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Is Turban Going To Vanish With Dieing Status Of Kaur


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People are amazed when they are taught Sikhi by me when talking one on one with them. They never have the chance to learn from school etc. So parchar is needed. American gurdwaras are not doing it because committees have different meaningless agendas but parchar should be #1 up there. So that's the source of that problem. Back on topic, our own girls need to get education in Sikhi because many are not interested because in their early ages they weren' t taught right and given too much freedom and are now ending up taking alcohol, drugs, and etc.... I mean if I look at UK past these years, I to myself question why aren't UK Sikhs teaching those girls who came to gurdwara but then get targeted by Muslims in clubs etc... Gurdwaras need to change PERIOD. It needs to focus on the youth and elder too and parchar should be added. Sikh youth need to change the status quo of gurdwaras. We shouldn't be scared of the elder Sikhs who are absolutely leaving a mess for the next generation.

sounds like my childhood , just walking around doing my thing with quickfire questions from all sides , it was challenging but I was lucky I was switched on to Sikhi and also other Dharams so I enjoyed smiling and sharing Sikhi and Guru ji with the different Non-sikh folks , they were always so grateful 'you're the first sikh girl to answer my questions they usually ignore me or say I don't know' I would apologise for the lapse and offer to answer what I could and to be straight when I didn't know (rarely). Religious education classes the other kids would ask me questions or to explain more about other faiths we were studying instead of the teacher cos He just had a script to follow. People really WANT to know us and what makes us tick.

I agree our girls are not invested in , in terms of sikhi, punjabi literature, languages, gatka, gurbani ucharan anything ....why?

Because HIndu dowry system devalues our girls , Guru Gobind Singh ji said to us, He who asks for dowry is not my Sikh. Pity greed is highermost in people's mind than Guru's bachan:' jab eh gahe bipraan ki reet , ma na karoon in ki partit.'

so the girl's family only concentrate on their boys and nuturing their sikhi because 'she's gonna get married and nobody wants to have amritdhari DIL it's no point teaching her this stuff, she'll only make life harder for herself in her in-laws'

I have had friends who are amritdhari and been told off for doing their bania by their in-laws ...why are people so thick? If your DIL is dharmic your grandkids will be Sikhs and also do their bania and have true faith in Guru ji.

As the gurudwarey are full of fools trying to increase their own image rather than serving the sangat's needs we need to show our younger brothers and sisters the online resources , there is now so much english content teaching itihas, doing katha, teaching gurmukhi, even discussing raag kirtan terminology on youtube and other websites. If the parents wont do it we can ...

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sounds like my childhood , just walking around doing my thing with quickfire questions from all sides , it was challenging but I was lucky I was switched on to Sikhi and also other Dharams so I enjoyed smiling and sharing Sikhi and Guru ji with the different Non-sikh folks , they were always so grateful 'you're the first sikh girl to answer my questions they usually ignore me or say I don't know' I would apologise for the lapse and offer to answer what I could and to be straight when I didn't know (rarely). Religious education classes the other kids would ask me questions or to explain more about other faiths we were studying instead of the teacher cos He just had a script to follow. People really WANT to know us and what makes us tick.

I agree our girls are not invested in , in terms of sikhi, punjabi literature, languages, gatka, gurbani ucharan anything ....why?

Because HIndu dowry system devalues our girls , Guru Gobind Singh ji said to us, He who asks for dowry is not my Sikh. Pity greed is highermost in people's mind than Guru's bachan:' jab eh gahe bipraan ki reet , ma na karoon in ki partit.'

so the girl's family only concentrate on their boys and nuturing their sikhi because 'she's gonna get married and nobody wants to have amritdhari DIL it's no point teaching her this stuff, she'll only make life harder for herself in her in-laws'

I have had friends who are amritdhari and been told off for doing their bania by their in-laws ...why are people so thick? If your DIL is dharmic your grandkids will be Sikhs and also do their bania and have true faith in Guru ji.

As the gurudwarey are full of fools trying to increase their own image rather than serving the sangat's needs we need to show our younger brothers and sisters the online resources , there is now so much english content teaching itihas, doing katha, teaching gurmukhi, even discussing raag kirtan terminology on youtube and other websites. If the parents wont do it we can ...

I can tell by Basics of Sikhi that UK sikh youth are stepping up and taking notice of the issues and are trying to change the future (example Tera Panth Vasse). The problem is different everywhere for Sikhs. Sikhs are spread out everywhere in the world but in small numbers. Leaving to a minimum number of Sikh youth to stand up for change in the Panth. For example I am currently the only Sikh youth in my city whos Amritdhari who is trying to do something in my gurdwara but is being ignored. Now Sikh numbers are spread out everywhere. In UK you guys have big Sikh communities that can actually make a change. In America, things are different here of the Sikh youth. Most are not interested and don't believe in change. So we are in a deep hole situation.

I really think its not only the Hindu dowry system but this Punjabi culture influence on girls today like caste system. Punjabi mothers still carry their nonsense stuff today in western countries. But I believe that modern societal values is why Sikh girls don't feel comfortable with the dastaar look on guys. Many Sikh girls I know go to school with barely any Sikhs. So their perception of looking for a guy will rarely be a GurSikh. This happens to many Sikh girls who just keep their hair too. This is why gurdwaras have to change like you said to use resources and variety amount of tools to get them educated in Sikhi and not just learning Sikhi but also doing seva with each other. That way that can make a sangat strong as steel.

Bhai Jugraj Singh even said this statement that 75% SIkhs don't care about Sikhi they may go to gurdwara but thats about it. Then there are 20% or so that keep hair and may be slightly educated in Sikhi or just keep hair because of parents. Then 5% are Amritdhari Sikhs who are affiliated with Nihangs,Taksalis, or AKJ. These percentages may be quite off but to the point Jugraj Singh was trying to make is that those 5% are trying to recruit from 20%. Who is targetting the 75%? You see were are missing out on the majority. The Khalsa has to inspire rest of the Panth. Unfortunately, Khalsa needs to be waken.

Back on the topic, Now another thing related to Kaurs is that those Kaurs in the 20% can go either way. They can cut their hair or become amritdhari. We all know whats happening today is that most Kaurs in that category are choosing to cut their hair and not take Sikhi seriously at all. Over here in America, pretty rare to see Sikh girls chak amrit. Also the Singhs in that category especially today are going towards the 75% due to bullying, racial discrimination, and thinking that no Sikh girls find GurSikh munda attractive. They are many Sikhs who are strong as steel but it shows that majority are going the wrong way.

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How can you be low like that ?

You should be saying I want a singhni who will give my future family strong faith in Guru ji, who is strong in her abhihaas , is intelligent, have a warrior spirit, can read Guru ji and teach children the same; NOT provide me with housemaid service and 'entertain' me jeeez . SIngh ho ke ehni neech soch and you wonder whats up. Try learning to cook and clean and provide your own entertainment THEN look out wards . Become a worthy husband PRIOR to looking for that wife by becoming a true khalsa and having an uchi suchi jiwan.

Guys look for that special SInghni with the Guru's eyes not your human eyes and Ladies look and see Guru ji da ladla Khalsa be discerning all of you - select someone who respects Guru ji and Sikhi if she's looking for a clean-shaven or trim beard sikh (fitt jaun da) or he 's looking for removal of hair, dastaar or even 5 kakkars in singhni (ditto) just do fateh and walk away quickly in the opposite direction don't even look back. Don't be pressurised by your folks into accepting less than a gursikh .

BTW getting a girl from India is no guarantee of getting a singhni she may be even more brainwashed into hating sikhi saroop by Bollywood than girls from Uk USA or Canada; If you want to make sure your sisters are happy in life stop the Bollywood films and serials that the older bibian watch 24/7 and get them to keep sangat at sikh camps instead and keep saroop and rehit of Guru Gobind Singh ji yourselves so that they feel at ease with look and the lifestyle.

I was discussing marriage and caste system with another bhaine ji on another forum this is my view of what we should think of when considering marriage :

Marriage is about life's mission which is to join with Akal Purakh and become Jiwan Mukht, it is sad that now this divine soul's mission has been forgotten and all people can talk about is things which have more to do with MOH , Ahankar, Kaam and LObh . You are one sikh when you are unmarried but marrying gives you lifelong Sangat (Khalsa maths formulae: 1 is Sikh, 2 is Sangat, 5 is Guru) and you can support each other in this most vital of tasks, you live your lives, do your grisht duties, kirt di kamai, have kids but in the understanding that they are a special sewa assigned to you not belongings . Teach them about the world , give them an idea of Sikh Itihas, get them Gurmukhi tution if you can't teach them, make opportunities to join sangat in Gurudwara, play kirtan in the home, do nam jap from the get go and do nitnem banis as a family group . Sure go out, have fun, do sports etc but become whole people.

Jkv ji,

Can you tell me why are you staying with Meat eating & Alcoholic in-laws ?

Let me guess - Money !

Why are you against washing, ironing & cleaning ?

Let me guess - You are not Indian !

Why are you so stressed ?

Let me guess - No Entertainment !

Do you believe in Caste System ?

Sorry can't guess what the "v" stands for in "jkvlondon" :-)

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Jkv ji,

Can you tell me why are you staying with Meat eating & Alcoholic in-laws ?

They live thousands of miles away in Brasil , they have their culture I have mine, But obviously when they visit my kids have to deal with differences in outlook and my kids though young seem more balanced than you.

Let me guess - Money !

what is your problem ?

Why are you against washing, ironing & cleaning ?

I'm not , what I am against is making kids who have to rely on others to do something they can do perfectly well themselves KHALSA IS SUPPOSED TO BE SELF-RELIANT , my three boys can do cooking, laundry ironing etc etc so they can even ease up people's lives when they stay as visitors i.e. they can do sewa for others , my daughter also does her age-appropriate share . I looked after my family when I was unmarried on top of school while my Mum and Dad worked hard to put roti on the table that included all the cooking cleaning, washing clothes, ironing and even making sure my kid brothers and sister had a packed lunch made fresh every morning I am not scared of work.

What I find deplorable in SIkhs is that they don't teach their Male children to be self-reliant in terms of feeding, cleaning and cooking , what are they going to do away from home rely on dhabba,restaurant food or they expect to get a girl to be his cook, washerwoman etc. I mean my grandfather's generation knows how to do that stuff and will do it when it is needed, (My Dad looked after four of us kids (all under seven) for three months when my Mum was in hospital) but the new generation are pampered beyond words they believe that this is something beneath them and that is wrong .

My daughter will be able to do all that and also learn how to fix electrics , do painting and decorating, garderening, growing fruit and veg just like her brothers and just like I can

Let me guess - You are not Indian !

If you mean I am in a foreign country sure I am in Waheguru's universe where each and every person answers for themselves if you mean my blood then you are wrong I am pure punjabi whatever that means. Why, do non- Indians not do housework ????

Why are you so stressed ?

I found your throwaway statements so unbecoming of a Gursikh ... I'm not stressed Waheguru's got my back

Do you believe in Caste System ?

Course Not I follow my Guru not some moorakh's idea of how to subjugate the majority to benefit a minority , how could you as a thinking human believe learning about Waheguru should be restricted and that Waheguru could withhold kirpa on you because of the label a human put to you?

Don't worry it's not Virdi or Punjabi.... I am the type of person that tries to do naam di keti.....for my family's sukh

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The point I wanted to make is "don't preach what you don't practice".

Every one is Unique, therefore their problems are too.

Can't give "meetha chooran" as cure to all.

Sometimes bitter medicine ie Truth is what one needs.

And by Entertainment I mean belly dancing & thai massage, Not Sex.

Sex is a basic need, entertainment is not !

So readers after the discussion with jkvlondon there is no need to prove why Indian homely wives are Always Better.

Thanks Virdee, Virk, Vohra ji :-)

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  • 1 month later...

Why do singhs marry non amritdhari women or amritdhari women that still do the whole bollywoid things. Because they are still stuck in maya.

Why do these type of girls marry amritdhari men because they are a safe bet. These girls had their fun going out with other guys, clubs, pubs and now they are looking for to settle down. Amritdhari guys have good jobs and can provide. They won't come home drunk. She will control the relationship and keep the fire lit under his but to keep him from trying to think of taking charge.

Women are very smart and they manipulate certain men very easily.

That isn't exactly true, Amritdharis are usually people who previously did do wrong things(usually), most Amritdharis used to be Mona, drug-takers, or something else but Guru sahib still blessed them to find Sikhi.

I almost feel sad that our youth already worry more about impressing women rather than the Guru, where did our high status as Khalsa become so attached to women?

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Why muslims r so firm in their belief system?

you can easily join their faith , just say you believe in Mohammed and that he is the true prophet of Allah and then eat Halal meat.... however you can never get out or change you mind as that is death sentence literally...so what you perceive as belief is a mirage a lot of people say they are muslims but don't agree or practice on a daily basis ...

It is an incomplete faith as it fails to recognise both sexes as equally valid receivers of God's blessings and promotes the subjugation of females, child marriage to elderly men, slavery, warfare, killing people of they do not submit to islam. It fails to submit to God's will in terms allowing for other faiths to exist.

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you can easily join their faith , just say you believe in Mohammed and that he is the true prophet of Allah and then eat Halal meat.... however you can never get out or change you mind as that is death sentence literally...so what you perceive as belief is a mirage a lot of people say they are muslims but don't agree or practice on a daily basis ...

It is an incomplete faith as it fails to recognise both sexes as equally valid receivers of God's blessings and promotes the subjugation of females, child marriage to elderly men, slavery, warfare, killing people of they do not submit to islam. It fails to submit to God's will in terms allowing for other faiths to exist.

these people have left Islam without a death penalty. You know some Muslims have also became Christians and Atheists right?
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these people have left Islam without a death penalty. You know some Muslims have also became Christians and Atheists right?

Veer ji ,

some may have converted to other faiths but that has not been in a country where Sharia law is in force , for example recently a Bibi Miriam was about to be given lashes for adultery then hung for apostasy and adultery in Sudan, despite being brought up by her christian Mother into Christian faith and marrying a Christian Man . In Sharia a Muslim man can marry with a woman from any of the semetic faiths but the children will be automatically considered Muslim. DUe to international pressure she was released but has now fled Sudan and is in Italy with her family.

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