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Guruguruji
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Guest $$$$_guest
On 8/5/2020 at 12:18 AM, Guest Advice is FREE said:

Dont be shy about asking for advice or help. People who mind and are getting mad for no reason are idiots

Its not like advice costs them anything. And if you choose not to follow that advice, it is because it wasn't good advice. You best can decide what is suited to your life and circumstances. And a wise person does not follow advice blindly. In fact, if you choose not to follow their advice, that means their advice was terrible.  As it didn't help and didn't address your situation adequately. So far it hasn't helped, so their help and advice sucked.

People say we are sangat, ask for help. Then when you do, and its a complex issue not easily solved, they get butthurt. And chase the person with problems away. Then say, oh why is the panth in this state.

It

 

It doesn’t cost much to be polite or civil, that’s true in my part of the world.  Those people that are losing their patience are not ‘idiots’, they are just losing their patience because you are pursuing a goal which is not for you to pursue in the first place. The man has left you and there is nothing you can do to bring him back, unless you resort to some occultist with powers greater than vaheguru!  You should know as a gursikh person there is no one higher than  vaheguru. His powers are greater than any damn occultist on this planet.

 

Because their advice doesn’t cost them anything, they have been more than willing to give advice to you, without billing you. Normally, it costs $$$$ if you were ever to seek it from shrinks. So, be very grateful for their kindness and  their patience towards you.

 

You have chosen not to follow their advice not because it is not good but because you already know the answer within. You already know within your mind that he is NOT RETURNING. You also know that he has already either got someone else or is in the process of find one. Why are you going so shamelessly public about your private life if you already know what is the best decision for you. In other words, why are you so imprudent about disclosing everything confidential about your private life to strangers on this forum? Surely, you cannot expect people to offer you tailor-made help, they don’t even know you, they are not professional psychiatrists? They are strangers members of general public.

 

YOU NEED A PSYCHIATRIST to deal with you. Seek some counselling for yourself, from a marriage counsellor. You are an ungrateful person for not appreciating all the patience and help that’s been given to you here. In fact, you are a very rude person, no one is forcing you to follow their advice. Definitely, a wise person doesn’t follow anything blindly be it advice or anything. Why? Because a wise person knows when to stop pursuing a dead end situation, leading nowhere. A wise person knows when to STOP. 

 

No one is perfect, except vaheguru. He is the only one tho is perfect. But you are blaming him too for not giving you a perfect advise, aren’t you?  A wise person respects vaheguru’s bhanna? A wise person also knows everything vaheguru does is good and correct for him, the wise person.

 

 

 

Everyone has given their advice to the best of their abilities, so it wasn’t terrible at all. Their advice was equivalent to their best ability. There is no way their help or advice sucked! No way!  For you it was terrible and sucked, because you are a horrible, unappreciative and rude person. Do you see now why he left you? I hope you can find some answers to the question, why he left you? 

 

This is a sikhsangat forum, that’s true. Sangat offers any help it can give others without billing anyone. It’s free of charge. The least you can do is show some respect towards the Sangat and appreciate all the help anyone can give you, whether you like it or not. Stop insulting everyone here. Grow up and learn some manners.

Your issue is not a complex one at all, stop flattering yourself. It is a straightforward issue. There are no children involved, no matrimonial home to deal with or any alimony questions to be settled! Stop being silly. He has left you. and sent you the divorce papers to be signed. No one has tried to chase you away. Everyone has been very kind and understanding towards you. The Sangat has been great to to you!

You really need to You really need to stop flattering yourself so much. The panth did not reach this state because of few idiots like you or him! Our panth has much bigger problems to deal with. Much more serious problems and not some mundane everyday matrimonial problems, which can be dealt by ordinary courts of the land or some mediocre psychiatrists or even marriage counsellors! So, don’t flatter too much. Flattery is not good for anyone.

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Hey how are you feeling now? 

how do you feel about therapy? I can message you someone recommended? Are you in London? I really do hope you start to feel better but I do think you need face to face support. If you feel really lonely and just don’t have it then I can zoom call you and promise not to every tell anyone or disclose who you are. Will that help? To talk to out?

 

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Guest Sangat

Great response from $$$$_guest

Original poster, you blamed everyone apart from your husband. Wasn’t it an arrange marriage? Surely he had a person (or a few) on his mind before marrying you. He and his parents realised you’re not a match

I wonder what the boy and his family are going through with you delaying everything. He deserves to be happy too, however he wants to do it. You haven’t a clue what’s happening in his house right now. His new lady partner could be making him aloo parathas right now as a Sunday morning treat ??

Please be careful where you communicate your problems, there’s people who will trick and exploit you being vulnerable right now. Insult us if you want we forgive you as our sister and daughter. This Sikh forum is one of the safest places for a bibi to get genuine advice from fellow gursikhs (without revealing identity), don’t forget that. 

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On 8/6/2020 at 3:16 AM, Guest Sangat said:

Just to add, actually maybe “Advice is FREE” is the original poster, posting as gupat. I just got a feeling it might be.

Everything is in Guru Granth Sahib Ji, including one particular shabad. Do abhiyas of that shabad and you can be re-united with your beloved.

But I believe its incorrect to tell you that shabad, because your husband sounds like a right **** of a man. You deserve a proper god fearing husband not someone who treats you like filth. 

Nope. GUEST Advice is free was me. I was on a different computer so didnt want to bother loggin in. 

I feel sorry for the OP. You ppl r so harsh. I cant call you guys sangat, just society. Harsh and judgemental.

On 8/6/2020 at 3:30 AM, Guest Sangat said:

In fact I’m certain “Guest Advice is FREE” is the original poster.

She mentioned before how she gets angry with her own family. Well I’m a registered user on this forum who she’s spoken with over last few months. Love filled conversations 

Now she’s saying I’m an <banned word filter activated> and sangat’s advice sucked.

 

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Guest Sangat
1 hour ago, Not2Cool2Argue said:

Nope. GUEST Advice is free was me. I was on a different computer so didnt want to bother loggin in. 

I feel sorry for the OP. You ppl r so harsh. I cant call you guys sangat, just society. Harsh and judgemental.

 

So you're the one who needs to learn some respect! That's not an OK way to speak about the Guru's sangat, to say our advice sucked. You know members of the sangat don't just write advice and move on, we also secretly do paath and ardaas for people too. The guru taught us to be compassionate and we are.

I neglect time with my own family to keep an eye on this forum and try help people best I can

 

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On another note I was just thinking that maybe you need some perspective. There’s people out there who lose their kids... babies and children or even adult children. And that hurts bad. There are people who have to divorce who have children which cause so many problems for the kids. There’s women and men who lose their spouses of many years to death. People lose their parents which they will miss forever...... do you see what I mean? You are strong enough to get over this? Imagine when your parents or sister pass, that’s a loss worth being this upset over... 

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On 8/10/2020 at 4:16 PM, Guest Sangat said:

So you're the one who needs to learn some respect! That's not an OK way to speak about the Guru's sangat, to say our advice sucked. You know members of the sangat don't just write advice and move on, we also secretly do paath and ardaas for people too. The guru taught us to be compassionate and we are.

I neglect time with my own family to keep an eye on this forum and try help people best I can

 

Im honored to be in the sangat of true sangat. ;)

But kicking someone down when they already down isnt wise. 

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