Sas Mohan Singh on sikh channel tonight

[mrggg123]

4 hours ago, Big_Tera said:

It should be like this

you <banned word filter activated> if you do that theyll run away from home. 

[kcmidlands]

16 hours ago, Big_Tera said:

I am not for one second laughing at the Grandmother and I have every sympathy her and the 2 kids.  Hope the kids return safely and soundly and have not been harmed in anyway.

I do not however have any sympathy for low down women who run off with muslims and desert their own familys and  laugh in our faces. If I laugh at anyone it is the stupidity of these women we hear about that do stuff like this. 

 

"You hate the sin not the sinner" is a old moto i live by, if someone has done wrong, take time out to try and understand why, it's difficult at time, especially if someone has done you wrong, in this situation we are quick to judge the mother of these boy's but we don't ever look at those who groomed her and how they preyed on her which, in the end, turned her into what she became and left her children abandoned.

I'm a father with daughter's, i worry all the time over thing's like this, heck, something like this happened last year where i live but the local community Sikh's decided to take the law into their own hand's and handle the situation but that was an extreme situation where law enforcement wouldn't do anything because they were afraid of "community tensions".

13 hours ago, Big_Tera said:

So why are Sikh parents not picking up their kids from school? They are probably working for a living. While many muslims are benefit spongers hence have more free time. 

Its a difficult situation. Young girls between 12 and 18 are very rebbelious in nature. They do what they like. They dont listen to their parents. We can do all the talks we want but. its difficult getting thriugh to a strong willed teenager rhat only cares about her friends. 

They are picking them up, but in a lot of case's it's not practical, you can barely scrape by on one wage in this day and age so people have to work, I don't know if your a parent or not but i'll assume your not (please correct me if i'm wrong) but until you have kid's you can read all the book's or articles you want, nothing prepare's you, my eldest girl is hitting teenage years and i worry all the time but i have to rely on making sure she has the right circle of friends, making sure she doesn't have a sheep mentality, putting here in a well regarded school that nurture's her and educates her, she is rebellious but i've not met a single teenager who isn't.

I don't think Muslim parent's are "benefit spongers", i think they face the same difficulties as the rest of us, the only difference is that they have a solid community based around their faith(which to them is everything) and the Sikh community unfortunately don't, our community is fractured, when i grew up in the 80's if some uncle or auntie saw me in town with my mates you knew your mum and dad would find out from them and you'd get a surprise when you got home, nowadays people don't care, they are too self obsessed, next time you see something that you might think is wrong, take 2 minutes out and observe, ask if everything;s okay, the worst that can happen is that you'll be told to bugger off.

[kcmidlands]

18 hours ago, Big_Tera said:

 

Wow, stay classy fella, did it work then, you know, when your parent's slapped you about when you were young, that's why your recommending it i assume.

[mrggg123]

23 hours ago, kcmidlands said:

"You hate the sin not the sinner" is a old moto i live by, if someone has done wrong, take time out to try and understand why, it's difficult at time, especially if someone has done you wrong, in this situation we are quick to judge the mother of these boy's but we don't ever look at those who groomed her and how they preyed on her which, in the end, turned her into what she became and left her children abandoned.

I'm a father with daughter's, i worry all the time over thing's like this, heck, something like this happened last year where i live but the local community Sikh's decided to take the law into their own hand's and handle the situation but that was an extreme situation where law enforcement wouldn't do anything because they were afraid of "community tensions".

They are picking them up, but in a lot of case's it's not practical, you can barely scrape by on one wage in this day and age so people have to work, I don't know if your a parent or not but i'll assume your not (please correct me if i'm wrong) but until you have kid's you can read all the book's or articles you want, nothing prepare's you, my eldest girl is hitting teenage years and i worry all the time but i have to rely on making sure she has the right circle of friends, making sure she doesn't have a sheep mentality, putting here in a well regarded school that nurture's her and educates her, she is rebellious but i've not met a single teenager who isn't.

I don't think Muslim parent's are "benefit spongers", i think they face the same difficulties as the rest of us, the only difference is that they have a solid community based around their faith(which to them is everything) and the Sikh community unfortunately don't, our community is fractured, when i grew up in the 80's if some uncle or auntie saw me in town with my mates you knew your mum and dad would find out from them and you'd get a surprise when you got home, nowadays people don't care, they are too self obsessed, next time you see something that you might think is wrong, take 2 minutes out and observe, ask if everything;s okay, the worst that can happen is that you'll be told to bugger off.

arent the smethwick community tightknit 

[kcmidlands]

4 hours ago, mrggg123 said:

arent the smethwick community tightknit 

No idea, if someone from Smethwick could comment that would be great, i'm just ranting in general that as a community we only ever come together when absolutely needed (in my experience), if we took time out for each other a little more maybe we could prevent future case's like this happening or at least intervene before it get's too late.

[dallysingh101]

12 minutes ago, kcmidlands said:

No idea, if someone from Smethwick could comment that would be great, i'm just ranting in general that as a community we only ever come together when absolutely needed (in my experience), if we took time out for each other a little more maybe we could prevent future case's like this happening or at least intervene before it get's too late.

I hear that!

But as you've previously mentioned, we don't seem to have much community spirit these days. Just broaching the topic of grooming and being ready to deal with it has the average apna family petrified and scuttling away under a rock avoiding the messenger. Even the guys with previous form for standing up against this thing have been left with a bitter taste in their mouths due to the enduring denial people have been in. Those guys predicted the mushrooming of grooming decades ago and if more members of our ahhmm society supported them back then, we probably wouldn't have got into the quagmire we are in today. 

Plus it must be said, how comes so many young apneean grow up to be rebellious, mouthy and jumped up - considering advice from within the community to be restrictive buckwaas? We need to address that. Is it genetic? Do we have a gene pool of rebellious blood due to historical processes (natural selection)?

[Big_Tera]

So you guys are happy for your kids to walk all over you. That is the major issue instead of kids having respect and fear if the parents its the other way around.  No wonder kids today do what they like. When i have kids. They will no who is the Daddy. 

[Ranjeet01]

The trick with parenting, particularly with teenage kids is giving the kids boundaries but at the same time give them a degree of freedom, particularly to make their own mistakes.

It's a balance.

If you are too strict, they will rebel. If you give them too much freedom they will walk all over you. If you molly coddle them too much, they cannot develop the skills to be independent in the big wide world.

As a parent I think it is more important to demonstrate than explicate.

 

[Big_Tera]

Kids need good old fashioned discipline. Not mumbo jumbo talk. A good beating now and then lets them know whos boss.  

[jkvlondon]

2 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

Kids need good old fashioned discipline. Not mumbo jumbo talk. A good beating now and then lets them know whos boss.  

it is stupid people who don't recognise their duties as a parent who talk like you , read Anand Sahib and what we are supposed to do : show them how to traverse in this world on a gurmat path, with love , sure you can admonish but then comes the teaching through vicharna and then the embrace . Beating just shuts down channel of communication and harshness will make them avoid you when trouble comes . They are not YOUR possessions but a special  sewa and take it in that light.