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Not Sardar Jokes : Stand-Up Comedy by Vikramjit Singh


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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

 

A farmer’s wife was terribly jealous.

Evening after evening she subjected her husband to a searching inspection.

When she would find even a single hair on his coat there would be a terrible scene.

One night she found nothing,  so she screamed now it’s a bald-headed woman.

 

                                                     ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The father of five children

 

The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle.

He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.

Who is the most obedient? he asked

Who never talks back to mother?

Who does everything she says?

Five small voices answered in unison

Okay dad you get the toy .

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

A man was brought to Mercy Hospital and taken in for coronary surgery

The operation went well and as the groggy man regained consciousness.

He was reassured by a Sister of Mercy who was waiting by his bed.

Mr Smith you re going to be just fine said the nun gently patting his hand.

We do need to know however how you intend to pay for your stay here.

Are you covered by insurance?

No I m not the man whispered hoarsely.

Can you pay in cash? persisted the nun.

I m afraid I cannot Sister.

Well do you have any close relatives? the nun asked.

Just my sister in Mexico he volunteered.

But she is a humble spinster nun.

Oh I must correct you Mr Smith, Nuns are not spinsters.

They are married to God.

Wonderful said Mr Smith,

In that case

please send the bill to my brother-in-law .

 

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Heart Da Mareej

Ik Premi Ohdi Premika Nu: “Tainu Dekhde Hi Meri Nashaa Ch Khoon Dauran Lag Painda Hai,
Akhan Ch Ajeeb Jehi Garmi Aa Jaandi Hai,
Sara Sareer Kamban Ja Lag Jaanda Hai Te Mera Dil Jor Jor Di Dhadkada Hai.”
Premika: “Tu Taan Yaar, Lagda Koi Heart Da Mareej Takkar Geya Mainu.”
 
 

Falling in Love

Boyfriend Apni Girlfriend Nu “I Love You” Kehnda Hai Te Gir Painda Hai,
Girlfriend: Ae Tusi Ki Kar Rahe Ho?
Boyfriend: I am Falling in Love.

 

Ik  jyotish Wala Joke

Ik jyotish Pappu nu: Beta, Tere Ghar Ch Bhootni Da Saya Hai
Pappu: jyotish ji, main Tainu Bada Maranga, Je Meri Wife De Baare Kuch Boelya...
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