobha. That people here haven't heard of him here says more about their own piss poor study of history than anything else.  Plus this figure being from a tarkhan background would have motivated the usual jut casteists to jealously try and bury his memory, so that probably played a big part in his occlusion and hence so much ignorance about him. I'm not too familiar with Uhdoke, what makes you say the above about him?    
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use