How To Deal With This?

[Guest fred up]

Wjkk wjkf

Basically the situation is that i live in a lovely family with caring parents and jolly siblings. But the problem which i find is now arising is that ive begun to notice that my parents are doing the typical indian thing ofalways talking negative about people, bless them they have always been kind towards everyone but not always recieved back what they shouldve in the past.... it was there i the past too but it wasnt so bad, ive begun to notice that sometimes i find them saying things which i consider quite mean to someone, which leaves me very shocked!

Ive tried telling them and they haven't really appreciated it and instead im always left feeling that i support other people and make my parents wrong! They say that you dont like anything we say and to some extent i have begun to feel scared thst maybe that is true. But honesyly i cant takeall this negativity abd itx just annoying ehen a little thing can be changed into an OMG massive thing!

Ive spoke to my siblings in which one of them i know has mutual feelings about this situation but i feel that ehenever i discusd any of this with my sibling a short while after ill see my sibling in an argument with my parents. .. this leaves me feeling terrible as i feel as if i havr been winding up situations etc as my parents get VERY upset.... so instead i enjoy writting in a diary. ..

i really need some help with this situation because i absolutely hate listening to all this negativity and wish my parents were back to as thry were... its annoying because when i sit with them most of thr time theyll be taling all this negativity and itll be the same things over and over again... and then teyll complsin thd you guys dont sit with us ... and theres no way i can explain to them and ive tried every way and after the last argument they had with my sibling i have an oath that i seriously am never going to say it to them again. ...

please sangat ji help me out... what is there that i can do for myself so i dont upset them and i can also be happy?

[UsernameTaken]

Awww bless!Lol i feel sorry for u... particularrly when it comes to parents and it all gets emotional and ethical.

Its common that parents find it difficult to face bad comments from children because they want to be looked up at and when children start picking oyt faults they feel hurt as they have put in so much to raise you and all thrh really want is love...

quite ethical really fo you keep their hearts or do you do put a stop to it??

Best thing is to japp naam because by doing that you are not only peaceful yourself but you create an aroma around you that make people around ypu peacefull.... try thinkibg of good positive topic you can discuss with your parents something you and them will enjoy and just trying distracting ghem... negativity is common in oldages as people have seen life n begin feeling angrier as you fong really gain anytjing unless you japp naam...

remember you parents live u so make sure whatever you do your something them that you alsk love them back

[UsernameTaken]

I thought my family was the only one in this lol i sit there thinking why are they so negative and never have anything good to say about anyone? is your parents negativity directed towards you or others?

My dad doesnt really get involved but my mum and sister are constantly in this cycle of talking about others (chugliyan) and it feels as they can never be happy because there always worried about others. I want the best for everone, it annoys me that other peoples issues have become gossip in our house. Rather than sympathising with what people might go through they talk about it

Its difficult for me to say this but if im ever sat with them, which I rarely am anymore, it feels as if there jelous of other people and all this anger hate and negativity just puts a constant pressure on me. I get a knot in my stomach thinking why cant they just be happy?

I find myself becoming more and more distant from them because I dont want to get dragged into it with them which has made me feel more alone. Hardly ever spend time together anymore. I dont have an answer to our problem but it has made me feel better that im not the only one going through this so thank you. I started convincing myself that it was me with the problem and I was just an outsider but then I realised that this negativity isnt my problem and that were just different people. Im glad your parents are still trying to make an effort in the sense that they want you to sit with them, ive never had that. I get home from work and stay in my room now because it feels like theres an atmosphere in the room when im downstairs

Feel free to drop me a message if you ever want to talk bro/sis

its sad how its nearly always the women and later when they rub off the negativity onto the men they will be like 'oh what can we do, meh tha kehndi a challo koi na but eh ni manndeh' LOL !!!

I know!!! people always talk about others faults and then moan that everyone they know are useless / all their relatives are for themselves, but only if they would talk about peoples positives then maybe they will begin liking people....You know what I always try to remember is, everyone thinks their doing right nobody does something whilst thinking 'Im going to do this bad thing' everyone thinks their doing good, so maybe if we try to understand the intentions behind peoples actions then the world could be a happier place lol

also never feel alone, like they say wherever there is the truth, honesty and love, God is also their. So always remember that God is with you, however do try to make an effort with your family, try engaging them in good conversations and when you do know that its going off track try changing It again or if worst comes to worst just escape lol.... the reason why I say its important to spend time with them is because our sangat has a big influence on us, so if you know their bad for you in the aspect of them doing chugliyan, you should try to be the good sangat with them...