Respecting Your Parents Or Not?

[Guest Sij]

So as I have stated in the past I am a Hispanic Sikh. Yesterday I encountered an obstacle I wasn't expecting. They don't want me to wear a turban just yet. My parents are seriously worried that a. Wearing a Turban, becoming a Gursikh i optional b. living in the States with a turban can be dangerous and c. that I have jumped too quick on Sikhi and should learn more before wearing a turban. I have been practicing Sikhi for about half a year now. My bare minimum Sikh routine:

1. Wake up and read Japji Sahib

2. Do at least once every week Simran

3. Go to Gurdwara to pray and listen to evening prayers once every two weeks

4. Practice Gurmukhi every other day

5. Listen to Sikh HIstory podcast/ Sikhwithin (shabads with translations after) podcast once or twice every other day

6. Read Kirtan Sohila before sleeping

7. Read Bani daily

As to my physical characters I cover my head daily with a bandana and recently I have begun to wear a turban. I outline all of this because this community might know better than me if I am ready for this step. I want to wear a Turban for the following reasons:

1. Associate with and let others know I am Sikh

2. Explain to others the misconception of Sikh (i.e. don't have to be Punjabi to be Sikh or Sikh are distinct from Muslims)

3. Show my love for God by daily tying and wearing the Turban

4. Show respect to God by covering my head as I already do when I go to the Gurdwara

So now my dilemma. They have asked me to not wear or cover my head with a bandana/Turban for the next two years (how long it will take before I graduate from law school). However, I have read that tomorrow is not guaranteed, that we should Honor God there and now.

I want to show my love for God but I don't want to go against my parents. Can anyone help me by quoting GGSJ with what to do? I am only on page 90 and so I can only refer to a limited amount of the GGSJ for answers. Thanks in advance for your help.

What I have found on googleling Bani regarding this:

"O son why do you argue with your Father? It is a sin to argue with the one who fathered and raised you." GGSJ p. 1200

P.S. if anyone goes to a Gurdwara that has a Granthi that can speak English well (sorry its just hard for me to understand Uncle Jis who don't speak English very well over the phone) can you send me the number of the Gurdwara. My local Gurdwaras only have Punjabi speakers and so I can't turn to them...Thank you again.

[sat]

Respecting and obeying are two different things.

respect always i.e not shouting or using harsh or foul words, violence, cheating, hating, arguing etc.

Obey yes but if you are being asked to turn away from God then i think you already know the answer.

Read about Guru Nanak Ji Maharaj you will find your answers regarding how one should be with their parents and also what to do if you are being asked not to follow the path to vaheguru ji.

Good luck.

[AmanSingh1867]

Brother, I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Instead, I just want to let you know that there is much much more to Sikhi than wearing a turban and growing out your beard. And I say this as a guy who has both of those things.

When talking to Muslims, Guru Nanak Dev Ji said:

"Let mercy be your mosque, faith your prayer-mat, and honest living your Koran. Make modesty your circumcision, and good conduct your fast. In this way, you shall be a true Muslim. Let good conduct be your Kaabaa, Truth your spiritual guide, and the karma of good deeds your prayer and chant. Let your rosary be that which is pleasing to His Will. O Nanak, God shall preserve your honor."

Sikhi is about action, action and more action! Having a certain look doesn't make you a Sikh, your works, your conduct, makes you a Sikh. It is wonderful that you love Guru Ji and want to take the next step by wearing a turban. But a turban does not show your love for God, service of humanity, being a good person, helping others is the best way to show your love of God.

On the flipside, Guru Gobind Singh Ji has very clearly said that he is with the Khalsa. Putting on a turban and growing out your hair will bring you one step closer to being a Khalsa, even if you have not taken Amrit. You will be recognizable in a crowd of 100,000. If you really want to start wearing a turban, but are afraid of a backlash from the people around you, then just know that fear is one emotion that a Sikh does not feel

[Guest dili]

Brother, I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Instead, I just want to let you know that there is much much more to Sikhi than wearing a turban and growing out your beard. And I say this as a guy who has both of those things.

When talking to Muslims, Guru Nanak Dev Ji said:

"Let mercy be your mosque, faith your prayer-mat, and honest living your Koran. Make modesty your circumcision, and good conduct your fast. In this way, you shall be a true Muslim. Let good conduct be your Kaabaa, Truth your spiritual guide, and the karma of good deeds your prayer and chant. Let your rosary be that which is pleasing to His Will. O Nanak, God shall preserve your honor."

Sikhi is about action, action and more action! Having a certain look doesn't make you a Sikh, your works, your conduct, makes you a Sikh. It is wonderful that you love Guru Ji and want to take the next step by wearing a turban. But a turban does not show your love for God, service of humanity, being a good person, helping others is the best way to show your love of God.

On the flipside, Guru Gobind Singh Ji has very clearly said that he is with the Khalsa. Putting on a turban and growing out your hair will bring you one step closer to being a Khalsa, even if you have not taken Amrit. You will be recognizable in a crowd of 100,000. If you really want to start wearing a turban, but are afraid of a backlash from the people around you, then just know that fear is one emotion that a Sikh does not feel

Are you saying dont wear a turban to someone who is trying to come closer to Guru ji, you are turning this person away from Guru ji's bana, shabash who needs enemies against the panth when we have so called singhs like you turning people away, oora and joora are the starting point but you are saying dont wear a turban, so how do you expect this person who feels something for sikhi to progress futher ??, keep your nonsense advice to yourself in future !!

[AmanSingh1867]

Are you saying dont wear a turban to someone who is trying to come closer to Guru ji, you are turning this person away from Guru ji's bana, shabash who needs enemies against the panth when we have so called singhs like you turning people away, oora and joora are the starting point but you are saying dont wear a turban, so how do you expect this person who feels something for sikhi to progress futher ??, keep your nonsense advice to yourself in future !!

I would take you more seriously if you had the cajones to post this on your real account without going anonymous.

As for your point, did you miss the parts where I said:

"Brother, I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do." and also:

"If you really want to start wearing a turban, but are afraid of a backlash from the people around you, then just know that fear is one emotion that a Sikh does not feel."?

Btw, I've kept kesh my entire life and also wear a turban (obviously). The turban on its own doesn't bring one closer to God. There are no magical qualities associated with a turban.

OP said he wanted to wear a turban to show respect to God. So all the people in the world who don't wear a turban (98% of the population) are being disrespectful to God? If you want to please God, you do it through your actions. What you wear has little to no bearing on how good of a human being you are.

Put on a turban when you are ready to give your head to the Guru. The turban doesn't make the Sikh, the Sikh makes the turban.