Heartbroken

[skaur8888]

1. Get off depression pills or any other pills you're taking.

2. Hit the rock bottom. Instead of trying to keep your mind off of her by doing excessive paath and Nitnem, don't do it at all. Hit the rock bottom. Then connect with life again. This is where you can start doing Paath and Bani. This is actually a good reason. Not to keep your mind off of your gf.

3. Understand Japji Sahib. Especially the first 5 Pauris. Over and over.

4. Its not going to happen overnight so be patient.

it might be best to get advice from your doctor before stopping pills as coming off them can have side effects including making you feel worse which isn't good if you're feeling vulnerable. If you plan to come off them, get your doctor's help with it.

[VanHelsingh]

Also, avoid songs by Durga Rangila, especially when going on long coach trips. :giggle:

[Singh559]

Whatchu say, boy? :giggle:

Don't mind VanHelSingh he's a house dude. We are field dudes.

[VanHelsingh]

Don't mind VanHelSingh he's a house dude. We are field dudes.

Any more of that lip from you and you're going in the hot-box. :giggle:

[Wingz23]

Any more of that lip from you and you're going in the hot-box. :giggle:

Cut it Out Homie! :lol:

Where on earth did you get that picture from? and What possessed you to keep it as your SS Picture? :D

[VanHelsingh]

Cut it Out Homie! :lol:

Where on earth did you get that picture from? and What possessed you to keep it as your SS Picture? :D

Dunno, just felt a bit mischievous, lol.

[Singh559]

Any more of that lip from you and you're going in the hot-box. :giggle:

lol

[proactive]

The way to look at your situation is that when you are in 'love' you are attached to the here and now. You feel the elation when the person you love is with you and you feel the pain of separation when she is not with you. You need to look beyond the here and now. Focus on the future, imagine what you want a year from now, such as finish your degree, or have a career that you always wanted or to train and lose weight.

The mind is very fickle, it can make you think that the person leaving you is the end of your world but if you can master your mind then you can turn this from a negative to a positive. Imagine all the free time you have and how you can spend it doing something positive like improve your health, work on improving your career, sewa or attend samagams etc. The thing is that when you are in 'love; you always exaggerate the person's positives and gloss over their negatives, in order to move on you need to start doing the reverse of this as this will be one of the things which will start to get you back to normal and not remain a wuss crying over someone instead of moving on with you life. Think of all the negative personality traits she had, It may be difficult at first because you may still think you are in love with her and have glossed over her negatives. Speak to other people who know her just to get their views on her negatives, When you have her negatives then exaggerate them and think of how your life would have been if you were still together and how her negatives would have a negative impact on your life. Negatives such as she wasn't ambitious, wasn't into Sikhi etc. The more you exaggerate her negatives the more your mind will start to believe that you are better off without her and then you will reach a stage that you will thank your lucky stars that she left you and you will actually feel embarrassed when you think about all the time you wasted in being heartbroken over her

You also need to, for the next few months at least stop going to places where you used to go with her. If you went to a particular restaurant or cinema ect. avoid that place because the mind will just bring the memories of her flooding back. Also get rid of anything she gave you such as a birthday gift or card etc. You need to avoid and get rid of anything which brings her to mind.

Start to think about what the negatives were with the person, such as she wasn't ambitious, wasn't into Sikhi etc. The more you exaggerate her negatives the more your mind will start to believe that you are better off without her and then you will reach a stage that you will thank your lucky stars that she left you and you will actually feel embarrassed when you think about all the time you wasted in being heartbroken over her.

I am not saying this will be easy but once you follow the above and empower yourself then the sooner you will get back to normal. I hope you get over her and soon,

[Guest Manmeet]

The way to look at your situation is that when you are in 'love' you are attached to the here and now. You feel the elation when the person you love is with you and you feel the pain of separation when she is not with you. You need to look beyond the here and now. Focus on the future, imagine what you want a year from now, such as finish your degree, or have a career that you always wanted or to train and lose weight.

The mind is very fickle, it can make you think that the person leaving you is the end of your world but if you can master your mind then you can turn this from a negative to a positive. Imagine all the free time you have and how you can spend it doing something positive like improve your health, work on improving your career, sewa or attend samagams etc. The thing is that when you are in 'love; you always exaggerate the person's positives and gloss over their negatives, in order to move on you need to start doing the reverse of this as this will be one of the things which will start to get you back to normal and not remain a wuss crying over someone instead of moving on with you life. Think of all the negative personality traits she had, It may be difficult at first because you may still think you are in love with her and have glossed over her negatives. Speak to other people who know her just to get their views on her negatives, When you have her negatives then exaggerate them and think of how your life would have been if you were still together and how her negatives would have a negative impact on your life. Negatives such as she wasn't ambitious, wasn't into Sikhi etc. The more you exaggerate her negatives the more your mind will start to believe that you are better off without her and then you will reach a stage that you will thank your lucky stars that she left you and you will actually feel embarrassed when you think about all the time you wasted in being heartbroken over her

You also need to, for the next few months at least stop going to places where you used to go with her. If you went to a particular restaurant or cinema ect. avoid that place because the mind will just bring the memories of her flooding back. Also get rid of anything she gave you such as a birthday gift or card etc. You need to avoid and get rid of anything which brings her to mind.

Start to think about what the negatives were with the person, such as she wasn't ambitious, wasn't into Sikhi etc. The more you exaggerate her negatives the more your mind will start to believe that you are better off without her and then you will reach a stage that you will thank your lucky stars that she left you and you will actually feel embarrassed when you think about all the time you wasted in being heartbroken over her.

I am not saying this will be easy but once you follow the above and empower yourself then the sooner you will get back to normal. I hope you get over her and soon,

I beg to differ...it's not sikhi to look for bad points in someone. Remember Kabir Ji........yes, this person needs to move on because she left him already for someone else. But that's should be alone reason....why regret the times you spent with her...it might be really precious to him. Simple thing to do is accept that she wasn't your soulmate. There is someone else for you...take it as his Hukam.... Do paath Waheguru will show you the way to real happiness. Let Waheguru enter your life and take over.

[VanHelsingh]

Making yourself hate somebody for their negative aspects is harsh. We all have aspects to ourselves that aren't perfect, and imagine how much it would hurt for somebody to focus on those aspects in order for someone to justify not liking us. It's one way of getting over someone, but I wouldn't recommend it as it just ends up in bitterness. It's best to chalk up the experience as a life lesson, and use it as a way of growing and improving. It's a very Panjabi way of turning what may have been good - on the whole - but interpreting it as something terrible in order to allow yourself to move on. That's not a very grown up thing to do; you're almost deluding yourself and creating a fantasy of bad memories. But if it works then fair play but I wouldn't recommend it.