There is only way upwards sometime

[Guest Gurmahekkaur]

I got married about 9 months ago, I had the perfect wedding anyone could dream of. I had left the country to move to where my husband lived, in India. Six months after the marriage I found opium and marijuana in our bathroom. It was at this time I realised my husband was into drugs. Upon questioning, he didn’t confess to it, however later he confessed but said he needed some time and space. I spoke to his parents to keep him away from his friends company who were also involved in drugs but they didn’t listen. Unsure of what to do next, especially when my in laws are very wealthy, and in India money can buy anything even police, my family thought it was safe if I returned to the Uk and we came up with a solution of what to do next. I safely came back to Uk and since I have tried to contact my in laws. My husband has not once contacted me over three months. I have tried every possible way (his friends, his family, his workmates and himself) to get through to him, some won’t answer their phone as my father in law has given strict instructions not to and my husband doesn’t answer his phone or respond to messages. Initially when I came to the UK my father in law asked me for ideas how we could improve his sons drug addiction and I offered everything I knew I could do to help him ( as I am a medical professional), after that no one ever rang from his family. We contacted our relatives who are also convinced my husband isn’t into drugs (after all no one wants to stand against rich people- I guess). I feel very sad and heartbroken because I really wanted to help fix my husbands addiction , I have  been to the Gurudwara for over 3months, asking God to show me a sign to save this marriage but I keep hitting a brick wall. Two weeks ago, my husband informed one of our relatives that he never wanted me back. I am deeply saddened to see that he ended the marriage so easily. I keep asking God why he didn’t give me a chance to help my husband, because after all we all are imperfect and we make mistakes, because it is our duty to help one another. After so many days of grieving, battling and doing ardas, I have given up. I am still not sure if I am doing the right thing but the wise have said that if after so much prayer God won’t answer maybe it’s because it is for our best that we walk away, how true that is only the future will tell me. For everyone out there, on intoxicants please don’t involve yourself in them. Drugs break up relationships and destroy families. 

[Guest Answer]

Penji not to be rude or anything but you say you've given up and that you have no answer and why is this happening to you and this and that... but then you go on to say a line later that 2 weeks ago you got an answer from a relative that he wants to end the marriage. I don't know about you but it looks like you got your answer? Guru Sahib Ji has given you an answer through that relative and now you need to act upon it and move forward with your life. You showed daya and were fearless in helping and that's more than enough of a job of a singhni. Move on and forget the past - get remarried if you want and carry your daya with you forward.

 

Kimmah Karoh.