Working wife , a good idea for me or hazardous one ?

[jkvlondon]

53 minutes ago, H908 said:

Ppl pick up bad habits like gossiping and complaining and you can make an argument thats its a result of punjabi values and thinking but how you guys talk about women i feel sorry for the women in your life or you guys just have had bad ppl in your life

anyone can make silly arguments for doing dubious things but if you do then that says a hell of a lot more about yourself than the other person. Be a good partner and show trust and affection rather than try to trip or spy because everyone needs privacy to collect their own thoughts , speak their mind without being judged . This is what makes life hard for Indian women the constant monitoring and being judged whilst being expected to be fulltime job holder , housewife and carer - no man would want to do it by themselves and yet act as if it is the sole reason the women are invited to be in their lives - which a fairly disrespectful way of thinking.

[Jai Tegang!]

19 hours ago, AjeetSingh2019 said:

I have seriously considered installing spyware on her phone that gives me complete recordings of her calls, esp her pesky sisters who keep stirring her , and also all messages she might do . The software is a bit expensive but one can't detect if its installed on their phone. 

So that I know what she is doing. This is just to prevent her from someone taking her inadvertent misuse. 

Is it wise to share such detailed household problems out in the open? If any other sikh from mumbai uses this forum and pieces together your profile, it could cause you much grief if they out you, no?

Genuinely saying this, since you do want to keep your orientation undercover.

Apart from giving random people some entertainment, I doubt you sharing your regular problems is of any help for yourself. Maybe being more anonymous would have been helpful from the get go.

This is my general observation and not pointed towards the quote.

[H908]

On 11/18/2020 at 4:06 PM, jkvlondon said:

anyone can make silly arguments for doing dubious things but if you do then that says a hell of a lot more about yourself than the other person. Be a good partner and show trust and affection rather than try to trip or spy because everyone needs privacy to collect their own thoughts , speak their mind without being judged . This is what makes life hard for Indian women the constant monitoring and being judged whilst being expected to be fulltime job holder , housewife and carer - no man would want to do it by themselves and yet act as if it is the sole reason the women are invited to be in their lives - which a fairly disrespectful way of thinking.

Yea alot of guys on here are playing victim and blaming women for being promiscuous or sexually free. Have some empathy and see what women have to go through as well. I guranttee there are good women nor all are looking to screw ppl over

[Guest]

On 11/19/2020 at 4:55 AM, Jai Tegang! said:

Is it wise to share such detailed household problems out in the open? If any other sikh from mumbai uses this forum and pieces together your profile, it could cause you much grief if they out you, no?

Genuinely saying this, since you do want to keep your orientation undercover.

Apart from giving random people some entertainment, I doubt you sharing your regular problems is of any help for yourself. Maybe being more anonymous would have been helpful from the get go.

This is my general observation and not pointed towards the quote.

I agree Fully with you but have I given so much info someone could track who I am based on bits of information here. I always had this thought in mind hence kept information at broad level. 

 

[MisterrSingh]

On 11/16/2020 at 9:16 PM, Guest Disgustedbymenonhere said:

Why are you even answering this ridiculous question? Have some respect for the woman who’s stuck with you when you aren’t giving her the full deal as a husband. You should see her as beautiful for what she’s putting up with. 
That question is irrelevant and shouldn’t have even been asked.

Spoiling her? You need to change your understanding of what a wife is. My husband would never talk about me like that, we are partners and a team and my happiness is his happiness vice versa. Grow up for the sake of teaching your child good values and respect for women.

You may live in a fantasy world where a lumbering 16-stone (100kg+) woman is as desirable and eye-catching as a comparably petite and attractive girl, but for the vast majority who are in touch with reality the question is valid.

If she's unattractive (overweight or not) there's a reduced chance of her catching the eye of another male. There are many other issues at play, but it's a consideration. Why are you repulsed by logic?

OP definitely isn't "giving her the full deal as a husband" as you stated, so if she were to spot someone during the working day who would take a shine to her based on her looks, there's an increased likelihood of her being swayed by the attention, even more so due to the lack of genuine affection that she isn't receiving at home. 

[MisterrSingh]

4 hours ago, H908 said:

Yea alot of guys on here are playing victim and blaming women for being promiscuous or sexually free. Have some empathy and see what women have to go through as well. I guranttee there are good women nor all are looking to screw ppl over

Wait a minute. So there ARE justifications for being promiscuous even when married? Do two wrongs make a right? Is she a child that acts out when she doesn't get her way?

[Ranjeet01]

1 hour ago, MisterrSingh said:

Wait a minute. So there ARE justifications for being promiscuous even when married? Do two wrongs make a right? Is she a child that acts out when she doesn't get her way?

She's saying it's OK for a woman to cheat on her husband if her needs are not being met.

But if it is the other way around then it is not OK.

[MisterrSingh]

57 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

She's saying it's OK for a woman to cheat on her husband if her needs are not being met.

But if it is the other way around then it is not OK.

And she minced her words and obfuscated her true intentions by not stating this in an unambiguous manner. Tells you everything you need to know, doesn't it? 

[Ranjeet01]

30 minutes ago, MisterrSingh said:

And she minced her words and obfuscated her true intentions by not stating this in an unambiguous manner. Tells you everything you need to know, doesn't it? 

This code female language or womenese :

She is also saying, "I am a woman , I am perfect, and  I don't have any accountability for my actions, I have every right to make bad decisions but I will not take responsibility for my actions.

Don't you dare question me for my bad actions.

You are a man and therefore it is your fault for me making these bad decisions, you take responsibility for it!"

 

[MisterrSingh]

1 hour ago, Ranjeet01 said:

This code female language or womenese :

She is also saying, "I am a woman , I am perfect, and  I don't have any accountability for my actions, I have every right to make bad decisions but I will not take responsibility for my actions.

Don't you dare question me for my bad actions.

You are a man and therefore it is your fault for me making these bad decisions, you take responsibility for it!"

She practically agreed with my original sentiment (paraphrased): "The wife will cheat on Ajeet if she feels she's been mistreated, taking into account his compromised position as a you-know-what."

Yet I was shamed for articulating it and expanding on the premise, and offering up any potential justifications, on the part of the wife, for it happening. Hilarious, truly hilarious.