Diary Of Sikh Woman: Why I Cannot Get Married

[Akalifauj]

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[Quantavius]

How come? Is there anything wrong with desiring a wife who is more than just her facial hair? That's very harsh.

Why lie to ourselves? Why? Why not just admit the plain, harsh truth that as a man we women to look feminine and not 'manly' with facial hair? I've seen this same type of lies given ie 'she's not my type', 'I prefer shorter/taller women', 'she's not into poetry'....etc, etc when in truth the men are rejecting simply because they are not beautiful and those with facial hair look like men.

BTW 'getting to know the person, dating and finding similar hobbies...etc, etc' are western concepts. They never or rarely existed in Punjabi culture. Both my grandparents didn't meet their future wives until the wedding day (so I've been told). I heard this was pretty much the norm back in the day.

If you are truly 100% beyond looks you will marry whomever your parents choose for you and on the spot you will agree. This 'getting to know the person better, dating....are just lies. There maybe 'some' truth to it but it's mostly used as a reason to reject.

I admit it. I admit, some looks are important to me. Yes, I'm weak and not strong but at least I admit the truth about myself.

I guarantee you, majority of these people advocating allowing facial hair to grow, will never marry a woman who has a slight beard.

Prove me wrong Mr. Singh. The OP is looking for a bachelor. Might I suggest you give her your biodata?

[MisterrSingh]

Stop forcing me into an arranged marriage, it's my life!

[simran345]

Stop forcing me into an arranged marriage, it's my life!

Lolz quantavius bachola bangey

[Singhni MiriPiri]

Why lie to ourselves? Why? Why not just admit the plain, harsh truth that as a man we women to look feminine and not 'manly' with facial hair? I've seen this same type of lies given ie 'she's not my type', 'I prefer shorter/taller women', 'she's not into poetry'....etc, etc when in truth the men are rejecting simply because they are not beautiful and those with facial hair look like men.

BTW 'getting to know the person, dating and finding similar hobbies...etc, etc' are western concepts. They never or rarely existed in Punjabi culture. Both my grandparents didn't meet their future wives until the wedding day (so I've been told). I heard this was pretty much the norm back in the day.

If you are truly 100% beyond looks you will marry whomever your parents choose for you and on the spot you will agree. This 'getting to know the person better, dating....are just lies. There maybe 'some' truth to it but it's mostly used as a reason to reject.

I admit it. I admit, some looks are important to me. Yes, I'm weak and not strong but at least I admit the truth about myself.

I guarantee you, majority of these people advocating allowing facial hair to grow, will never marry a woman who has a slight beard.

Prove me wrong Mr. Singh. The OP is looking for a bachelor. Might I suggest you give her your biodata?

You are forgetting that not everyone is as shallow as you and that looks are very insignificant to those people. There have been singhs that have willingly married women with facial hair but you seem to be overlooking that. Your view will never change sikhi, a true sikh will always follow rehit even if it does not satisfy you. You should not try to mould women to suit your needs for sexual desire. Please do not worry about what women do with their body or faces but worry about yourself.

Regarding your view on western concepts, I see punjabi culture just as bad. Ever wondered why most marriages, whether punjabi or western, are a complete failure or end in divorce? That is because people run after superficial things e.g. money or appearances. When finding a partner, you should be finding a friend. You can only have a strong bond with friend for a life time. A sensible person will find importance in personality, rather than appearances. If you can't follow that mind-set, that’s alright because as you said, you are a weak man.

[Quantavius]

You are forgetting that not everyone is as shallow as you and that looks are very insignificant to those people. There have been singhs that have willingly married women with facial hair but you seem to be overlooking that. Your view will never change sikhi, a true sikh will always follow rehit even if it does not satisfy you. You should not try to mould women to suit your needs for sexual desire. Please do not worry about what women do with their body or faces but worry about yourself.

Regarding your view on western concepts, I see punjabi culture just as bad. Ever wondered why most marriages, whether punjabi or western, are a complete failure or end in divorce? That is because people run after superficial things e.g. money or appearances. When finding a partner, you should be finding a friend. You can only have a strong bond with friend for a life time. A sensible person will find importance in personality, rather than appearances. If you can't follow that mind-set, that’s alright because as you said, you are a weak man.

The OP is looking for a marriage partner. Why don't you extend your 'hand in marriage' to her then?

[Singhni MiriPiri]

The OP is looking for a marriage partner. Why don't you extend your 'hand in marriage' to her then?

LOOOOL!!!! Well if I was a singh and had an interest in marriage, I would say yes if she had an innocent, kind and sweet personality. I would regard that person to be the most beautiful.

[Quantavius]

LOOOOL!!!! Well if I was a singh and had an interest in marriage, I would say yes if she had an innocent, kind and sweet personality. I would regard that person to be the most beautiful.

Yeah right. Look at all the excuses coming out now. LOL!

I rest my case.

[Singhni MiriPiri]

Yeah right. Look at all the excuses coming out now. LOL!

I rest my case.

There are no excuses, I value personality over beauty. Sorry if that is too hard for you to comprehend but you really need to get over the fact that not everyone is like you. Didn't I already say singhs have married women with facial hair.

[skaur8888]

Who said having hair on the face is a male identity and there is no pressure to look the same. Instead women are pressured fanatically to remove hair from all over the body and who doesn't, isn't seen as a human being. Your stereotyping of women is disgusting.

Those photos are the imagination of an artist and is not an accurate representative of the Gurus or women at that time.

When Mai Bhago Kaur went into battle with a sword in hand did she become a male in that moment. According to you, she did, because she lost her softer side.

Women like you should be ridiculed till you drop your oppressive stereotypes of how every women should be. Have some shame.