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who is this guy - sikh priest

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I don't understand why these types don't  just have a  registry wedding.

If they want petals and garlands and dress up them they can.

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4 hours ago, Ranjeet01 said:

It's a Goddess movement. 

😄

the maharani movement 

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28 minutes ago, puzzled said:

Iv actualy seen vids of sikh weddings where they shower the couple with petals as they do their phere,  that's Bollywood/hindu.  

I don't go to sikh weddings because I know they will wind me up. When my parents come back from weddings and I ask them how it was they say how the couple were talking throughout the whole anand karaj, laughing while doing their phere etc   

I mean do what you want at the reception but at least behave in the gurdwara. 

I know a Punjabi lady who recently went to a gujji/punjabi anand karaj and she said the couple were talking and laughing throughout the whole ceromny, the gujaratis in the sangat were talking and had no idea what was going on, they all were lost.    

She said no gurdwara let them have anand karaj so they went to a ravidaas gurdwara and did it there 

This what a lot of interfaith sikh couples are now doing, they go to the ravidaas gurdwara types and get married there. 

 

Argh, you're winding me up just by telling me about this nonsense. I went to a Sikh Anand Karaj a few years ago after around 11 years of not attending one, and I could not believe what I was seeing and hearing. It was a most irreligious spectacle. Nattering and full blown conversation as if people were in the langar hall. Absolutely no respect for the occasion or a sense of spirituality. It broke my heart, and at the time I felt a strange sense of dread for what lay in store for us as a people in the coming years and decades.

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22 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

I don't understand why these types don't  just have a  registry wedding.

If they want petals and garlands and dress up them they can.

About 2 years back when I was walking to the gurdwara this guy who was the groom walked out at the end of his anad karaj, his pagh was thrown over his shoulders and as he stepped out of the gurdwara gates the first thing he said was the F word out of relief!  Someone like that should not be having anand karaj. 

Every Sunday we have a wedding at the gurdwara, you should see the state some of these people are in. 

Tbh I think in some cases it's the mothers. Some people don't want a anand karaj but their mothers start wailing and weeping. I don't exactly come from a religious family and some of my cousins didn't want anand karaj but their mothers started behaving like tragic heroines. One of my cousins didn't want anand karaj but just wanted a registry marriage but his mother and the aunties said that he has to have anand karaj. On the day of the anand karaj he was still recovering from the alcohol feom the previous night and during the lavaan he started walking the wrong way!  He then started complaining that its taking too long. They marriage ended up a divorce anyway. 

Some women need to accept that their sons and daughters are not interested and stop dragging them into anand karaj

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23 hours ago, MisterrSingh said:

Argh, you're winding me up just by telling me about this nonsense. I went to a Sikh Anand Karaj a few years ago after around 11 years of not attending one, and I could not believe what I was seeing and hearing. It was a most irreligious spectacle. Nattering and full blown conversation as if people were in the langar hall. Absolutely no respect for the occasion or a sense of spirituality. It broke my heart, and at the time I felt a strange sense of dread for what lay in store for us as a people in the coming years and decades.

Bro that's the very reason I don't go to sikhs weddings. It winds me up seeing how disrespectful people are.  My friend was telling me he recently went to the wedding and one of the gyanis interrupted and had to ask the ladies to stop talking and cover their heads properly. He was angry and started talking about the lakh of respect and modesty in our community.   He must of been really triggered with what he saw for him to interupt and say all that. 

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1 hour ago, puzzled said:

Bro that's the very reason I don't go to sikhs weddings. It winds me up seeing how disrespectful people are.  My friend was telling me he recently went to the wedding and one of the gyanis interrupted and had to ask the ladies to stop talking and cover their heads properly. He was angry and started talking about the lakh of respect and modesty in our community.   He must of been really triggered with what he saw for him to interupt and say all that. 

I went to one particular  Anand Karaj and straight after the lawan, the female half of the Sangat in the darbar hall  clapped for applause and were whooping and hollering.

The gyani gave them a ticking off and had to tell them this is not the correct protocol.

I sometimes think that the Anand Karaj's in India are much better. 

You only invite close family and you just do the lawan,  keep it short and sweet. No ragis,  no speakers. 

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On 5/12/2019 at 9:54 PM, MisterrSingh said:

Nattering and full blown conversation as if people were in the langar hall.

i remember when there used to be a sacred/respectful silence in the langar hall too.  people used to eat with their head down in humility.

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1 hour ago, Ranjeet01 said:

I sometimes think that the Anand Karaj's in India are much better. 

You only invite close family and you just do the lawan,  keep it short and sweet. No ragis,  no speakers. 

No ragis? Who does the kirtan of the lavan, then?

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6 hours ago, BhForce said:

No ragis? Who does the kirtan of the lavan, then?

Being to a few Anand Karaj's in India, it seems that the Kirtan at the Lawan is more of a western phenomenon. 

On average the Lawan time can last about 2 hours, in India it seems to be done and dusted in 20 minutes. 

Just my observations 

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6 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

Being to a few Anand Karaj's in India, it seems that the Kirtan at the Lawan is more of a western phenomenon. 

On average the Lawan time can last about 2 hours, in India it seems to be done and dusted in 20 minutes. 

Just my observations 

I appreciate that you state that it's just your observations, similarly these are just mine:

OK, I think what you must be saying is "kirtan" referring to other shabads being sung  beyond the lavan.

But the 4 lavan themselves are supposed to be sung. 

From the Sikh Rehit Maryada: "After the conclusion of the recitation of each of the stanzas, the boy, followed by the girl holding the end of the sash, should go round the Guru Granth Sahib while the ragis or the congregation sing out the recited stanza."

So, the ragis do indeed have to do kirtan of the lavan themselves. 

Singing a whole bunch of additional shabads is optional.

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33 minutes ago, BhForce said:

I appreciate that you state that it's just your observations, similarly these are just mine:

OK, I think what you must be saying is "kirtan" referring to other shabads being sung  beyond the lavan.

But the 4 lavan themselves are supposed to be sung. 

From the Sikh Rehit Maryada: "After the conclusion of the recitation of each of the stanzas, the boy, followed by the girl holding the end of the sash, should go round the Guru Granth Sahib while the ragis or the congregation sing out the recited stanza."

So, the ragis do indeed have to do kirtan of the lavan themselves. 

Singing a whole bunch of additional shabads is optional.

I am talking about the additional shabads after the marriage ceremony has taken place and then some speaker they have afterwards. 

This is when people get fidgety. 

In India I have heard that Lawan are supposed to be done before sunrise. 

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36 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

I am talking about the additional shabads after the marriage ceremony has taken place and then some speaker they have afterwards. 

Got it.

Generally, I have seen the weddings of non-religious or "moderate" Sikhs are short in India. Religious Sikhs have longer Anand Karaj's where they have a longer kirtan and dhadis/speakers/etc.

37 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

In India I have heard that Lawan are supposed to be done before sunrise. 

Before sunrise? Generally I have seen a desire to do lavan before 12 noon in both India and the West. But not before sunrise.

Before sunrise would be for really hardcore Sikhs (non-religious Sikhs don't get up early anyways).

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20 hours ago, Ranjeet01 said:

I went to one particular  Anand Karaj and straight after the lawan, the female half of the Sangat in the darbar hall  clapped for applause and were whooping and hollering.

The gyani gave them a ticking off and had to tell them this is not the correct protocol.

I sometimes think that the Anand Karaj's in India are much better. 

You only invite close family and you just do the lawan,  keep it short and sweet. No ragis,  no speakers. 

That's really bad. People like that should not be allowed to have anand karaj.

I remember seeing the below vid years ago. And the groom actually stands up for the woman when she's walking in. What can be bigger disrespect to guru sahib in his darbar. How can people do that.  Standing up for a mere mortal in front of guru ji.    I think for people like that it's just a book  🙁    look at from 16:30 

 

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12 hours ago, Ranjeet01 said:

Being to a few Anand Karaj's in India, it seems that the Kirtan at the Lawan is more of a western phenomenon. 

On average the Lawan time can last about 2 hours, in India it seems to be done and dusted in 20 minutes. 

Just my observations 

In India , most people stay in the shaadi 'palace' eating, drinking, partying up whilst the people who actually came to see the Anand Karaj could be counted on two hands , my bro got married there and it was only the amritdhari sikhs and bazurg who bothered . The ragis looked shocked that we wanted a longer kirtan session and sikhiya to the couple. Mind you nobody returns fateh there, sings along with Kirtan anywhere.Godless due to hand of Guru ji's protection being withdrawn due to their mentally ill rejection of sikhi

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54 minutes ago, puzzled said:

That's really bad. People like that should not be allowed to have anand karaj.

I remember seeing the below vid years ago. And the groom actually stands up for the woman when she's walking in. What can be bigger disrespect to guru sahib in his darbar. How can people do that.  Standing up for a mere mortal in front of guru ji.    I think for people like that it's just a book  🙁    look at from 16:30 

 

The problem is that a lot of western wedding norms are getting mixed up with our traditions.

These "kids" think because that Church weddings have everyone standing when the bride comes in that we do the same, or when there is applause we should do the same.

It is just ignorance. Sometimes it is pure common sense but these kids need it spelt out what is correct and what is not.

If there is one western practice we could adopt is a semblance of the rehearsal like a rehearsal lawan. Then you could go through stuff with the couple and tell them what to expect and the correct protocol is.

The video here shown is either from US or Canada.

Canada in particular is far more extreme than the UK in that either Sikhs are very religious or extremely westernised or what they call "whitewashed ".

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