What About The Women In Sikhism?

[pavitarsk]

Now that you have mentioned this, let me explain to you why?

If you are a westerner, no matter, if you a sikh or not, we Punjabi sikh men have a very ugly inane habit of placing you females on a 'PEDESTAL' if you know what I mean. Our own then become second class to you!! But you already know that, dont' you? This is the reason, your sikh friends were ignored, because you stole the show! We men feel very flattered to be with one of you! We feel even more chuffed when we greet you because of the attention we get when you answer hehe......................it becomes even more interesting when one of us penddu Punjabi sikh marries one of you, there is a lot of hoo ha..........and WAH JI WAH.....when this happens. Put this all down to our inferiority complex but it is soooo very, very, very accurate and correct. I have many friends that will only go after the white females and look down on their own, they feel they are achieving the unachievable, something great when they finally manage to date one. So, whether your friends were baptised singhees or not, no punjabi sikh will greet them. Nothing to do with showing respect or shyness on the part of sikh males. If the color is right the greeting is dancing upon their lips, but only for a western female, I mean, white!! Do you now get the full picture?

PLEASE, stick to your own culture and try to learn as much about sikhism as you can. You don't want to be following the punjabi culture unless you wanna be placed on a pedestal and worshiped like God. It is pathetic, I know, but the truth has to be told. Enjoy your rights and freedoms as a westerner, why do you want to compromise, what for? You can lead a spiritual life on your own with the help of vaheguru.

I am sure you already know everything I have told you. I have heard many westerns say they get treated like God by our people when they visit their local gurdwaras with sikh friends. Special treatment, in other words. I have never heard vice-versa of this phenomenon lol!

This is not true for every single Sikh man, might be for some. White people already know this, no need to keep repeating it.

[JagsawSingh]

Sorry guys if I'm about to write something a little bit off-topic but everytime I log on to Sikhsangat.com I see an advert on the top about baby safety and I think this is the most apt thread because its more a question for all Sikh women. The advert lists 3 golden rules for baby safety and rule number 1 says 'Baby MUST sleep alone'.

Just wandering what the thoughts of Sikh women are on this because when my children were born the nurses said the baby should sleep alone and both me and the wife told them to get lost. For us, and our culture, forcing a baby to sleep on its own away from its mother is exactly the same as putting it outside on the doorstep at night like people do with cats. I know its not just a Sikh thing because virtually every single human group on planet earth except white northern Europeans (and their off-spring in north america and australia) keep baby with mother for sleep.

The advert itself is from the New York health authority but 100% of the health authority in all the 'white' countries of the world say the same.

When the nurse at the hospital my first chld was born in suggested it to us I thought I'd do some research. Basic research found that babies in 'white' countries that sleep with mother have a higher chance of dying in bed. And thats why they say 'Baby MUST sleep alone'. Further, advanced research revealed the reason for that is because white new born mothers are 1000% more likely to 'enjoy' a glass of wine or beer before retiring to bed with baby so lose that common sense natural motherly instinct in bed that mothers in non-white countries have.

So, on the subject of Sikh women, just wandering whether, while maintaining Sikhi, some Sikh women born in the west have lost that natural god given maternal instinct and put baby on its own at night ?

[CHaamCHrick]

..

[MisterrSingh]

So, on the subject of Sikh women, just wandering whether, while maintaining Sikhi, some Sikh women born in the west have lost that natural god given maternal instinct and put baby on its own at night ?

I can't generalise, but from what I see and hear, young, western Punjabi couples starting to have kids will do up a baby room as a matter of priority as soon as they discover the wife is carrying. They do it because white people do it, and it's a sign of being civilised apparently. That's the basic answer.

The assumption is that when husband and wife have had the kid and he or she's sleeping with mum, the baby will be an obstacle whenever the... ahem... mood strikes. They don't want the kid perving on the parents. Apparently, that causes mental issues for the kid later in life, especially if it's a male.

I'm not sure where I stand on the issue as I don't have children, but my heart says sticking a newborn in another room is rather cold. Don't seem right to me.

[jkvlondon]

Sorry guys if I'm about to write something a little bit off-topic but everytime I log on to Sikhsangat.com I see an advert on the top about baby safety and I think this is the most apt thread because its more a question for all Sikh women. The advert lists 3 golden rules for baby safety and rule number 1 says 'Baby MUST sleep alone'.

Just wandering what the thoughts of Sikh women are on this because when my children were born the nurses said the baby should sleep alone and both me and the wife told them to get lost. For us, and our culture, forcing a baby to sleep on its own away from its mother is exactly the same as putting it outside on the doorstep at night like people do with cats. I know its not just a Sikh thing because virtually every single human group on planet earth except white northern Europeans (and their off-spring in north america and australia) keep baby with mother for sleep.

The advert itself is from the New York health authority but 100% of the health authority in all the 'white' countries of the world say the same.

When the nurse at the hospital my first chld was born in suggested it to us I thought I'd do some research. Basic research found that babies in 'white' countries that sleep with mother have a higher chance of dying in bed. And thats why they say 'Baby MUST sleep alone'. Further, advanced research revealed the reason for that is because white new born mothers are 1000% more likely to 'enjoy' a glass of wine or beer before retiring to bed with baby so lose that common sense natural motherly instinct in bed that mothers in non-white countries have.

So, on the subject of Sikh women, just wandering whether, while maintaining Sikhi, some Sikh women born in the west have lost that natural god given maternal instinct and put baby on its own at night ?

my own situation I kept the baby in a moses basket /cot in our bedroom alongside myself , and was awake as soon as the baby made a sound (still like this) the twins was trickier because they were premature and the space issue so they slept in one cot (one at each end ) and my two year old in another cot in their shared bedroom. Their room door open and mine (both adjacent) plus monitor (because their noise was so quiet I was worried I wouldn't hear soon enough and have them exhausted by crying) worked well . With madam I had her in a moses basket in same room until she outgrew it then . I don't believe babies should sleep alone but I know many Mums who can sleep with the baby in the same room and ignore the crying distressing the kid. As for sleeping with baby in the bed I've done it too , and everyone has been fine , maybe you need to be a conscientious type of Mum and that's what's lacking that and self-awareness

[amarjitpalli]

Dear Friends, I am a westerner sikh trying very hard to follow this religion so I can achieve union with God. I first learned about this religion at school in Religious studies. I was very impressed and since then I wanted to become a sikh and lead a spiritual life. I have noticed while men can leave home and join a place where they can receive spiritual instructions by a Sant or a Master, women have no such place or places to go to. My question is, are there any women who feel like joining/starting a community like a christian 'convent' where women can concentrate on their spiritual development and progress in isolation like the sikh men can do? I have a christian background and I saw many women joining the convents when they were called by God to dedicate their lives to his service. It did not appeal to me at all at the time. I thought how awful!! Now that I have become a sikh for the past five years I find that is exactly what I need to do, to join a community where women can dedicate their lives towards God and make progress spiritually.

I think a life in convent prepares a person to develop a special kind of relationship with God. The nuns there know why they have entered it. It gives them a clear idea of what they want to do by entering the convent. Whereas, by becoming a sikh, I did not realize how difficult it would be to dedicate my life to God because we are always surrounded with people with so many different backgrounds and never understand what your aim in life is. I really need to be alone and among those that are like minded and seeking God in this life realizing that I may never be born again as a human next time. The chances are we may never come back again as humans for a long time. I am quite disheartened about this situation.

I definitely need a place where I can concentrate on God without distractions. I know some people might think it is odd for someone to think this way, but if you live with people who are walking the same path it helps to stay on the path. On the other hand, no matter how determined you are in what you are doing, there are people who will make fun of you and try to dissuade you from following your path with distractions and rude comments. And for someone like me who is a total beginner, it takes a lot of courage and confidence to come back on the path again after I have faced those that challenge me again and again, day in and day out. Even though sikhsim preaches to lead a householder's life we still find men wearing white clothes living in groups with their Master for spiritual instructions. Most Mahapurushas are single and live in sort of manastries, away from their families, why? Why have they not made any or the same provisions for women to do the same? Women also need to grow spiritually and have a special relationship with God to attain liberation.

Women in Sikhism don't have equal rights as men when it comes to making such important decisions such like marriage, education, whether to remain single, if to take the amrit and so on. They are still the property of their parents, brothers and do on. Boys get treated higher and they always want sons.

[Balkaar]

Women in Sikhism don't have equal rights as men when it comes to making such important decisions such like marriage, education, whether to remain single, if to take the amrit and so on. They are still the property of their parents, brothers and do on. Boys get treated higher and they always want sons.

Please don't conflate Gursikhi with the Punjabi culture.

[MisterrSingh]

Please don't conflate Gursikhi with the Punjabi culture.

He has a point.

I don't know or know of anyone who has successfully extricated Gursikhi from Punjabism.

[amarjitpalli]

He has a point.

I don't know or know of anyone who has successfully extricated Gursikhi from Punjabism.

Nor me. They all too busy counting money, no interest in sikhi.

[Balkaar]

He has a point.

I don't know or know of anyone who has successfully extricated Gursikhi from Punjabism.

Veerji, this bloke has done exactly that, and without passing through the usual 3HO conduit as other white Singhs and Singhniaan have done.